Anal sex after cyber knife - Prostate Cancer A...

Prostate Cancer And Gay Men

1,223 members1,081 posts

Anal sex after cyber knife

FellowSurvivors profile image

I am 71 years old and my husband is 60 years old both diagnosed with prostrate cancer a week apart. We both choose to have cyberknife. No side effects two years later. My numbers have continued to come down. His numbers came down then shot up and are now coming down again. We have always and still do enjoy an active sex life in our 32 years together. Eventhough we are both ersatile I have always enjoyed anal penetration and when my prostate is stimulated it was amazing. Many times I would come without touching myself. I noticed that strong feeling is no longer there. Does the radiation kill the sensation and does the postage shrink? ,

8 Replies

after radiation the prostate is as good as gone. the nerves may still be there but the tissue is totally different, more like scar tissue than what it was before so it would not surprise me if the sensation is very different. since i have been on ADT for quite a while and have no libido it is difficult for me to remember what receptive anal sex was like after radiation. i shied away from it for a long time being concerned with doing damage. i asked my husband and he seems to recall that I did enjoy receptive anal sex at some point after radiation. Having no interest in sex at this point it is difficult for me to remember personally.

Most guys I know continue to enjoy bottoming. Radiation has little effect on nerves. The prostate will shrink over time, and usually that is considered a good thing because peeing gets better. But the nerve innervation remains unchanged.

I had LDR brachytherapy in January and I went back to anal sex three months later and posted about it here, three months ago. It was as pleasurable as it always was, no difference at all. That was three months ago and I can report that it is the same now.

I don't agree with those saying the nerves are gone. I feel it and am getting an erection from it, perhaps even more than before. Perhaps this will change over time if the prostate shrinks some, though my radiation oncologist, who's treated thousands of patients, says it should not change much. He's treated many gay men and hasn't taken note of a substantial difference.

Don't know about the impact of radiation on the prostate, per se. Yes, it shrinks. But am unaware if radiation affects nerves. I defer to Tall Allen's knowledge. Btw, my docs - knowing that I'm gay - NEVER addressed sexual behavior (other than to question possible ED).

ADT, IMRT and brachyboost here. ADT took care of any interest in sex for a long time but I continued to "exercise" my parts using a pump and hand. Glad I did. I was/am very much a bottom. It took a long time for me to "get back in the saddle,"as it were. My issue was not the feeling/pleasure from bottoming - which did not change from pre-treatment - but the possibility of a messy accident (I think that the radiation affected BM frequency and urgency...it still does). So, with caution and appropriate preparation, I was able to rejoin the bottoming world. It's still pleasurable as before.

EdinBaltimore

NYC_talker profile image
NYC_talker in reply to EdinBmore

Edin, I'm not sure what issues you're having re: preparation but I've found taking fiber supplements works wonders. I've always tried to take in more fiber in my diet, but post-procedure I focused on this more, worried about the issue you describe (I did notice a slight increase in urgency when I needed to go, but that was it, no other major difference), I did a lot more research, and there's so much out there about bottoming and fiber. And I began taking fiber supplements twice a day. It just makes you almost ready whenever you need to be, almost all prepared. It keeps everything together, so you empty out and there is less of a chance of any accident.

I started with Citrucel but read up on Pure For Men, and read the comments from people, and switched to that. I imagine Metamucil might work just as well. But whatever brand I think it has to be the right amount, and every body or situation is different. I'm taking two capsules (1400 mg) twice a day. And then i don't have to take in too much fiber via food (though still enough, a healthy amount) and it's actually better if you don't. I find it works great at being prepared more quickly and being more confident about it.

EdinBmore profile image
EdinBmore in reply to NYC_talker

Thanks for taking the time to reply. I'll give it a try...alas, at my age, 73, there are few knocking on my door (so to speak) on a regular basis but it's certainly worth a try. Apart from the bottoming prep, it sounds like it might help with frequency and urgency - this has been a worry (have not had any "accidents" but some very close calls which would not have been pretty given I was in public). Ain't it interesting that none of my docs ever mentioned your suggestions?!

Ed

NYC_talker profile image
NYC_talker in reply to EdinBmore

Doctors are often not up on the latest with bottoming, ha. If you google around you will find that fiber is now viewed as a bottom's best friend (counter to what a lot of people think, that you should just starve yourself).

Agreed...docs seem to be good at the body mechanics side of this disease but (mine at least) seem unwilling/unable/too uncomfortable (?) to address the social and emotional outcomes of treatment for gay men. Next trip to the store, I'll get Metamucil and give it a try. Thanks so much!

You may also like...