Very sad

[Kazzacollie]

Hello everyone, really I wanted to post this blog to say thank you for all of your kind words of support with the worries and problems I have had in my pregnancy the past few weeks. I have sadly misscarried my baby which has devistated Myself and my husband and sometimes I wonder how we will get through it but I know we have to for our future and try to get pregnant again as soon as we're ready. But I have to say I don't regret getting pregnant because it gave us the chance to be parents although we were not lucky enough to meet out little one we take comfort with the fact we were lucky to get pictures and a lovely memory box from the hospital who have been great. Good luck to everyone who are expecting and I hope all goes well x x x

[rmh2012]

I am terribly sorry for your loss. It's utterly heartbreaking, and no words seem adequate..

We're here for you if you need us.

Take care

R xo

[Kazzacollie]

Thank you! I'm in the middle of the medical miscarriage I have to go back to hospital tomorrow to pass everything. I think this part by far is going to be the hardest part! When I keep myself busy I'm find but when it's quiet I'm absolutely crying my eyes out. Thing is I knew over a week ago that something wasn't right because my nausea and food aversions seemed to dissapear over night. I feel like it was my fault and I'm constantly running things over and over in my mind thinking did doing such and such cause it. Basically trying to find an explanation for my baby dying. I just hope the guilt will fade because that really hurts. X

[rmh2012]

Oh, hun! I know exactly how you feel. Please keep remembering that you've done nothing wrong. The vast majority of miscarriages are due to a chromosomal abnormality.

When I lost my little bubba, I had a missed miscarriage which was not detected for four weeks. I constantly wondered what was wrong with me that I didn't pick up that something was wrong - I tried long and hard to push the doubt and guilt aside. And grief is an odd and winding path - it took weeks before the regular crying stopped, and months before I felt myself again. And my little baby was due on my birthday, so while I struggle to remember any other dates, every year I'll have a pang as I remember what might have been.

And while it doesn't in any way abate grief, I try to remember that if my miscarriage hadn't occurred, perhaps I'd have had to make very difficult decisions at the next scan. So perhaps it's your body's way of allowing you the easiest path through something awfully difficult.

Make sure you've good support around you, and remember that your husband may go through stages where he's struggling and may not be in a position to offer the support he normally would. Be open and honest with him about where you are at - my husband and I were both devastated, but our experiences were different on so many levels (to start with, he didn't have the hormones in his system!!).

Give yourself time to grieve, know that it's ok to feel exactly how you feel, and most importantly, remember that you'll get through this.

R x

[Kazzacollie]

My husband has been great! He won't leave my side the look on his face when we had the scan on Monday was awful and it's one of those moments I won't ever forget. He was even saying yesterday if there was any way he could take the pain away he would!! But he can't and he knows he can't. One of my major worries now is I'm scared that I won't ever get pregnant again. This was my first pregnancy and it had taken us two years of fertility help to get to this stage. It's the unknown future...... I know no one can tell me what I want to hear but just wish i knew that's all. But the only thing I feel I have at the moment is hope x x

[wishes in reply to Kazzacollie]

So sorry for your loss, I too miscarried on may 24th although they called it a "missed miscarriage" . I didn't know until I had my scan at 12 weeks and there was only a sac there, there is nothing worse than the silence in the scan room , that's when you know something is wrong. My world fell apart. I know am happy to say we are trying for another , and I'm 4 days late but darent do a test, I wish you all the love in the world and that in time u will try again , but in our hearts we never forget the ones we lose xx

[jbs4333]

Don't give up the hope hon! I am so sorry to hear the news and wishing you and your hubby everything you dream of for the future x x

[Kaleidoscope]

My thoughts are with you, so sorry for your loss. We're all here for you. xxx

[Kazzacollie]

Thank you everyone for your support!!! There is a charity in my area called 4baby bell I would be grateful if you could pass the word around about this charity as I got a lovely handmade memory box with lots of lovely keepsakes in to remember my baby and I thought it was a lovely thing to have to keep them memories alive x

[Rowdy]

Thinking of you at this very difficult time. Don't ever give up, your dreams will come true. Xx

[Rowdy]

I am so sorry to hear this.Thinking of you at this very difficult time. Don't ever give up, your dreams will come true. Niamh xx

[Kazzacollie]

Thanks Niamh, and thanks for your advice in past questions. Hopefully I will be posting again soon eh x

[Thirdtimelucky]

I'm so sorry love, I understand you and your husbands pain, please try not to beat yourself up, about everything, I to was constantly trying to find a reason, and was very angry for a long time, and so sad that I just shut down. Here for you if you need to get anything off your chest. don't give up hope, thinking of you xx

[hope4god]

i'm so sorry dear.dnt blame urself cos u accept the pregnancy and tried ur best but GOD knows why. i know hw u are feeling now ,grief not, dnt give up hope. i misscarriaged on the 27 of july and i still believe God for anoda one. thinkig of u xx

[bumpmd]

Much love and hugs to you and your husband. I know the pain because I had to live through it too. But let me say this... you will see the light at the end of the tunnel again. It comes. Talk about it as much as you need to. It helps with healing. Most importantly, love each other... show that love... You will be blessed. I am sure everyone here responding to you will have you in their prayers, I know that I do. For me, after my incident, God blessed me with 3 other children even after I didn't think that I could do it again. So hang in there!

Much love and many prayers!

[gemmw]

so so sorry to hear that its so horrible none of us should ever have to go through that! If it helps me and my ex wer seein a fertility clinic for a year and they told me i dnt release eggs and wouldnt conceive without medical help... We managed to with help but lost are baby in feb... Unfortunately that kinda broke us.. But now im pregnant with what i like to call my miracle baby. Which i somehow conceived with no medical help what so ever and i had a morning after pill... So never give up hope babe... Im still in shock and disbelief that im pregnant.. Im nt religious but i will be praying for you.. All the best and hope that helped xxxxxx

[Kazzacollie]

Hi everyone, I got back from hospital late last night. Yesterday was the most difficult day of my life but now I'm thinking of the future and that I have been pregnant and can again! Found out also that I'm resus negative and baby was positive so now I at least know that for when the time hopefully comes around that I am again pregnant! I'm not feeling too good today buti found that I made the best decision to have the medical misscarriage it wasn't as bad as I had imagined. The nurses were very supportive and kind. My poor husband was great too he really didn't know what to do for me but he was there that's all that mattered to me. X

[Rowdy]

The medical miscarraige is the way to go. It's over now and you can look forward. Take care of yourself and your hubby. We will see you back on here in no time. Niamh xx

[rmh2012]

Glad to hear you're doing ok. Bound to be a winding path from here, but it's all just one day at a time. Hang in there through the low moments - they'll get fewer and further between. And looking forward is the best policy.

Take care

R x