I’m new to this forum having struggled after the birth of my daughter in September and suffering postpartum psychosis. I’ve had two separate submissions to the MBU where the second was for anxiety I developed after a short period at home after my first stay.
I’ve been out of the hospital a while now but my cognitive ability still feels impaired. I don’t know if this is from my medication or the lingering effect of the psychosis. Anything I have to concentrate hard on is a challenge. I have found driving again particularly challenging. I am just wondering if anyone else has experienced this and if it will get better with time.
Thank you for the support.
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Floof400
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Welcome to the forum! I'm so glad you've found us.
I'm Ellie, I'm one of APP's national peer support coordinators, and had postpartum psychosis myself in 2011 after the birth of my son.
Definitely I can relate to your question about cognitive function after experiencing PP. It was hard to know what caused it though. I struggled with anxiety and depression after the psychosis, and I think this had a lot to do with it. I felt quite consumed and distracted by my thoughts, so found it very hard to concentrate on anything, or take much in, for a while. This got better as I recovered though. Then there is of course the medication. Antipsychotics are generally quite sedating, and I think can affect our cognitive function too. I was able to reduce and come off these in time, and things got better then too.
I struggle even now to remember things, I think some of this is becoming a mum, and just juggling lots of balls in life. I find lists invaluable, to remind myself of what I need to do
So the main thing I did want to say really was that yes I definitely did experience this, but that it definitely got better as I recovered, and as I reduced medication. I am sure you will find it gets better too, you won't feel like this forever.
Thank you so much for your response. It means so much to me to hear your story and to her that the cognitive impairment will improve. Your words are immensely reassuring at this early stage of my recovery. I’ve just got to be kind to myself and be grateful for how far I’ve come already.
Hi Floof400 congratulations on the birth of your daughter.
I have to agree with Ellie_at_APP . I personally put my cognitive function down to medication but I don’t know for sure what caused it.
However, I did feel a lot better in myself coming of antipsychotics, I felt more like me again.
To the point that I returned to my job 10 months after my baby was born & if I’m honest sold myself short on my abilities as I really didn’t think I could do the exact same job role (managing two completely different teams). My employer was/is very accommodating and changed my job role (I’m only working 75% what I used to hours wise so I led with not wanting to be expected to do 100% of my previous role). I honestly didn’t think I could do it again, but it’s all fallen into place and I remember most things.
I take my time and get support when needed by do feel my cognitive ability is back after recovery.
Thank you so much for your reply and for sharing your experience. Delighted to hear you made a full recovery of your congnitive ability. This gives me lots of hope for the future.
I can also distinctly relate to feeling like my cognitive function had declined after having PP. My experience with PP was over 20 years ago but it changed my life profoundly. I am in the US, where we do not have MBUs, especially not in those days. I also lived in a rural area and mental health personnel there weren’t entirely sure of my diagnosis, even though they knew I just had a baby. Long story short, they put me on a lot of medications and sent me home after two weeks in the inpatient unit. I was expected to go back to work a couple days later.
I have a very clear memory of getting in the car to drive to work that morning, starting down the road and realizing I was so impaired by my medications that I shouldn’t be driving. Luckily I did not have to go very far and I did make it. But once I was at work I struggled to do even the simplest of tasks. I felt like I was swimming through honey. Nothing felt simple anymore. That sensation did not leave me, even though I kept complaining to the doctor that I couldn’t function. I struggled to feel normal again for a very long time. Sadly, my ability to work was compromised to the point that I eventually resigned my position, which was a terrible blow to me, as I loved my job. I knew I wasn’t doing a good job and I couldn’t continue in good conscience.
The good news is, it doesn’t last forever. Much of what you’re experiencing is side effects of the medication, and when you stop them your mind will clear up again tremendously. I don’t think your cognitive function is much impaired by the psychosis you had. However that was pretty traumatic for most of us and I know I personally have spent a lot of years in therapy talking about it and trying to process it.
On top of that, Ellie very rightly pointed out that you are a new mum! Having a baby is mentally challenging even for a perfectly healthy person. I have made many a silly mistake simply from distraction and fatigue!
Please be patient with yourself. You have many very legitimate reasons that you might not feel your best right now, but all of it is temporary and fixable. One day your normal self will come back. Hugs from across the pond.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I’m sorry you had such a difficult time after your PP. I was fortunate to have a great MBU not far from where I live. This helped my recovery immensely.
I will try to be more patient with myself and not be too self critical when I feel I am struggling. So happy to hear you believe this state is only temporary. It’s too soon to come off my meds, but I look forward to when I can. Hopefully, I’ll be back to my old self.
I had the same thing and I thought it was because of having a Baby/Medication/trauma. I'm three years postpartum and I have recently stopped medication and I feel like my brain is only now becoming that bit sharper.
I do now believe it was the medication impairing my cognitive function. I hope with time things improve for you. Please do not rush of medication, take your time and allow your brain to heal.
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