How to deal with confrontations by shop workers if cant wear a mask

[Chelle25]

Hi all, looking for some advice for a good friend of mine who also has asthma.

He was in a small supermarket yesterday and was accosted by a shop worker for not wearing a mask. The worker himself pulled down his own mask to confront my friend! My friend advised his asthma conditions were worsened by wearing a mask so as per the Scottish govt he was exempt. He also produced an exemption card/sign as advertised on this and other websites (which we supposedly do not have to prove anything). The shop worker then said he had to wear one for other customers. Again my friend repeated he couldn't. Then he was told he would have to zip up his coat and out it over is face. Again this would restrict his breathing. He was eventually 'allowed' to shop but is now very anxious at trying to shop anywhere again. He does not live nearby and has no one else who can shop for him.

Does anyone have any advice? I am so angry that anyone with a valid exemption can be confronted in this way and made to feel like they shouldn't be out of their homes.

[twinkly29]

I know it's not helpful but I'd be tempted to use another shop if possible and also share the awful experience so others knew how unsupportive and humiliating it was in that shop. That's what I'd want to do but don't know if I'd be brave enough!

[Chelle25 in reply to twinkly29]

Thank you for replying and the advice. It makes a difference knowing there are people that can understand and offer help like on here.

My friend (as I know many others will be) was anxious enough about going to a shop on first day it has become mandatory here as it was.

It's a shame some people cannot understand what it's like to have any condition that cannot be physically seen.

Luckily my friend went in to a smaller shop this morning and after showing them exemption card they did not have any problem.

The other supermarket in question was Tesco so good luck to anyone using them!

[Blue-Breeze]

I have brittle asthma and do wear a mask. I did read the CDC site which said even asthmatics can wear a mask. I know this is not what loads of you want to read sorry. However it really freaks me out when I'm not. Although been out so few times and trialled a shop once! My own GP who has helped me so many times in full blown attack has rules that you have to wear a mask to the surgery. I was told to and I did. If you do research you can see that some are far easier to breath through than others. I have 2 and 3 layer cotton. 2 much easier. Medical type masks are very difficult, which we should use. My husband uses a thin bandana. He has asthma.

Research is well worth a read rather than for me made to feel a outcast.

If you still decide this really is not for you report to the manager or shop elsewhere. Looks like this is going to come into place in England soon. I'm ready.

Most of all stay safe.

[Chelle25 in reply to Blue-Breeze]

Hi and thank you for taking time to reply.

I too wear a bandana which is slightly easier but my friend also has bad anxiety. Being challenged like that by a shop worker did not help the situation.

I agree there are alternative materials to consider and should be tried, but if someone really cannot cope with reduced breathing ifeel there should be more consideration especially when in this case it was brought to the workers attention.

I wish everyone luck in finding a face covering that suits them if they can but do not feel bullied in to it if you truly cannot.

X

[Blue-Breeze in reply to Chelle25]

I suffer with anxiety situations. Being challenged like that is totally unacceptable. That would put me in doors for ever. So for me I've done the next best thing. Lot of research. I carry 3 with me all the time even on drives out with my husband were we are not even getting out. I have a choice then. I'm in control no one else.

I wore them in doors first to get used to the feel much like what they suggest to do with very young children. Never wear them for long time.

I really hope you can find a solution as do others.

For me and I'm truly not advocating for all, this really is best for my well being.

[Chelle25 in reply to Blue-Breeze]

That is how it should be, people should be able to do what is best for them.

Thank you for your kind advice and support.

I am glad you and your husband have found what is best for you.

[twinkly29 in reply to Chelle25]

Equally you should be too - yes absolutely some asthmatics (of all degrees) can wear masks but not everyone can so please don't feel you "should be able to" just because others can.

[Chelle25 in reply to twinkly29]

Thank to you too for your support and advice.

Really is a comfort to know we aren't alone.

[Blue-Breeze in reply to Chelle25]

I'm no way saying it's easy but anxiety compounds asthma. I've done what's best for me. Your friend needs to report this guard to the store manager for being a bully.

All the best

[Spikedog66 in reply to Blue-Breeze]

Hi. Try a paper mask I have copd and asthma. I needed to go out yesterday first time in nearly five months to a local eye hospital and masks mandatory... Wore it for over an hour and was OK, hot and claustrophobic but managed. I carried my blue inhaler in my pocket. I have a card for exemption too. If I hadn't been able to breathe it would certainly have come off. Put the mask under your chin whilst shopping and no one about just use it when getting served but by no means struggle to breathe. Unless you live with a breathing issue people don't understand. Hope it's better next time.

[Chelle25 in reply to Spikedog66]

Hi

Thank you for reply.

I agree any form of covering is hot and claustrophobic. I can manage ok for short amount of time but my friend has added problem of anxiety as well. (As many do).

The supermarket have since apologised and said no one should be challenged about not wearing face covering, especially when they have shown a card.

I hope no one else has this issue but if they do please report to the shop to raise awareness.

Hope you also keep managing ok with yours. Stressful times for all x

[Afrohair]

Shop online

[Eastend555]

If you cant wear a mask end of story your exempt no problems.

Call the Manager if they cant do anything let them call the police.

Next day go in there again with all your mates who cant wear a mask

not only do you prove a point you have a good laugh

We might have difficulty breathing but we aint got no problems laughing

XXX

[Carriejen in reply to Eastend555]

The police cant do anything. They're not arresting people for not wearing a mask 😂 also why would vulnerable people gather in a group, in a little supermarket to prove a point? Surely that's increasing their risk of catching something as supermarkets arent low risk places

[Eastend555 in reply to Carriejen]

Carrie i was joking it was supposed to be light hearted banter.

Relax chill be happy Carrie

XXX

[Carriejen]

As someone who works in the aforementioned supermarket we have been advised we cannot challenge anyone who enters the store without a mask. We cant ask people to leave and we cant ask why because the risk of us being physically attacked is far too high.

However, has your friend tried alternates to a mask? I cant handle the throwaway masks or even a scarf but my mother in law made some from duvet covers and those are fine with me. Has he tried other fabrics and things? It doesnt have to be a mask, any sort of face covering will do.

Alternately go to a different shop.

[Chelle25]

Hi Carriejen,

Thank you for confirming what I had thought about what you and your colleagues would have been told.

My friend was so upset at their treatment after being a customer in same shop for years. They have tried many types of face coverings but nothing seems to work. They have since gone to a smaller shop and had no probelms but I didn't want anyone else being confronted by the same worker so I complained. Tesco have since apologised and said they will speak to everyone in the store to make sure it doesnt happen again.

People are worried enough in recent times as it is.

Thank you for your reply and about your own experiences.

[Carriejen in reply to Chelle25]

The issue is that everyone is very uptight right now. With the masks theres the additional worry for us of shoplifters or robberies etc. Plus the worry of catching the virus, taking it home to family members too. But it was definitely communicated down that we shouldn't be refusing people access. The issue here is also that people can just refuse to wear a mask and that's that. But like I said, the majority are complying so fingers crossed it helps 😁

[Smoggy1990Boggy]

Cn your friend not wear a snood, a thin scarf over his face? I have asthma and am wearing a face mask to protect myself as well as others. There are comfortable ones to wear. I would suggest your friend sees what is available to purchase. Mine is reusable so put in washing machine. I would prefer to wear one than worse become unwell with Covid 19.