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ADHD_LCSW profile image
17 Replies

Hello Community,

I have ADHD and was diagnosed about 10 years ago. I've struggled with the symptoms my whole life, but I thought my difficulties were personal failings. I am working to heal from the years of negative messaging from myself and others. It is a journey.

I am also a psychotherapist and am interested in connecting with other psychotherapists who have ADHD.

Looking forward to learn from you all :-)

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ADHD_LCSW
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17 Replies

So did you start treatment ten years ago?

ADHD_LCSW profile image
ADHD_LCSW in reply toGettingittogether

I’ve been using medication on and off for about the last 5 years. I finally found a good combo that works for me. I’m sensitive to the meds and initially was quite agitated on the medication but I’ve now found a good combo and take it most days.

coffeeandweed profile image
coffeeandweed

I love seeing therapists with these disorders! You have a better than otherwise ability to see where we're coming from.

I have a history of abuse because of this and other crap too, and I was only diagnosed at 56, being 58 now. I'm still in the process of learning how to do things - all over again - to get through my day. Like when I'm looking for things I have to fixate on the colour of what I'm after rather than the object itself. Otherwise I'll miss it even if I'm looking directly at it.

But yeah, I know what you're saying. If you have any good coping mechanisms like what I described, don't hesitate to post them.

STEM_Dad profile image
STEM_Dad in reply tocoffeeandweed

I know what you're talking about, when looking for something.

For me, I have to visualize the location of where I think it is, and the orientation I last remember the object being in. Then, I'm much more likely to recognize it when I see it (but sometimes I don't recognize it on the first pass if someone had moved it out turned it a different way). The funny thing is, I have a great skill for turning visualized images around in my head, so if I don't find the thing I'm looking for, then I imagine it reversed and look again.

The color trick works, too. When I was still married and my wife asked me to look for something, I would often ask her where she thought it was and what color it was.

coffeeandweed profile image
coffeeandweed in reply toSTEM_Dad

Oh man, the location/orientation method would never work for me. I'm the master of the organized mess. Here's my hobby bench to give you some perspective.

I've tried online IQ tests that seem to indicate I'm pretty good with 3D stuff, so I'll give your trick a try. As for remembering locations, we'll, let just say that's not my strength.

ADHD hobby space
STEM_Dad profile image
STEM_Dad in reply tocoffeeandweed

The location trick is something that I figured out a few years before I got my ADHD diagnosis.

Everyone seems to experience that phenomenon where you walk into a room for some purpose, but when you get there, you forgot why you went there. That's been proven to happen in at least one scientific study. I think it's even worse when you have the Inattentive form of ADHD.

(scientificamerican.com/arti...

Before I first read that article, I figured out my visualization trick one day when I was looking for something (I don't recall exactly what it was, maybe scissors or some other tool). I was living in a two story house, and I remember that I was upstairs when I started my search. I thought that the thing I was looking for was in a certain part of the kitchen. As I was passing through several areas of the house, I was so intent on finding the thing I was looking for that kept a picture of the kitchen counter in my mind, and the object in it. When I arrived, I found it easily.

It was then that I realized that, for once, I wasn't hampered by the "doorway effect". I've used this trick repeatedly over the years. It really helps me in my current job, because half of the tech support issues I deal with can be done remotely and the other half on-site with the physical tech equipment.

I've since realized that it's similar to a technique that I'd heard about many years ago to visualize what you want to achieve, and you are much more likely to achieve it.

coffeeandweed profile image
coffeeandweed in reply toSTEM_Dad

Now see, the visualization trick doesn't work for me. I can look straight at it and completely miss it. Now when I look for my (present) lighter, I fixate on red and it damn near jumps out at me.

I actually picked this up by reading a series of novels by Karin Slaughter about a govt agent named Will Trent. This guy has dyslexia and rather than name his files he colour codes them with stickers.

Soon after I started trying that and found to my relief (and amusement)... it worked! I must see if Slaughter has a website so I can let her know that.

As for going to another room, I've taken to telling people what I'm going after for when I come back asking. That's great when someone else is around.

Since I found out about the ADHD 2 years ago at 56, I've been training myself to rewire old habits and looking for colours is now automatic. I gotta teach myself your positioning method, but with my attention being the innocent victim I don't even remember putting things down, let alone where and how haha.

STEM_Dad profile image
STEM_Dad in reply tocoffeeandweed

I've known other people that color coding file systems work very well for, including my ex-wife. She always seemed to remember the color of things very well (much better than I do), so often when she asked me to look for something, I would ask her to tell me the color of it. I can search for a color easily, just not always remember them very reliably.

The location-based memory works for me. I think it's a family trait. I also have a great appreciation for maps (as well as charts, diagrams, schematics and blueprints...and math). My dad and grandpa are the same, and so is my older son (except that while he's good at math, he doesn't like it).

--------

What I also have an appreciation for is the diversity among people. That goes for what we look like, where we're from, our varied experiences, and how we're each wired a little differently in our minds.

If everyone was alike, this world would be a really dull place to live (for me anyway).

I feel like there's always something I can learn from others, no matter how old or young, or where they're from.

And after getting a crash course in learning about ADHD in the last year and a half, I really get that the same strategies don't work for everyone.

--------

Karin Slaughter does indeed have a website!

karinslaughter.com/

She made that easy to find, but the website only has a way to sign up for her newsletter. It looks like she's active on Facebook, and her website also has links to Twitter and Instagram. So, if you want to find a way to reach out and let her know that color method really made a difference for you, it looks like social media is the way to go.

🙂

coffeeandweed profile image
coffeeandweed in reply toSTEM_Dad

Hmm... may have to break down and actually (gasp!) get on Facebook and message her. Can't stand social media; too many idiots on there. Hard on the anxiety. I'm more into sites like this or Deviantart where I can do more productive interacting. Maybe I'll be able to talk the wife into it haha.

ADHD_LCSW profile image
ADHD_LCSW in reply tocoffeeandweed

I’m so sorry you experienced abuse. No one should have to go through that. Isn’t it amazing how we develop tricks to get ourselves through this world? It is one of our ADHD super powers!I think the thing that has been most helpful for me was learning that everyday mundane things are harder for a person w ADHD, not just the remembering to do it but the actual doing. I remember reading once that something mundane and repetitive like doing the dishes is actually painful for us. Knowing this has helped me push through that difficulty in a different way. I used to moan and complain every time I had to do the dishes, like it was some horrible thing that my partner was torturing me with. Once I learned that this struggle was about my adhd, it helped me just do the damn dishes. And now, I don’t love it but it is much easier to get through and not nearly as painful as it used to be. It also helped to know that it was putting an unfair burden on him. Doing the dishes wasn’t “helping” him, it was me taking responsibility for something adults have to do.

I’ve been able to apply this example in other areas too. It’s slightly easier to do things I hate doing now. But, I still procrastinate like crazy w most difficult tasks. When I do get something done, though, I’m kind of ridiculously proud of my self because I know what I had to overcome to get there.

ShortyKat profile image
ShortyKat in reply toADHD_LCSW

Thank you for saying that, doing my dishes is horrible. I have found that if I put a show on Netflix and just listed, then I can do my dishes. That is what I have to do soon, as my mother is going to come and look at my apt. I find that so embarrassing.

ShortyKat profile image
ShortyKat in reply toShortyKat

*listen

coffeeandweed profile image
coffeeandweed in reply toADHD_LCSW

Yup, dishes are terrible. I have difficulty cleaning up around the house. The way I see things is like in those computer games where you have to find the objects hidden in plain sight. Or Where's Waldo. This is any room and I have to make sense of it. Nope, I'm the master of the organized mess.

But when it comes to mundane repetitive tasks, hyper-focus takes over and I become superhuman. I used to work in the aquaculture industry in salmon hatcheries and I could stand there all day picking dead eggs out of the tanks with tweezers.

I ended up in jail at one point a couple years ago. Adhd and poor coping mechanisms make for a bad pair. Didn't do anything to anybody, just had trouble coping with my past. I think the worst of that crap is over with and I cope with hyper-focus now with knowledge and my art. I do a lot of wood carving to pass my time and now I'm getting close to having a load of pipes for a flea market next week.

Almost Ready
STEM_Dad profile image
STEM_Dad

Welcome to the community ADHD_LCSW !

I work at a hospital, but I'm not a healthcare worker. I'm the Information Technology guy.

Now 47 years old, I was diagnosed at 45 after three decades of trying all sorts of tips, tricks, books, classes and systems to try to fix my ADHD issues: time management, organization, memory, inattentiveness and distractibility.

I went to school a lot of years, but didn't finish a degree, so good on ya for getting through school and becoming a psychotherapist. My mom only got an associates degree in psychology, but she passed on a great appreciation for the field to me. (She had a theory that a lot of people who study psychology do so because they recognize the need of it for themselves.)

ADHD_LCSW profile image
ADHD_LCSW in reply toSTEM_Dad

Thank you for the warm welcome. I totally agree w your mom. My interest in psychology was definitely born out of a desire to better understand myself and my family. I love helping people, but I am mostly driven by my fascination with people and learning how they’ve become who they are.

coffeeandweed profile image
coffeeandweed

The need of it myself was the catalyst for teaching myself psychology. It wasn't a difficult endeavor, as I managed to earn my B.Sc. in Environmental Biology without knowing about ADHD. THAT was difficult.

But with a basis in chemistry and biology, I learned a whole lot about my situation, and over the winter I picked up lots of info on neurotransmitters. I need this info because my family doctor has no interest in helping with mental health.

coffeeandweed profile image
coffeeandweed

You mental health professionals with disorders have my deepest respect!

I know the difficulty involved in getting a degree with this. And you know more than anyone where we're coming from when we talk.

I saw a shrink a couple years ago who told me that since I have a degree it was evidence I DON'T have adhd. He got called a waste of time and walked out on.

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