Trying to find out what to expect? - Young Adults with...

Young Adults with Melanoma

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Trying to find out what to expect?

AmNic17 profile image
13 Replies

Hello, I’m 31 and a little over a week ago I received a call that a biopsy taken from my right leg was malignant melanoma, I was immediately scheduled for several appointments which ended with surgery a week from the phone call. I now have a 6in incision from my shine to the back of my calf where the melanoma was removed. I’m told that it’s gone and I’ll go in every thre months to be checked. I’m still processing bc this happened so quickly. I’m grateful it was found early but am I good now, will it come back? I’m terrified of not finding it early next time. This scared the crap out of me but those around me say it’s no big deal? Am I overreacting? I know there are those with stages that are much worse but that’s what I want to prevent. I’m a new mom and this just felt like a slap in the face.

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13 Replies
Kheifner profile image
Kheifner

Hi AmNic17,

I’m am in a similar situation- 31 y/o when an appointment with a dermatologist to get a mole I just thought was ugly removed ended up being Malignant Melanoma. I have the giant scar on my shoulder as well as in my armpit where they took a lymphnode for testing. It’s overwhelming and scary and we all process this in different ways so don’t down play how you are feeling or think you are overreacting! The thing I try to remember and that my doctors remind me of is that my 3 month followups are keeping me under close watch and will help make sure if there is anything else to catch it is caught early! I am coming up on the 6 month mark since surgery (tomorrow actually) and my second round of follow ups. The stress around the scans/derm apts/follow up apts can be pretty significant, but it doesn’t compare to the stress and anxiety I felt in that first month! Just keep breathing, take one day at a time, discuss your concerns with your doctors, and always be your own best advocate for care!

AmNic17 profile image
AmNic17 in reply toKheifner

Thank you so much for responding Kheifner! It’s crazy how much they take and how big the incisions are. I know they’re shooting for clean margins with no cancerous cells it’s just more than I expected. I hope your next appointment goes well!

Curious what changes you’ve made to everyday life if any since your diagnosis. I feel like I could strive for healthier food options, less sugar etc.

Kheifner profile image
Kheifner in reply toAmNic17

I agree the scar was so much larger than I anticipated!

I have recently started working on limiting my sugar intake based on some info I have seen about cancer and sugars. I just feel like it is something I can control, so it makes me feel better. Who knows...

I have been stressing a lot about the summer coming up and how I will handle that. I was born and raised in Florida so sunshine was my life. I have been working on stocking up on summer supplies- hats, spf shirts, sunscreen, etc to hope to alleviate some of that stress as it warms up- we will see...

I would say the biggest thing I have been working on is mental changes. I try to focus on the positives and keep a good mental mindset. I find it is easy to worry about stuff I can’t control, and stress about what could happen. I have been trying my best to find the good things in every day and focus on the aspects I can control. I don’t always succeed and sometimes I break down, but I have noticed a change in my outlook and positivity!

AmNic17 profile image
AmNic17 in reply toKheifner

Yes! Tx born and raised here so I understand. Seems like all the good stuff is outdoors and I’m a little nervous. I need to find ways to stay protected.

cbroder77 profile image
cbroder77

Hi was diagnosed in the summer of last year. The first couple months were miserable. All I did was obsess over it and search the internet. It has gotten so much better. I think it takes time accept it. It will get better as more time passes. Hang in there!

AmNic17 profile image
AmNic17 in reply tocbroder77

Yes! I think my husband is tired of all my what ifs and discussing the changes that need to be made and the internet absolutely doesn’t help. I’m hoping it gets better, thank you for responding. :)

cbroder77 profile image
cbroder77 in reply toAmNic17

I went through the same thing with my husband. Was your melanoma a stage? Mine was also on my lower leg.

AmNic17 profile image
AmNic17 in reply tocbroder77

It was caught super early and hadn’t spread to lymph nodes or anything like that. My only treatment was surgery where they removed the tumor on my right lower leg and some parts down to my muscle. My incision is about 6in from my shin to behind my calf. My husband was nervous and super helpful before and those first few days. His mindset now though is that it was caught, I’m healing so all is well and we don’t need to live in fear. Totally agree to an extent but it’s very scary for me, the possibility of reoccurrence is terrifying. Trying to find a balance!

Robynfine profile image
Robynfine

Hi, I guess you need to know some more details about your cancer. What did they stage it at? How deep was it, what was the mitotic rate, And is there any ulceration? If it is melanoma in situ or stage one that’s very good news! Just make sure that you keep on top of it and you visit your dermatologist regularly to get your full body checks. Wearing sunscreen and take good care of your self while in the sun is very important. Hats and UPF clothing are

your best friends now! Try to live with awareness and not fear!

I am living with stage 4. I have been 4 1/2 years no evidence of disease and I believe that good follow up care and awareness save me

AmNic17 profile image
AmNic17 in reply toRobynfine

Robyn, I’ve learned it was stage one and completely removed/treated with surgery. It’s yill currently healing as my incision didn’t seem to want to close. I guess my fear when I posted was wanting to know my odds of reoccurrence. if it’s inevitable or will I be okay with proper skin care. I know that’s not something easily answered or with any truth bc every person situation differ. Is stage 4 treatable/curable?

Robynfine profile image
Robynfine in reply toAmNic17

Sorry, I do not think I ever responded and maybe you already know the answer. Melanoma is not curable but it is treatable. Keep up with your skin checks and make sure to use your sunscreen. Best wishes to you!

DeniseHairy profile image
DeniseHairy

Cancer is intimidating. Period. Anyone who says it is no big deal doesnt get it. Im a few years olderand just got hit with my third diagnosis of melanoma. The scars arent much to contend with. No one has ever asked about mine (lower leg) . Im attractive,but I've never given much thought about how I look in swimsuits or shorts, so it may be I dont give as much thought to scars on my body as others.

When the sun is shining and its warmoutside, people say its a beautiful day. I agree with them...on the outside. Inwardly, though, I cringe. I cringe because that sun is linked to this condition that has wreaked havoc in my life, relationships, job and finances. I grieve the loss of beautiful sunny days. I grieve the loss of riding in a convertible during the day. It's tragic. I was never asun bather, but Ive always enjoyed being outdoors. One of my favorite shows of all times is Survivor; im enjoying less because ofthe sun exposure the contestants get.

Everything has changed. I was going to the doc every three months, then six to nine months, thennine to twelve months. After being cancer free for two years, my derm told me she thought i had an enlarged lymph node and that i shouldconsult with my surgeon. I didnt. And now, two years later, that enlarged lymph node was removed and it was cancerous.

I meet a lot of people who just dont know melanoma can be inside the body. I wish i didnt know either.

Stay the course. See the doc. Change your diet. Find people who will listen. There arent many but they are there.

Pray. Thank God for making you just as he did. Wonderfully, fearfully, compassionately, deliberately.

My daughter turned 18 and graduates high school at the top of her class in a few weeks. I dont like this, but disease is a part of life.i try having that attitude. My husband and daughter are essential to my support. My church family is essential.

I hope my rambling has been beneficial in some small way.

Denise

AmNic17 profile image
AmNic17 in reply toDeniseHairy

Denise! I love your response and your rambling makes total sense to me! I’m not to worried about my scar. If anything I think if/when people ask about it that its a chance to warn them about melanoma and taking care of their skin, seeing a dermatologist yearly etc. My scar will be especially pretty since the incision opened. It won’t be a perfectly straight clean line.

Can you be more specific about diet change? I’ve researched some things but curious what changes you’ve made.

I completely understand what you mean about inwardly cringing when beautiful sunny weather is discussed. I also cringe at all the photos I see of my sunbathing sisters and friends on social media. I’ve become that annoying person telling everyone to use sunscreen etc. I’ve always loved being outdoors especially during the summer but this year I’m dreading it. I make up excuses to my husband right now why I can’t enjoy some of our typical hobbies. I know sunscreen is great but even that hasn’t eased my anxiety about direct sunlight. This is still new to me so I hope over time I can rest my anxieties, take the necessary precautions and move forward.

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