Clingy baby

[Annh17]

Please someone say has this baby.

My LG is very clingy, will only settle on me, if I leave the room for 5 minutes, it’s like she thinks I’ve left her for good.

It’s such hard work, even OH can’t settle her, I understand she was in my tummy for 9 months and now with me 24 hours a day, while OH works, but is there anything I can do??

I’ve got a concert I’m going too next month and just the thought of what she will be like al day without me, is worrying me.

I put her down in Moses basket during the day for quick 10 minutes while I go for a wee, get food and drink and then she starts crying. I do leave her crying while I’m doing all this.

Just wondering if there’s anything that we can do, I was thinking of getting my OH to put her too bed, so he’s the last face she sees instead of mine and for him to get her up in the morning, so she gets used to him and not me.

I understand she’s only 9 weeks and still wants to here her mummy’s heartbeat and is used my sounds and smells, when will this start too ease a bit??? Please say it does, I’ve got a few things coming up over the next few months xx

[nikki85xx]

Morning you, I had the same with my little boy. It was a nightmare. Never wanted to leave my side . He never went in Moses basked , next to me crib or cot. At this moment he’s even sleeping on me now. Like you I’m with him 24/7 and he won’t sleep with out me. He’s a year now . At the beginning it was worst as I couldn’t even eat without him crying or being on me. It’s easier now as he can sleep for an hr with out waking up. He still feeds every 1hr maybe 2hrs each night and when I put him down he cry’s for me but sometimes will say asleep for an hr. I have tried my husband to get him to sleep but that makes him worst. I wish I could help you . It has got easier for me but it was terrible at the beginning. Maybe try a white noise machine I have 2 and that stops him waking for a bit. Good luck hun x

[Annh17 in reply to nikki85xx]

Luckily she sleeps really well, sleeps all night in her Moses basket, but during the day, I’m lucky if she will stay in there for 1/2 hour, before she realises she not on me lol. I’ve started putting a top of mine in the Moses basket, which has helped a bit... I think.

I use white noise, the Hoover works a treat lol. I understand they still need too be cuddled and I love it, but I just wish she would settle on her dad, only time she does, is when he feeds her.

She is currently on me now, falling asleep, I daren’t move or put her down 😂🙄. I’m just worried how she will be, when I have time away from her, I have a concert, hen do. I’m dreading it, I’m sure she will be fine and will be lovely to have special time with her daddy, but does worry me x

[nikki85xx]

I think she will be fine as my little plays up when I leave the room but after 5 mins he’s forgot about me . U could always give it a test go and leave the room when ur partner is there and stay in the next room to see how she goes. It would put ur mind at rest. I also had a baby swing that the little one would say in for an hr when he was born in the day xx

[Kempton]

I had a very clingy baby. It was hard. But I've been doing lots of reading recently, as I'm having another baby and trying to get baby 1 into good sleep pattern before we have two, and I've realised that it makes perfect sense for him to have been so clingy. Like you say, she was in your tummy for 9 months, she felt your warmth, listened to your heartbeat, and never had a hungry tummy or the cold to worry about.

Does your OH spend much time holding her? My son was happy to lie on anyone, me, hubby,his nannies, aunties and uncles. Get other people to hold your baby ad much as you can. I appreciate you are probably home all day by yourself while hubby works,but maybe at the weekend or when people visit?

Who is looking after your baby while you are away for the day? Make sure you leave an item of your clothing around, something that smells like you and plenty of milk. If your baby just wants to be held, she should settle with others as long as she's got a full tummy, is warm and dry.

As for when you put her down in her moses basket, put an item of your clothing in it (maybe under the baby) and try warming it with a hot water bottle before you put her in. Raise it with a towel (under the mattress) so she's not totally flat. I'd also consider investing in a while noise toy that has a womb sound effect. Put that next to her when she's lying down. Hopefully these things might help.

Make sure you enjoy the concert. Don't ruin your 'me time' stressing about the baby. As long as she's getting cuddles from someone she is likely to settle.

[Annh17 in reply to Kempton]

My OH has such a stressful job and when he comes home, he still has work too do on laptop, he always does the last feed of the day, which is lovely. If LG is fast asleep, I can pass her to other people and she won’t know. My OH is looking after LG when I’m away, which will be lovely, as he will be off work and not stressed and spending quality father daughter time. x

[Kempton in reply to Annh17]

I totally relate. My husband also seems to work non stop in and out of the office. Means I have been my baby's everything for most of his life. Though he loves his dad.

Leave an item of your clothing, plenty of milk and go and enjoy yourself! Also, in the future, I'd recommend getting a sling or baby carrier so you can get on with your day and baby will sleep on you. Can be a strain on the back but not if you get one that's a good fit for you.

[babymamajewels]

Have you heard about the "fourth trimester"? This is totally normal for babies to want to be constantly touched/on you/contact nap on you etc. I don't want this to sound negative but these sleepy days of snuggles are really numbered. Make the most of it now! Time honestly goes very quick. In my experience it wouldn't matter if daddy put my baby bed she would still want me. Are you breastfeeding? Breastfeeding is a huge commitment and basically means you can't be apart from baby for quite a long while unless they are able to take a bottle of expressed milk. I felt so overhwelmed and trapped and worried my baby was "clingy" during those first few months, so I completely relate. Is this your first baby?? It's such a huge change to your life and takes a long whole to get used to it. It did for me anyway!! But I put the housework on hold and would sit and cuddle my baby for hours watching netflix, she slept in our bed with us and also in a Snuzpod (much better than a moses basket!!! Which she flatly refused to ever go in!).

As far as the concert goes - as long as whoever is with her is happy to sit and cuddle her, let her sleep on them, gives her plenty of milk, then she will be absolutely fine. Give them a t shirt you've worn to bed a couple nights so it smells of you and have it close to her so she can smell it.

Try not to think of your baby as clingy as its has negative connotations with that word. Think of her as a totally normal 9 week old baby that is happiest when being cuddled!

[Annh17 in reply to babymamajewels]

I have heard of it, but haven’t read about it (I am going too now) oh I am making the most of it, every afternoon we sit in sofa and snuggle with Netflix, food and sleep lol. I love it, but I just wish like when we have dinner, she would settle on OH 🙄 it doesn’t help that gets stressed when she starts too cry and then he just freezes as doesn’t know what to do. I’m like, bring her close too you, let her listen to your heartbeat, Pat her bum. He just ends up passing her too me 🙄

no I’m not breast feeding and yes it’s my first baby x

[babymamajewels in reply to Annh17]

Ahh ok, it sounds like Dad needs to develop some more confidence with bubs then. You guys are only 9 weeks deep so it's such early days! Movement is key, tell him to stand up, walk around, bounce her, rock his body side to side when he's holding her. He will get there. I'm assuming he will be looking after her when you go out to the concert right? That's great bubs is bottle fed, thats a one worry you won't haveto think about!!

I remember so clearly taking a 2 second shower while baby would be screeching in the other room with my husband, or being fed dinner because I was trapped on the couch with her asleep on me! Now my nearly 2 year old is a fire cracker, and loves to be distracted with toys with her daddy, and life is completely different to those tricky new born days. You guys will find a way to work it out, have you got a bouncer?? I used to pop baby in there on the kitchen table while I cooked, and ate dinner. Soon your baby will be able to say exactly what she wants and until then it's just a guessing game to keep them happy lol.

[Annh17 in reply to babymamajewels]

I’ve told him to do all that, I think he just expects her to fall asleep straight away like a newborn, but her needs are so different now.

Yes he will be having her, I know they will be fine having daddy daughter day and she will be 14 weeks then, so that little bit more older.

As for a bouncer, yes we have 1, but she’s not that keen on it, she’s only just started liking her play gym 🙄😂 x

[Blueberry16]

Have you tried a sling. It lets baby be with you but also lets you have a bit of freedom around the house in the daytime.x

[Annh17 in reply to Blueberry16]

I have been looking into them, I just don’t like the way baby hangs in them though x

[Kempton in reply to Annh17]

Find a local sling library where you can try a few out and someone who is trained can show you how to use them. As long as baby's bum/hips are in an M position and baby's back in a C shape, you're not going to harm your baby. The neck should be supported by the fabric.

[Blueberry16]

It takes a bit of getting used to but honestly a total god send for a clingy baby.xx