Idk what’s wrong with me

I’m 16 and I have a good life, I go to a good school I have family that care about me and I have everything that I need. But something is wrong with me and I’m not sure what. I self harm and used to have thoughts of suicide often, I’m not depressed and I’m very self conscious of my weight and my appearance. I don’t want to get professional medical help as I don’t want to worry my parents and to make a big deal out of how I feel. But some part of me wants to be sad and to stay like this, I just want to know what’s wrong with me

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Hi. There are a lot of people who feel this way, although it may not seem like it. However, you mentioned that you self harm, and used to have suicidal thoughts. Even if those feelings do go away, it may come back and effect you later in life, and I'm sure you're feeling pretty cloudy if you never talk to anyone about it. I totally understand that you don't want to tell anyone, so I recommend seeing a counselor at school? A lot of schools have counselors, so that may be a good start. I think that talking to someone about this will make you feel better in life in general.

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When I was in high school I struggled with this same situation. I had normal great parents, friends, went to a good school, all the things. But I was in fact depressed; but I was a functional depressed girl. Began self harm and was so ashamed and nervous of speaking with someone that it got worse. And at some point my parents found out. I understand that feeling of wanting to be worse and be where you are; sometimes hiding is so much more comfortable than facing the truth and battling the fear. I'm 31 now, and my heart breaks for you, because i was you. As hard as it is, your very best self love practice right now is to seek some kind of counseling. Maybe a school counselor you're able to connect with? Or just be honest with your parents like you are on this forum. Sweet sister, I am praying for you to brought out of this darkness, to have peace of mind and heart, and that you will have the courage to seek help and find healing. You won't regret it, though it will be tough.

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i have the same situation as you and get that you don't want to worry anyone but talking to people may help it helps me sometimes even if its people online like now just spilling your thoughts on here may help because if you bottle it up you may end up bursting out and that's not healthy so try talking to people no one i here to judge you