After discovering Mike had a tumor in his brain, they decided that whole brain radiation was the way to go. He received 10 rounds, which he finished last Friday. We also learned via cat scan that the cancer has invaded his bladder. Mikes eye sight has gotten worse, and by worse I mean he can't see anymore. Yesterday he began with excruciating pain in his kidneys. And last night he showed me where his whole pelvic area and upper thighs are pretty swollen, which he says also hurts.
He has been through so much and I don't know how much more he can take. I'm trying to be strong for him, but lately I've been breaking down myself. Our kids hearts are breaking. And there's nothing I can do about any of it.
I've added a picture of Mike at Bob Evans after his last radiation.
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Puppypaws78
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Words fail at times like this, Puppypaws, but I will try. I can only hope you feel some of the genuine warmth and empathy the folks on this forum have for your family. You are not "breaking down," you are simply feeling, and it's absolutely the right thing to do when you see Mike going through this.
I know I speak for many men here: Thank you so much for being there for Mike and your family. Hopes and prayers... - Joe M.
Prayers offered as well. So heartbreaking what you're all going through. Such a terrible disease - and all of us here can attest to that. But you mama bears that are trying to stay strong not just for your husband, but your children as well, have an especially tough road. Just know we're all praying for you.
So sorry to hear about Mike. He is so blessed to have you fighting along side him. I hope there is a friend or counselor you can talk with to help you carry the burden.
Bob Evans! Best biscuits and gravy. Mmmmmm. I can barely speak ! This fuckin disease! I’m so sorry that he’s suffers so much . It ain’t right! 🙏😩
Hi puppypaws …. Dang … that’s one heavy load you have to carry. Warm hugs for you and Mike … it’s so agonizing to hear this. I feel your hopelessness. Mike looks to be fully ambulatory , still, that’s a good thing. I hear you on his kidney pain. Has he gotten a urine microalbumin test recently and if so what was his test result. Mine is up in the 150-200 range and I have the kidney pain as well. For me, a medium opiate ( Vicodin tens , or 2 mg dilaudid) take the harsh edge off … doesn’t knock it out but allows you to get up and do a few things …. Much more comfortable. When it flares up to excruciating and seeing colors when you move or press on it , a dilaudid 4 or maybe 2 of those will stop that pretty well for a while. Dilaudid’s peak delivery only lasts about 2-3 hours tho. Backing with the vike 10s is very helpful. This is just my own experience, discuss this directly with mikes GP or oncologist …. Sooner is better.
Mikes palliative/ hospice care team has special staff that can give you ( and Mike if he needs it ) meds to cut that heavy anxiety and despair considerably. Probably won’t make it disappear but could make you feel much more comfortable and able to cope way better. Maybe you could ask his oncologist to set you up or if you already have that palliative care nurses card ( like I do. They will field calls 24/7 if you need them). Once again, sooner is better.
Not much I can say here except just stick with it, we humans are tough and resourceful… mike is still in the game , share some hugs and kisses … maybe act on some of what I have mentioned… to get the harshness to soften up a bit.
Wow. You are both amazing people to have gone through all of that these past few weeks. In one of your earlier posts, you mentioned maybe getting LU177 treatment. Sending my prayers that your Oncologist can find the hail Mary treatment.Lots of love from across the pond in England.
So sorry for his suffering and yours. Seems like the doctors are doing all that they can and so are you and your family. These are hard times. Just take it day to day. Hopefully he is getting meds that will stop the pain. That is so important. He is surrounded by a loving family and that means so much to him. Sending prayers your way..
This is heartbreaking to read. You are the one that holds the family together and that is tough. Hopefully, Mike can be given effective pain relief soon. Lots of prayers and love to you at this difficult time. 🙏
Thank you all for your kind words and prayers. I pray for you all every night also. We have been in the ER all day and night. Apparently the tumor on his bladder is pressing against a tube coming from the kidneys? I will know more when Dr. comes by in a few hrs. We came here around 2 PM, it's now after 4 AM and we are still waiting on a room to be admitted. I ran home, got me some blankets and a pillow and made myself a bed on floor.
Ps. Our son turns 16 today and I did get to get out and get him a sweet 16 present yesterday.
Praying tonight for your family. Your post helped . it helps me with my husband and 15 yr old just knowing you are out there battling too. Yes try and find help at hospital with ideas for pain management so when you get home you find comfort. Lots of hope and prayer to you and yours
So sorry to hear Mikes journey has taken such a turn and we pray for comfort and healing. Make sure to take care of yourself as that is very important.
I am so sorry that you are going through this so young. I am praying for you, Mike and your kids. Happy 16th to your son! One of the hardest things, I know, right now is your feeling of helplessness and your utter exhaustion. Praying that you will find relief, rest and strength as you continue to battle. May God Himself wrap His arms around you and hold you up.
You struggle with how weak Mike is and how well he can cope with treatments, especially invasive ones and balance it against perceived benefits to make him more comfortable. At this stage in his life, comfort is essential and perhaps looking at something more long term, such as a Fentanyl patch that administers a constant dose and can keep the other meds for breakthrough. I can't imagine what you are going through and how you must struggle with any decisions, yet Mike is providing guidance for those of us who have this in our future. Right now that is cold comfort, and I offer my hope that there are good days ahead. Take time for yourself to stay as strong as possible.
There is so much going on the stress you speak of is understandable. I hope that you, yourself, have a support system. Caring for a loved one can be draining at a time when you need your strength, emotionally, physically and spiritually.
Stay strong. Get help even if it is just a visit from a neighbor to relieve some tension for a few minutes.
We are praying for you Mike, and your family. The Lord still works miracles in our lives. I am a living miracle right now, in spite of previous doctor's grim forecast for me. By the Grace of God, a new doctor, different treatment, no adverse symptoms. I am blessed! There is hope, Mike. We are praying for the Lord to bless you and your family in like manner. We hear you and He hears your cry. also.
All I can say is gods peace around you and kids,blessings.🌻
so sorry to learn what's happening for Mike and you; his family .... i have and will continue to pray for you ... perhaps consider taking-a-look at envita.com ... sending you lots of hugs ... Nous
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Mike is on hospice
