I wrote about yelling and hitting our young kids because often anger us.
With your young children, try giving them 2 -3 warnings about the change that us about to happen. The behavior that would like to see changes. Try counting to 10. Counting them down if the count with you. Get a firm voice and let them know about their behavior and how don't like it and how you expect it to change. My grandson is going through temper tantrums again. No he's not falling out in the floor and kicking and screaming, he's stomping his feet and sort if mumbling but I want to take my lunch, but I want to have it or that. And it's not that I didn't want to take a lunch to school it's about his timing, when wants to procrastinate about leaving for school, then that's his way if attacking to start a fight. He went a lady week without mentioning a lunch.
I've read many conversations these past few days a about hurting our young friends and someone saying is ok because we've all been their true. The thing is find a way not to go there again now that you know what you did wrung.
Maybe look into some parenting classes, child class on behavior management, event ask if you can sit in a ciupke preschool or headstart class to see behavior strategies in place. Yes the can get a little sugary but these tips just may save your child and you from child abuse.
Don't wait till tomorrow to put these thing into place. Put them in place with your next interaction with your child. These tips may work on the older children whom maybe outside the preschool and the first few grade if school but have a young mind. Search the internet for resources. You've already started the long journey of dealing with your kids, and while I know there are times when you and screen because your constantly repeating yourself, thats no excuse to hurt them.
Place them a safe place away from you and remover to breathe in and out.