I'm determined not to let IBS-D stop me from living an active lifestyle. I'm a married mom of 3 and also very social however most people around me don't know about my daily struggle with IBS-D. I'm not looking to share this information either. If I'm going anywhere with friends or family, I generally come up with excuses to drive separately, "my kids might need to be picked up early from sports", "My youngest isn't feeling well, I better drive separately in case she needs me." "I have errands to run before/after so I'll go separate." All of these excuses are because I'm terrified of being stuck in a vehicle with people and having an IBS attack. And the nervousness of possibly having an attack, often causes just that. I've tried timing it before, I have 7 minutes tops to find a bathroom if I feel an attack coming on.
However, there are sometimes when carpooling can't be avoided. I have an all-out anxiety attack when this happens but there are steps I've come up with that do help me get through it...
1. About an hour before we leave, I use a glycerin suppository - I figure the more cleaned out I am, the longer I'll be able to "hold it" if an attack comes on.
2. Abou 20 minutes before we leave, I take about 1/2 required dose of Imodium - If I take a full dose, I will get terrible cramps later in the day or the next day.
3. I wear "period underwear" and bring a bag with a change of clothes just in case.
Even after all of these steps, I'm still terribly, terribly nervous - sometimes I'll be visibly shaking which I will blame on too much caffeine. The problem is there's a wedding coming up. All of the ladies are going out for the night in a limo and I really want to be able to join them. If I can't even go 20 minutes down the road with a friend I've known for years, how am I supposed to drive 45 minutes in a limo with half-strangers?!
I'm wondering if anyone can relate? What have you tried? How do you balance living "normally" with IBS-D?
The one product I keep eyeing is the anal plug. I'm wondering if using this would give me the confidence I need to go on this trip but I'm also very nervous to try it. If anyone has experience with it, please share! Another product I've thought about for the anxiety is CBD gummies. Has anyone had any luck with taming their anxiety by using these?
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MeliHere2
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Hi there, Sorry you feel like this, I've certainly been there. My ibs-D is in the mornings, so I have got myself Into a routine, I wake up at 5.30 every morning, so I have access to the toilet before everyone else in my house, after my morning bowel movement I take 1 lopermide, within that time if I feel I need to go again, I will go and then take a 2nd one then that sets me up for the day and I can always go again the following morning and repeat all the above. I guess it's kind of like training your body. It took me a while to find what works for me but I finally conquered it. It really will get better, you just need to find what works for you. I give myself 2hrs in the morning to let my body do what it needs to do before my day properly starts. I do get the odd stomach cramps but I know nothing can come of it cause I've taken the lopermide (immodium), I do still avoid eating out although I have no choice when I'm working all weekend but I go easy on some foods as I can get pretty gassy. I hope this helps a little, it was the end of the world when I first got isb-d and I'm fully functioning, working mother with out the fear of that situation we all dread so much. Wish you all the best x
is it ok to take immodium daily. I E a 20 yr old with ibs d and anxiety. She’s also only in morning loose stool and I’ve been giving her Fybogel and enterosgel
Absolutely, I've been on it daily for years, doctor said it was fine aswell, I buy it off amazon too, so much cheaper, I showed my Dr the packet and got the thumbs up. I'm currently having anxiety issues right now but not in relation to my ibs, if ita helps you can go on drugs.com (think it's called) put in Lopermide and it will explain it all in detail wether it reacts with other stuff etc
Thank you, it's very encouraging to hear how other people have been able to find a routine, no matter how inconvenient, that is working for them. I believe I'm almost there with the routine I've created, the last and most difficult piece for me has been overcoming the fear of "what if that's not good enough". I know it's fear-based, since I've been following this routine, I've had no problems or even close calls. Perhaps if I start taking some baby steps and building my confidence, it would be good for me. Some short-term anxiety meds would likely help. I appreciate you sharing your story and thank you for the well wishes.
Hi there, it might help if you share your worries with your friends and family. I know that you are reluctant to do this but I have found that people are sympathetic and supportive even if they don't fully understand the impact. I don't go into details but it means that if I need to find a loo sharpish its not a surprise and that takes a lot of the worry away. There are a couple of friends that me and my husband regularly go away with into the countryside and one day I had an attack when driving in the middle of nowhere but when i explained and tramped off to a quiet field with a shovel and loo roll my friends were 100% fine with that. Even relative strangers are understanding. For example, recently I have had to stop eating eggs and when I went to my normal cafe and ordered a full English breakfast but said no eggs, i joked that I like eggs but they don't like me, the waitress was immedately saying that she has the same thing and had to give up eggs a couple of years ago. I would not expect anyone without IBS to really fully understand, but everyone has had a stomach bug at some point in their lives and many people now have gluten etc intolerance and I do think it will ease your mind if people that cared about you knew that you have an illness that could cause limitations etc at times.
You should also speak to your GP as there are anti-depressants that if taken at a very low doses can both ease IBS-D symptoms and anxiety. What really worked for me though has been giving up the food that makes my symptoms worse and taking probiotics and now my symptoms are much improved.
I'm so glad you've been able to share with family and friends. This is my first post and honestly, just being able to share here with people that understand has been a HUGE comfort and it gives me a little extra confidence to at least think about how I would explain it to those around me and that it might not go as terribly as I imagine, lol. I appreciate your comment!
I’m 100% with Liz1234ty on this one. You’ll be much better off being open with people about your symptoms than trying find excuses which, in itself, is stressful and likely to exacerbate symptoms. You’ll be surprised how understanding people are; I learnt this from a psychologist when I was struggling with a number of conditions, and it definitely worked for me.
I am sorry your going through this, it’s a terrible disease that most people don’t understand, I believe we should all be talking about it more, make people understand who our lives are. I have been in a flare up now for nearly two years, lockdown was good for me to be honest, if I have yo go out for a long time I will only eat white toast for breakfast and lunch and just mashed potato for evening meal, I find that helps in slowing down the speed food travel through our body, have you researched into fibre? There are two types of fibre soluble and insoluble one soak up the liquid in our colon while the other don’t. A healthy diet of veg is not really good while your going through diarrhoea episode. I am sure if you look into what your eating it will help you, also look at what comes out and compare it to the Bristol stool chart. Take care
You're probably right and I'm the first one to preach it to those around me about other topics "Just share what you're going through. We're in life together" but this issue is so personal and embarassing and aggravating - I just want to conquer it and move on. Unfortunately, the irony is, it seems I have to practice what I preach in order to move on and adjust my goals to "manage it" instead of "conquer it".
you never will conquer it to be honest pan we just learn to live with it, the trick is learn sooner rather than later, learn your triggers, don’t keep eating things that make it worse. And take care of ourselves more
Having a social life with IBS can be problematic. It sounds like it's time to take your IBS in hand like dealing with a naughty child. Have you tried anything to reduce the flares? For example, Alflorex probiotic has been scientifically studied for IBS. Many people's IBS is due to a gut bacterial imbalance. There is also the Nerva gut directed hypnotherapy app reduce the sensitivity of the gut and perhaps slow things down since there is a direct link between the brain (anxiety) and the gut.
In terms of a social life, it can be a case of workarounds, as you are already doing. However, if you can get on top of the diarrhea or accidents using treatments mentioned above, you could end up being far more confident about your social life. By the way if Alflorex doesn't work the next stage is the FODMAP elimination and reintroduction diet ideally via GP referral to a registered dietitian.
You may be able to get on top of it and lead some semblance of a normal life. In my case, due to being left with some food intolerances still, I've decided not to eat out. If friends are meeting for a meal, I ask to meet them for a chin wag at the end of the meal. This meant that I could have some form of social life.
It's important to recognise that anxiety is a major issue in play here. If you control this the morning urgency (or any other time for that matter) can get substantially better, I would suggest that your daughter speaks with the GP (you can go as well to support and prompt if she forgets anything) and ask to be prescribed Citalopram. Citalopram has shown to be of huge benefit to people with IBS, especially if they have anxious tendencies. Secondly I would examine food types and maybe follow the FODMAP suggestions. Thirdly I would get her to take a wide spectrum probiotic for a few months to see if it helps.
I would second what an earlier poster wrote here: Do not feel bad about sharing this information with friends. You may be surprised to learn that others have similar issues. As an example, at a book club meeting, another member mentioned that she can't eat pistachios. Since that's a high FODMAP food, it caught my attention and we started to chat a little bit and before long I learned that she also had IBS. She was kinda thrilled to know that I did too, and we became IBS buddies, exchanging books and info about treatment options. On a recent tour, I had to leave the breakfast early every morning to give myself time in the bathroom. At one point, I mentioned my problem to someone (I think I said I have intestinal issues), and the my new friend said she had the same. The fact is everybody poops and even if they don't have IBS, they've all had the symptoms. People understand, and knowing that you don't have to totally hide it can ease your anxiety. Good luck! And make immodium your friend.
My social life is very different. I live quietly alone in the middle of nowhere! I actually love that, and am nearly 70 so not really into partying now.
But I meet people (and dogs) all the time as they pass by my house, so it feels like a social whirl! lol
I am lucky because my best friend really understands IBS as she suffered with it terribly herself for 18 years. She had the "D" version and it was horrible. She told me 2 years on the low Fodmap diet cured her!! (against all advice, by the way. We are not meant to stay on it so long.) Then overnight it seems, she could go back to her normal food! But she does still get short episodes when she is very stressed.
Anyway....so she understands. Her group of friends which have also become mine as they are all lovely people, also have bad health issues of one kind or another, and at least one who thinks she too, has a kind of IBS-C.
So there is no pressure socailly. They understand 100%. I am very lucky. But the only thing I dislike is having to be picky with food when I visit, and can't drink wine any more, so I bring my own drink!
You know what? I think it is very unrealistic that we sometimes feel pressured to live "the perfect life". There is no such thing. Anyone without a health issue at all is very very lucky. Most of us, being mortal, get them sometimes. Even young people.
So don't feel you have to measure up to some perfect ideal. Remember there really is no such thing and many people are masking what's going on inside them.
But your management ideas sound good. IBS is all about management.
I wonder about the anal plug though....I haven't yet needed to investigate that, fingers crossed. But I wonder if it would weaken the anal sphincter if used too often? I don't know. Maybe I'm up a tree.
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