Hi all I posted on here 2 years ago talking about Psychosis after the birth of my son in 2010. I had a little girl the year before who lived only 8 hours but no PPP there just grieving. I have gone on to have another son last year he is 18 months now. My GP is fantastic and referred me to all the right people. They didn't think I needed preventative medication as I made a full recovery after the first episode and weaned off olanzapi r and sodium valproate after 9 months. I wasn't hospitalised on that occasion. So they watched and waited after birth of my 2nd son. I was very anxious and was obsessed with getting past day 10 because that was when I became ill before. At day 10 again I became rapidly mentally unwell. Because it was night somebody came and I was aware of what was happening and was told to go to a hospital a few hours later. But I then thought I had something physical wrong and dragged my dad to our local hospital which has a very basic minor injuries unit. I ranted on for almost 12 hours. During which time a doctor assessed me and I was meant to be taken to a MBU in Eastbourne. But it got too late.. My dad thinks paperwork was not done properly and I just wanted to go home. But I couldn't in the state I was in. All the stuff has said and thought in my first episode was coming back. I then spent the night in a hospital for mentally ill. Was transferred to the MBU where I spent 4 weeks with my baby which was very helpful. After a few days on medication I started to improve. Only olanzapine this time. 10 mg at night and 2.5 in morning. Also a sleeping tablet for a week or two. I came home after 4 weeks. It wasn't easy, I struggled as my husband works away but he did take a lot of time off. I was anxious and panicked sometimes about getting out with the baby but as the medication reduced and I got well this got better. The side effects for me were so horrible. Tired all the time. Emotions cut off. I stayed on olanzapine for a year. Was on 2.5mg by the end. I have been off it for 5 months now. I have recovered but I couldn't cry until about 2 months ago. Get angry it happened to me. See all theses mums who sail through..breastfeeding which I had to stop. Only saw APP on facebook didn't know about them. But did know about this forum. It's nice to know I am not the only one and show you can recover. I love my sons very much. Still think about my experiences tho. Probably did have "normal" post natal depression too but didn't want any more medication. Thanks Sarah
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