I presently have a local Urologist and Med Oncologist. But am switching, turning, leaning on the best IU Health Med/Oncologist next Tuesday. Why Is it difficult to terminate, sever ties with unnecessary or un-knowledgeable Uro Med Oncologist?? This should be easy. But I've got appointment Sept4th with Local Urologist. Terminating decisions are hard for me.
Any suggestions??
No problem for me.....I moved 1400 miles away. Now have to find all new PCP, Onc., Uro. Dent., barber, etc. Today looking for new glass shop.
I understand the difficulty with this. I have the same problem. I would not worry about providing some kind of explanation to your current doctor for switching doctors. You do not owe anyone an explantion. If asked, I would just say something like "It will be a better fit for me." If pressed for more detail, "I'd rather not get into it right now" or something like that.
This next part is not something you need to share with the doctors: It's your life and you need the best care you can find. Don't worry about someone's feelings getting hurt, there is too much at stake for you.
Wishing you the best in this transition.
I don't know - I just stopped seeing 2 of them after I didn't like them - I owed them nothing, and I didn't care what they thought of me, IF they thought anything.
I couldn't agree more, often it's just a numbers game to them, I am looking for a different one as well. I don't feel any misplaced loyalty to them, it's like looking for a good car mechanic.
Hope all goes well.
Phil
While nobody should feel bad about changing doctors, I completely disagree with the view that doctors, in general, don't care about their patients and simply look at them as a number, or simply a means to make a buck. My wife, father, one of my brothers, my nephew and many others I know are doctors, and none of them feel the way you and many others on this site describe them. There are bad apples everywhere- doctors, lawyers, cops, teachers.....Let's not besmirch an entire group of people based on the actions of a few. The 2 docs that have treated me at MSKCC have been wonderful. They often run late, (which I wish wasn't the case, but they are highly sought after and very busy, so I am thrilled to have them treat me, even if I have to wait to see them.
Hi, I meant no offense to any good doctor, who really is caring, but the number of times we read on here of those negative experiences seems to point to an issue that is very real.
My urologist asked me " what treatment are you on ? " " I don't seem to have the results of your P.S.A " he denies that side effects exist with any treatment recommended, is not open to discussion. I write him a cheque, I leave with another set of pills ( side effects not included ) and cross my fingers that it's going to continue to work.
In this case the pills are working, not the Urologist.
I am pleased that you have found some very good people and hope that it continues that way for you.
Sincerely.
Phil
No offense taken. But it certain seems
Like you should find someone new to treat you.
Either way- good luck
A good car mechanic? Where?
Good Luck, Good Health and Good Humor.
j-o-h-n Saturday 08/17/2019 8:03 PM DST
I just fired the head of a major Prostate Cancer Urology practice and enjoyed doing it because of his lousy style of treating patients and his unwillingness to answer my questions or discuss any PC topics i wanted to from the research i had done. Sorry but i dont think most of these doctors care all that much about losing a patient unless it will be accompanied by some sort of formal complaint. You need a Urol or other practitioner who is knowledgeable and experienced for sure, but more importantly , in my opinion, someone you can actually talk to and get along with. Keep moving until you find them. I do. Good luck!
Thxs kayak212, yes sir a knowledgeable and forward looking Urologist. That sounds reasonable. I’ve gotten along extremely well with my IU Health Urologists. Now had 3 plus my Local Urologist in Ft Wayne.
4 uro Doctors is a bit many. I’m sticking with my Urologist/ Oncologist who is on the state of the art newest medical treatments. For prostate cancer!!
It's your life, if you're not comfortable with a doctor and don't feel like you're getting the best treatment you have a right to switch.
Agree. It can't be said enough: It's your life.
Magnus,Kayak212,gregg57,
Yes agree to all. My best response would be “I’m getting the best latest newest, clinical, research forward, advanced treatment plan available for my body.” Prostate cancer and my Cardiac health go together :: I’m focused on an inter operative total treatment advanced prostate cancer plan (s). This means my entire body, mind, side effects control, exercising continuing daily, workouts personal fitness trainers in my life again, jogging cardio weight lifting, healthy dietician assistance, and a Team if Support !
Sounds like I’m looking for all the right things. Don’t you think? Men.
Doug
I was thinking about this again. You really don't need to say anything. Just get your new team going and if you need medical records, they can get them. I really don't see why you need to say anything to your ex-docs.
Just say YOUR FIRED they work for you
Fired that can be said over the phone right?
Sure that way you do not get charged for an office visit,it is not as much fun,make sure you have a new Dr. lined up,good luck
All my well wisher PCa advanced men. Yes, Tine to narrow down my four(4) Urologist Doctors. 1 in FT Wayne. Local. 3 in Indianapolis IUHeath Doctors. I’m keeping my super Urologist/ Oncologist in Indy
One thing fellows: my last visit to Ft Wayne local Urologist when my PSA jumped to 10.2ng/mL his RN automatically came in and said “READY FOR A SHOT”(Lupron) ... I told her NO! Not yet! This was even before my Urologist talked with me.
1st thing most Urologist or RN’ think of let hit him with ADHT! That will fix him. I’m glad I’m where I’m at next Tuesday in my Life.
Doug
I was left waiting bright and early one morning for an appointment in the doctors office for an hour and a half. No one checked on me during that time. So I said to myself, "You're fired!" and walked out. His office tried to call me 45 minutes later. I didn't answer and that was that.
Whoa what an exit. I’ll call Dr Urologist office the end of next week talk to his nurse. Amanda will understand or not it doesn’t matter.
There my Ft Wayne Urologist are expecting my next PSA test by the end of Aug. Not gonna happen.
After a visit with my Uro which went badly I called his office to cancel my next appointment. Receptionist wanted to reschedule but I said I am finished with him. She wanted to know the reason I am leaving his practice. I told her that he is an asshole. Nothing but silence on the other end.
I also fired "Snuffy" Myers over a billing dispute.
It's interesting. Once you have cancer, there's no more mincing words.
A note about changing doctors: I have twice asked a current doctor for records to be sent to another for a consultation, once for a second opinion and once for me to consider changing my custom to the newer practice. The first time when I arrived the records had not been sent. The second time I knew better and after requesting I waited a few days and checked with the receiving doctor. No records received. I visited the sending doctor and required an audience with the staff member responsible for such duties. She faxed the records while I watched and gave me a set for myself. DO NOT ASSUME a request will be handled promptly, or at all. Plus have a set for yourself.
Yep I’ve already down loaded my FW urologist total Medical records over the last 9 years into .pdf files. I’ll look again and make sure I’ve got all of me records before terminating severing his services.
Good advice. I always get hard copies of everything and personally go to pick up records a consulting doctor requests. I like to control information, and don't want to get somewhere without being 100% sure. The best institutions are still bureaucracies and often inefficient administratively. I don't consider that to be malignant intent. It is just the way big organizations are.
I have already fired one, a "nice guy" oncologist but useless IMHO, and am thinking about letting go of another because his people dropped the ball on a critical blood test. Take yourself out of the equation. What would you do if it were your child or your spouse? Patients quit doctors all the time. It's part of the biz of medicine. Good luck with your decision.
These docs should be "big boys" by now and should have no problem with your decision. If they do, than THEY have a problem. I work in a field where one day, my client leaves me and decides to hire a peer of mine. The next day, my peer loses a patient who ends up hiring me. I take no offense. As far as I am concerned, the patient is either making a mistake, or, they don't like the message I am giving them, (often times, I have to deliver disappointing news to my clients), and they search elsewhere hoping to hear a message with better news. When, they leave me for someone else, I always wish them the best and mean it. I doubt that will be the case, but I take no offense. Any true professional should feel the same way.
I understand the emotional difficulty with firing anyone. I ran a reasonable sizable business and never felt good about firing anyone. It always took me a bit longer than it should have but I did it when necessary for the good of the company.
I view the relationship with my oncology team differently. It is the most important medical relationsihp ever contemplated. Literally life and death, in real and emotional perspectives. Therefore, it is easier to end medical relationships that are not satisfactory for trust in expertise and/or bedside manner. I was being treated at Penn Medicine in Philadelphia and had utmost confidence in the urologist, surgeon, and radiology teams. The first 2 oncologists I interacted with, made me uncomfortable for different reasons that can be summarized by saying their bedside manner did not suit my personality. I requested to see the 3rd member of the team. They said NO. If i didn't want to go back to the two Docs I did not care for, they suggested a couple of other Medical oncologists in the area. I considered which one I disliked least for about 60 seconds and then said to myself, "self--who's agenda is more important at this institution, the Doctor's or the Patient's (me)." It was clear to me, this department in the institution cared more about their agenda and ego than making me comfortable. I suppose you could say they fired me because going back to the Docs they told me I had to see was a horrible choice. I went to Sloan Kettering and Mt Sinai in NYC for consultations. I liked both Doctors. It wasn't because there was a different message. It was because they delivered it in a way I could understand, and then answered questions patiently while looking me directly in the eye. I chose the Doctor at Sloan Kettering, mostly because it is MSKCC and then, after the first month, coordinated treatment at Jefferson in Philadelphia. The Doc at MSKCC was a fellow for the MO at Jeff so it is a very comfortable relationship for all of us. Good communication, fast answers to questions, and thoughtful consideration to the volume of my questions, without making me feel like a nuisance, even though I am sometimes. It is important to feel like a participant in my care and to feel supported and respected.
While I understand you might be reluctant to reject someone directly, it is too important for you to feel totally comfortable with your team. There will be difficult discussions and decisions. This is a time to place your needs at the top of the list and have complete confidence your Doctors are treating YOU and your family the way you want, and need, to be treated. Firing a doctor because you think someone is better for you, will only hurt for a moment. Staying with someone you are uncomfortable with will be a long term source of irritation. My advice is to rip the bandaid off, and get to a place that will be better for you.
17.7ng/mL PSA July 1st. And Yes what a trip or life change I'm having now. It was just July 12th I saw consulted with my newest Urologist / Oncologist @ IU Health Indy. Doing the math that's 35 days from today. He suggested urged scheduled my 68Ga-PSMA-11 PET/CT scan 01 Aug. Now that's history "AVID" lit up spots on posterior of my atrophied Prostate, and several(s) "AVID" lit up spots on both sides of my pelvic lymph node chains. My PSMA scan did exactly what it was designed to do. Find trouble.
Fast Forward to Aug 20th. I'm referred to an IU Health Simon Cancer Center Facility Medical/Urologist consult/evaluation. Yes I'll be down there early from Ft. Wayne and already have sent a multitude of my med doc's, tests, Dx's past cardio issues and maybe too much. But its my life and I'm going with the best team @ IU University School of Medicine Cancer support caring Facility - IU Health Simon Cancer Center.
Oh by the way I've downloaded my med records from local Urologist patient website access and you guys have made it so so much easier severing the ties with physicians.
Thanks, Philly13
Best way to fire anyone..... Go into a room and sit down with that person. Next, say "The last person to stand up will no longer be working for me" then stand up fast.....
Good Luck, Good Health and Good Humor.
j-o-h-n Saturday 08/17/2019 8:16 PM DST
I think most doctors see so many patients. I doubt they will notice and probably will not take it personally.
Sending hugs, prayers and healing love!
Softwaremom
This probably will not happen. See my update just written softwaremom00. Amazing how things happen in the medical/insurance world.
Late Breaking News as they say on TV or Radio. My Local Urologist FW TBC(to be cancelled) appointment Sept 4th sent in a Notice of Approval for LUPRON Depot service dates 9/4-12/3 2019. I had no absolutely no idea until I got my Insurance Medication Intake Team letter in mail today. So the plot thickens as they say. Oops like my local FW urologist is Automatically Deducting I'm due for ADHT Lupron injection time.
But I have not cancelled, severed, terminated my Sept 4th appointment or even considered doing his my FW Urologist new PSA lab. My anxiety is growing a bit anxious!
? Is it time to Bite The Bullet and call his office this Monday, talk to his RN and severe ties? (cancel appointment)?
I think you already know my answer.
It must be stressful and hard if your MO doesn't get on with you or a bad fit. Personally I couldn't be happier with mine, he did a great job turning things around for me, he was as overjoyed as I was about my last scan results, I saw genuine empathy at that last meeting, I knew for sure this is the right guy for me.
I'm in the position of not being tied to a medical insurance company and being dictated on what Doctors or treatments I can and cannot have.
I hope you have better luck
Well done deal! 08:24 called left message w/local Urologist RN. I Stated please cancel appointment 9/04. I’ve got medical Oncologist evaluation/ treatment appointment tomorrow 08/20. 08:47AM she called me back. 13 min elapsed! She told me she canceled my 9/4 appointment. If I need anything else just call us sweetie. Done deal. No severing ties, just office visit slashed. Very professional very concise no problem. Whew that’s off my mind.
No severing req’d.
Do male urologists and oncologists avoid referring patients to female doctors? What do you think?
Will greatly appreciate your perspectives
Just booked my husbands Mayo Dr. Visit
Locally Advanced Prostate Cancer, at diagnosis
post prostatectomy psa
