Too complex for bipolar?

[Isabella5991]

Hello ladies,

Gah I’m exhausted..

Has anyone had assessments and been told they’re too complex for bipolar diagnosis?

3rd assessment of the year and making slow progress into finding out what I have.

In my life I have been diagnosed with GAD, OCD, deep depression, delayed pp psychosis, eating disorder, a tic disorder, Pmdd and lots and lots of bouts of mild mania, hypomania and one extreme episode of mania when I had pp. I have also been told it’s quite likely I have autism, I have been doing lots of research and I fit quite a lot of the criteria for PDA autism.

I was hoping I’d get an answer today. I was expecting bipolar diagnosis, but they said I was too complex seeing as so much of it is ocd based, trauma response, very sensitive to hormone changes and all the psychosis and mania. They can’t give me one clear diagnosis as much as they wish they could, since they can see how much I want an answer. They think likely a few and possibly autism. Not ruling out bipolar though.

They want me to keep a mood diary and see them again soon. I’m just exhausted. It was a really hard day. I had really bad dissociation in the meeting where I felt like I’d fainted (hadnt) and didn’t understand what was going on and felt confused. I got really upset and cried. They explained probably due to delving into all the trauma.

Autism assessment could take a few years so may go private, maybe even a fourth opinion?!

Hope you’re all ok xx

[Zebunisa_at_APP Moderator]

Hi Isabella5991 , it sounds like you are going through so much. No wonder you are exhausted. I think writing a mood diary would be a good idea. Take it one step at a time, do the mood diary, see your dr again and go from there. Try not to stress too much about the diagnosis.

I think for the rest of the day/week take it easy and don’t over do it. Look after your well-being and focus on what you can change and do, maybe some exercise or pampering?

I hope you feel at ease soon💕

[Isabella5991 in reply to Zebunisa_at_APP]

Thank you dear. Yes what a good idea, take it easy. Maybe some swimming and more family time xx

[Arabella-]

Goodness how stressful, I really feel for you. In a couple of years you’ll be proud of how you got through this challenging period of your life.

I have bipolar and had PP after my first daughter. I went on Olanzapine and Sertraline and have been well since. I went on to have two more children. They are my world and I love being a mother.

I found prioritising having fun helped me - simple things like having a bath, watching some Netflix, having a lie-in. I found writing a list of things I was grateful for really helped focus me on positives.

You will recover from PP, so try and be kind to yourself in the meanwhile.

Lots of love and hugs xxx

[Maria_at_APP Moderator]

Hi Isabella5991, I am sorry yesterday was hard during the meeting, going through history is very tough, and I am glad to read you have some plans for treats to pick you up, they are so very important.

It is very positive that they are following you closely and asked for a mood diary, those are positive steps that will help arrive at an answer, but I agree with Zebunisa, just try an focus on taking the next step, and not get overwhelmed with all the many possibilities.

Take very good care,

Maria

[Kat_at_APP Volunteer]

Dear Isabella5991

I just wanted to empathise with you - it sounds like such a gruelling process, and I’m so sorry you’ve had so much trauma to deal with on top of psychotic / manic episodes. It’s a “lot”, to say the very least!

I also agree with Zebenisa around not getting too stressed about the diagnostic labels and particularly on taking it easy on yourself. You are fighting what seems like a battle both with your own thoughts and feelings, but also with a healthcare system into which you don’t fit their boxes.

I guess all i would add is that you are uniquely you - nobody else has your experiences, your genes, your traumas, your strengths and your weaknesses. That can be a scary thought, but I hope in time it can be a source of motivation and inspiration for you too. No matter what labels are given to you by others, they are just “best guesses” given the symptoms you happen to display at the time and the history that you have chosen to share. The labels aren’t “you” and you don’t ever have to be defined by them.

I’m sorry not to be more helpful, as I know you were looking for a diagnosis, an answer, but I truly believe that in time you will look back on this and be glad that they didn’t try to pigeonhole you. To be honest, they sound like quite caring and person-centred health professionals, so I’m glad for that! Psychiatry is definitely, slowly, changing for the better…

Take good care. All the best

Kat x

[Isabella5991 in reply to Kat_at_APP]

Thank you for your lovely message, you’re v kind. Luckily, I’ve had 3 really lovely psychiatrists at this same location this year, I know it doesn’t always go that way.

It’s true, we’re all unique and I guess it can be difficult to give an answer when there’s so much at play (happy and well for the most part now though).

I guess I’ll have to accept their uncertainty in giving me an answer right now, keep attending the appointments and see how it all unfolds in time xx