ADT and creativity: I am a composer... - Prostate Cancer N...

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ADT and creativity

Eadgbe profile image
14 Replies

I am a composer. Since I had ADT (Eligard - last shot in early April) I have experienced the conventional side effects - hot flashes, larger breasts, shrunken penis, no libido, tiredness. I am hoping those diminish over time. My question is to those who are occupational "creatives" - artists, writers, composers - and have experience with these effects.

I have noticed that my creative abilities have been squashed to a large degree. It's as if I cannot access that part of my brain that produces musical ideas, nor can I competently arrange music or edit my own works - which should be proforma. This may be due to the sleep issues but I suspect it's a bit different than that.

Several years ago I was prescribed 6 months of zoloft for anxiety. My creative output took a nosedive for those months. When I went off it, I had a huge burst of creativity for 4 months. I know the drugs are different but wonder if they both affect the pre-frontal cortex - the supposed seat of creativity. Or am I just suffering from lack of sleep? Is this what they call "brain fog?" I can't imagine that just low T is responsible since there are wonderful female composers.

Any neurologists or even speculators out there? I would like to enter into that world of creativity again.

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Eadgbe
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14 Replies
Justfor_ profile image
Justfor_

You may switch to some ARSI, aka lutamide. I had high T before starting Avodart and later Bicalutamide that brought me to the supra physiological T space (all endogenous). Judging from my before vs after Sudoku performances my grey cells are spinning proportionally faster.

jimreilly profile image
jimreilly

As far as women composers, women have testosterone, too, it' just the balance of testosterone with other things is different.

cesanon profile image
cesanon

Try some Adderall

conbio profile image
conbio

Was on ADT for 18 months 😜. And I was writing one of my books at the time. No, I really did not find it affected my efforts (Lupron)

LiveLongAndPropser profile image
LiveLongAndPropser

Hello,

Fellow composer here. I did SBRT without ADT (on a trial), but I did have quite a lapse in my creative process during the whole treatment and recovery process. I attribute the loss of my creative energy to stress and fatigue due to the healing processes, as did my behavioral therapist, she said it seems to be common among creatives. I suspect the ADT likely adds to this due to exposure of other elements your body is trying to accommodate. Ask any menopausal woman (and those who have witnessed them) that clearly, hormone imbalances absolutely impact thinking processes, so it would make sense that the combination of these factors is impacting the muse for you.

I am starting to feel the muse return to me after 9 months post treatment, so I wish the same for you, hoping your ADT treatment ends soon.

Eadgbe profile image
Eadgbe in reply toLiveLongAndPropser

Your response is actually encouraging. My ADT ended in early April, so I was not anticipating this drag to continue so long. I will have more patience and push to engage with the musical domain. Perhaps my skills will gradually return.

dentaltwin profile image
dentaltwin

I would guess the fatigue might have more to do with it than any direct effect on wherever creative juices flow from in the brain.

Guessing from your handle you play (and maybe compose for) the guitar. Wonder if I've run across your name.

About 15 years ago I was put on sertraline (Zoloft) for depression. It caused such persistent nausea that I lost a lot of weight. Didn't help the depression much either. I certainly find that "burst of creativity" to be very interesting though.

Eadgbe profile image
Eadgbe in reply todentaltwin

I recognize your moniker. My name has been run over a few times, but not from you. So best to keep anon. I look forward to longer sleep sessions.

dentaltwin profile image
dentaltwin in reply toEadgbe

Sorry to hear of your troubles. From the guitar world, we lost John Holmquist a few years ago--he posted here near the end of his life.

Hope you get some sleep.

Lizzo30 profile image
Lizzo30

I think your lack of creative inspiration is probably due to low dopamine - low testosterone = low dopamine

You can increase your dopamine by eating apples ( with their skin on ) oranges, lentils and alcohol - preferably red wine

Mascouche profile image
Mascouche in reply toLizzo30

There is also exercise :)

"Exercise increases levels of serotonin, dopamine and norepinephrine in the brain, just like medications can. Exercise improves and helps regulate neurotransmitter levels, which ultimately helps us feel mentally healthy."

Eadgbe profile image
Eadgbe in reply toMascouche

Thanks. Although I walk three times a week, weightwork 2-3 time a week, and water work almost everyday I think I can improve frequency. I know it cant hurt.

Mascouche profile image
Mascouche in reply toEadgbe

And it fights off fatigue too. I used to do mostly weight lifting but I've found that doing cardio at a pace where my heart rate is kept above 120 for at least a few minutes and with a peak of 150 or higher even if for just a few seconds, helps me be less tired and gives me a better mood.

I am not suggesting that you have to have your heart beat as fast as mine as we are all in different shape. What I mean is that when I was training just to stay in shape, I was still feeling tired and had more brain fog. Now that I've taken to pushing myself up to a point where it is almost no longer fun/comfortable, my mood is better and my energy level is up.

Best of luck!

Eadgbe profile image
Eadgbe in reply toMascouche

Thanks for the advice. It always helps.

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