Well... it's only be a few days that I've been home from the hospital. Today I found myself going back to old habits. I weighed myself countless times. I ate well but I had a goal for my number of chews. Worst of all I purged again. I don't know if this is ever going to not be who I am. I just hate letting go of this control and it's so hard to let loose. But I know if I dont than I'm going to die.