Bewildered! : My husband has just been... - Memory Health: Al...

Memory Health: Alzheimer's Support Group

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My husband has just been diagnosed with a preliminary diagnosis of MCI . He then had a further scan because the previous one had shown up shrinkage of the brain in the cerebellum ? However now he has another appointment to get further results but his appointment isn't until May ... we just feel that he was given the news but now we are just in complete limbo and bewildered! He has got worse even since the last appointment ... e.g. He took a double dose of an opiate medication he has for severe back pain because he couldn't remember me giving him the drugs before I went to work . I was absolutely frantic !! When I'm at work he just sleeps all day long and doesn't eat or drink . I'm finding work very hard just leaving him but don't know where we go from here .... feeling abandoned !

7 Replies

Your first step should be to make the opiate medication inaccessible to your husband. Contact the office of the doctor with whom he has the May appointment and state that you want him to be seen sooner. Ask the doctor's office staff if you can get a referral to a social worker. Social workers got me through the stages of my husband's dementia.

Joolie58 in reply to jaykay777

Thank you for the reply , that's the first concrete piece of advice I've been given ! He does have an assigned key worker from NAVIGO but we've only seen her once and I keep ringing but she's never available , she was supposed to come to see us today but didn't turn up so when I rang she said she'd been meaning to cancel the appointment as she is going to come nearer May !!! She couldn't stop to talk as she was dashing out to see someone else ! I just burst into tears !

jaykay777 in reply to Joolie58

Joolie58 -- That is so disappointing that she can't come until May. What is NAVIGO? I'm guessing that you are in the UK Are you? Sometimes tears are a good release. I hope that although your husband doesn't eat a lot, you can encourage him to stay hydrated by cool water and beverages for him. You're fortunate to have the change of pace of going to work. I was retired by the time my husband showed signs of dementia, and found it very trying to be home all day with someone who spent a great deal of time in bed. And of course, there's the slow loss of the person we used to know.


Joolie, as Jaykay said, your first step is to make the opiates, and really all of the meds, inaccessible to your husband. He is only going to become more confused about what he is taking and leary of why he is taking it. Secondly, I can't stress enough how important it is that you educate yourself on the effects and likely behaviors associated with MCI and dementia. It is difficult to gain too much knowledge about this process and the more you know the better equipped you are to deal with it and you will need all the ammo you can get. Third, and maybe most importantly, make sure you have help! Both physically and emotionally. You must work to keep yourself healthy. You still have a life and you can do your husband no good as a partner and caregiver if you become ill as well. Please find ways to occasionally get out to get a break whether by yourself or with friends. This will become vitally important. I'm so sorry you and your husband are having to go through this, I wish you well.

Joolie58 in reply to Poppygail

Thank you

There is an excellent resource available for you in a book called Living with Mild Cognitive Impairment: A Guide to Maximizing Brain Health and Reducing the Risk of Dementia by Nicole D Anderson, Kelly J Murphy and Angela K Troyer - all PhD's

You should be able to order it with this ISBN number: 978-0-19-976482-2 from any bookstore

I myself struggle with symptoms of MCI and found it very educational and informative.

Joolie58 in reply to PNIAuthor60

Thank you I will look for the book

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