Help

[BeYoutiful]

I'm 13 and I've never been diagnosed with an eating disorder but lately I've been obsessing over my weight I'm 5'4 and 87 lbs which makes my bmi 14.8 I think. I want my weight to be 80 lbs and sometimes I look in the mirror and see myself as normal weight or even a bit chubby but then when I look at photos I see how skinny I actually am. People also say to me a lot "your really skinny" "do you ever eat?" Or "you should gain some weight" and that just makes me look in the mirror more. I also am scared to tell anyone... Any help?

[Ct320]

you need to find somebody you can talk to before this develops into a big thing if you see what I mean. Someone who won't just dismiss your feelings and make you feel stupid as that (in my opinion/experience) can make you feel like you have to deal with this in secret ...which is so not the right way to go about it.

At 87lbs your bmi is low for your height and age so I think its best for you to stick to a healthy balanced diet and maybe take up a sport or some form of exercise if you feel the need to get fit.

PLEASE DON'T start to restrict anything or go extreme with exercise though, believe me it will be the worst thing you will ever do and you still wont be happy either... it's not the outside of you that makes you truly happy but being able to become happy with yourself will show on the outside.

look around beauty comes in all shapes and sizes not just the photo shopped images you see on tv/magazines.

hope this helps a bit and if you need to talk to somebody feel free to send me a msg

[Hidden]

I so agree with Ct320. You are already underweight and this will have a big impact on your health and happiness. Is there a counsellor (or trained teacher) in school that you can go and talk with? It is important that you share your feelings with someone.

Please take action now. Losing weight from where you are now will not lead to happiness or satisfaction. My experience is that it only leads to further turmoil in your mind.

Being underweight is also unattractive. People are already telling you that you are too skinny. Take note.

Instead try to eat a healthy balanced diet with enough calories for your growth. It is your future that is at stake. Please, please don't go down the road of restricting - IT IS NOT WORTH IT.

[BeYoutiful in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for your help! I spoke to an adult today and it really did help to know that I'm not alone! Thanks

[Dorkysmile6484]

Hi BeYoutiful. I totally agree with the other posts. You should if it helps eat more but if you still want to be healthy eat like hardly any fats or sweets. Exercise more. Just don't eat too little but eat healthily. If you eat to little according to my science teacher once your body has eaten your muscles/fat it will start eating other things.... It will cause unrepairable damage. Actually, maybe it is repairable idk. Hope things work out for you!!! And don't worry about your weight. If you eat healthily you won't be "chubby" you'll be normal. Maybe on the skinny side. Your perfect just the way you are.

[cloggy73 in reply to Dorkysmile6484]

I don't think your reply is very helpful, not that you may be aware of that, and again don't see it as a criticism, it's just the ED. My best advice would be to treat yourself with love and gentleness which is extremely hard for someone who suffers from an eating disorder, because the critical voice is on high alert. Just be gentle with yourself.

[arihearts3]

I feel exactly the same way as you do. When I look in the mirror I think I look overweight and chubby, but when I ask my family, they say I'm very skinny. My brother says I should get some meat on me, but my dad says I'm alright. Who should I believe? Where is this going to anyway? I just turned 13 yesterday but I don't know what to do. I'm not eating very much at lunch anymore. Yesterday I just ate 2 small biscuits and a slice of apple. I don't want to have an eating disorder. Whenever I try to eat more, it feels wrong like I'm trying to make myself fat. I do ballet and a lot of exercise but I still feel chubby. What should I do???