im worrying about my mother

Hi there....Im new here .im so pleased to find sites like this where you can be honest about your concerns ,knowing its ok as amongst people who understand.Right now im hoping for a bit of advice about dementia /alzheimer's..Im not sure about the difference between these 2 .Just im worried about my mother who is 80 years old.she has had lots of major health problems .Yet she has always been mentally strong and has always been into her crossword books and puzzles.i have never known her not to have her nose in a good book.Just these past few months she has become forgetful it wasn't a concern to start with.The past few weeks her memory has got worse and im concerned.i care for my mum and phone her everyday I go to see her 4 or 5 times a week .it had started before xmas and we were chatting on the phone .she ended up talking about something funny I had done but she suddenly got me mixed up with my older sister.she called me by her name and was talking .since then I have lost a brother (mums son age 52) 4 weeks ago.Now though its become so hard for her to remember anything .she didn't even know where I lived the other day .she cries for my brother and yet at times she dosent seem to associate her feelings with him.it can be as though im talking about someone I know.when I talk about something yet an hour later maybe ill bring it up again .Yet she acts as though she is surprised by what ive said.I tell her "we were talking earlier about it mum." she cant remember a thing.everyday I seem to be repeating and repeating because she forgets everything ive said.i was talking about her grand children earlier and she didn't know who they were.Also my mum and dad divorced a long time ago about 29 years infact Their marriage was a very bad one yet she keeps asking if he has a girlfriend.shes so surprised when I tell her no .yet she hasn't seen him for 30 years and it suprises me when she asks this.

She also gets depressed yet has never suffered with this before.She oftens tells me that she dosent feel like her home is her home and at times she looks around and thinks the furniture.food .infact everything belongs to another person.as she dosent recognize anything as being hers.Then a day or 2 she knows its her home.any advice is appreciated ,I just want to know how I should handle this .. thanks sorry for rambling on

8 Replies

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  • Whatsupdoc -- Welcome. You will receive lots of good support here. The suddenness of your mother's symptoms seems unusual. You might start with a visit to her primary care provider or whatever doctor has seen her recently. Also, a call to your local Alzheimer's Association may give you some direction. I am not a medical professional, but wonder whether your mother might have had a minor stroke. Whatever the cause, she definitely displays signs of dementia. I don't know enough about vascular dementia to know whether it has a more rapid onset than Alzheimer's. My mother had Alzheimer's and her sister had vascular dementia. I know little about her early symptoms because I didn't live close to her, and my father minimized what he told me about her condition. He died suddenly, and, as an only child, I had to step in and get guardianship of her. Your mother is fortunate that you are in constant contact with her.

  • Thank you so much for replying, great advice. sounds like you have had a trying time.Must have been hard for you and an emotional for upheaval for you and your mum. Thanks again jaykay777

  • I would suggest taking her to the doctor as soon as possible

  • Hi. I'm new here too. I just had a VERY similar experience. My mom is blid, and has lived with me on and off most of my life. Well, the last year she had been getting just a bit more confused, but nothing too serious. She's 72, very frail, and blind. I thought it was just part of her aging. Well, the week before Christmas she started hallucinating I think. Talking to and about people that weren't there. Then the dsay after Christmas I went out and came home to find her wandering around the family room. Having knocked over almost everything. She was also constantly talking about people who were not there, and calling me mommie. Well, I got her to her primary care physician, she was admitted to hospital and after an MRI and psychiatric evaluation was diagnosed with Alzheimer's induced dementia. So I HIGHLY recommend taking your mom to her doctor. My mom's symptoms of dementia seemed to come on so fast!! One day she was just a bit more forgetful, the next she's hallucinating and wandering our home. So I'm not sure what caused it to be so fast, but it can happen. So please don't wait. Get her to her doctor for an exam as soon as you can. I hope things go well for you.

  • Have her checked for a UTI. My mom has dementia and was suddenly more forgetful. She woke up sick one day and I took her to the hospital. It wound up she had an no symptomatic UTI and that can cause sudden aggressive symptoms. I hope this helps.

  • Hi Cathy. Your right on the money. My wife has dementia as well with multiple other problems. She has intermittent UTI's too. I know when she has one because her mental status also suddenly gets worse and she even becomes semi comatose. Instead of taking her to the hospital each time, I finally got her doctor to prescribe an antibiotic when I call him with her symptoms. I always have Nitrofur on hand which she readily responds to. Good luck.

  • Thanks Chuck. Since my post my mother had had another UTI. The symptoms were subtle and my sibling insisted she was fine. Two nights later she fell and broke her neck. She will be in a skilled care facility WITH a babysitter at my insistence and now my sibling agrees. Listen to your gut!!!

  • I agree completely. Sometimes our "gut" knows more than even the medical community. Good luck.

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