2nd appointment with MO

[GranPaSmurf]

Yesterday was my 2nd appointment with the MO. Some may remember that I was very dissatisfied with the first.

I started the visit with my own little speech. First, my apology. I had expressed my dissatisfaction to others in the clinic (I had started - then stopped - the steps to change Medical Oncologists), that's no way to have good communication. No way for one man to deal with another. I was wrong. I should have come to him, one-on-one, first.

I moved on to tell him what I expected of him.

TallAllen, are you reading this?

Be prepared about my case before the meeting - explain and teach about his conclusions and recommendations, I want to know and understand what is going on with my disease.

Listen carefully to my questions and ideas. I'm going to continue to research on my own. (doctors everywhere these days must HATE the internet).

So, when I come up with some 'full of shit' idea, I want to hear from you "Krebs, you're full of shit and here is why..."

I wrapped up with, "If you aren't comfortable with my expectations, then maybe we're not a good fit. We should both understand that as soon as possible."

"You've pretty much described what I would consider an ideal doctor/patient relationship," he said.

I kind of think we're buddies now.

[Tall_Allen]

Read it. Glad you've moved the relationship to be a more patient-centered one.

[GranPaSmurf in reply to Tall_Allen]

👍

[Gearhead]

I think we have to have realistic expectations regarding things like physician time and listen/talk ratio for an office visit, even for something as serious as PCa, given the reimbursements that health care providers receive for such a visit.

[GranPaSmurf in reply to Gearhead]

Ahhh? OK... What are your realistic expectations for your quarterly 15 minutes of facetime with the primary guide for your survival?

[Gearhead in reply to GranPaSmurf]

Good question. Of course this depends on one's objectives as well as the particular physician's modus operandi. But I think we can all agree with your words re seeking guidance for our survival. For me (but maybe not others): I try to steer clear of irrelevant talk about golf, vacations, Etc. This may seem obvious, but I have acquaintances who eat this up and interpret it as good bedside manner. I first let my doctors talk without much interruption if they are asking pertinent-sounding questions, explaining treatment plans, etc. I always have a list of questions, which I get to when it seems that I won't be interrupting what the Dr. is trying to tell me. I have a pen and paper to jot down answers (depending on the physician, I suspect that this can impress or intimidate). Questions can be tricky. I've asked some that have led to time-consuming answers that made me want to say, "Stop, I get the point." Also, no matter how cooperative you try to be, it's sometimes hard to avoid questions that appear to disagree with the doctor's treatment strategy. Occasionally you can tell that the doctor is thinking, "Oh crap, this guy's read something on the internet, and now I have to explain it to him." Finally, in my particular case, I've found that my oncologist's assistant really knows her stuff, and she can usually hang around to answer questions or clarify things after the Dr. has to run off to his next patient because his "15 minutes" are up.

I see that this came out as a really long and mostly obvious response. Oh well.

[GranPaSmurf in reply to Gearhead]

Good info! I think the MO I'm referring to is top notch. But I believe he was sloppy in our first visit. I'm sure he didn't even review my chart ahead of walking into the room for the first visit.

In the recent visit, I wasn't angry, just assertive. The tone in the room was cordial and professional.

But he now knows that I expect his best in every encounter.

Your reply started with the off topic chit-chat. With my appearance, that happens right away. I have to take the initiative to politely go along for a bit, then ask a medical question... steer the conversation back to what we're here for - I didn't do a good job of that 3 months ago.

[rscic in reply to GranPaSmurf]

I think it is common to come into a room, look at the patient info and "wing it" from there. Problem is things can be missed due to being rushed ..... I had that happen and fortunately caught it.

[larry_dammit]

I was lucky on my oncologist, I had met him previously on another matter. He’s straight forward and to the point, when I come up with a suggestion that you guys have talked about he has always heard about it . Grands. Don’t give up ,it’s a long battle with this monster 🙏🙏🙏

[j-o-h-n]

More with honey.....(and money)

Good Luck, Good Health and Good Humor.

j-o-h-n Saturday 09/28/2019 11:16 AM DST