36 weeks and very anxious!!!!

[bigbump78]

Hi to all the bumps out there. I am a 37 years old, mum of one which is approaching to have her second baby in UK. I have been so anxious for the whole pregnancy, as in here, NHS treat pregnancy in a very weird way. considering that two scan in the whole pregnancy period is absolutely a joke, now i found out that even though i would love to have vaginal birth i have to wait 42 weeks before they can induce me if nothing happen in the weeks before. I have spent the last 3 weeks try to convince that i have already had this experience in my country where my little one was 42+6 and after 20 hours of labor i had to undergo to an emergency C section as she was too big and i didn't dilate. No only, after 20 hours my baby was already stuck in the uterus and to take her out doctor broke her shoulder. I don't want to have the same experience as i know already she is gonna be big, (1st of December, when i was in Italy i had a scan and the baby was already 1,700 grams when my due date is the 12th of february and everybody knows that in the last month they double the weight) i don;t understand why they can do a C section at 39 weeks but they cannot induce me in the same period and they have to wait 42 weeks. Can anyone help me in what do i need to say to doctor to let them induce me at 39+? i don;t want to go under C section in here as i know already i wouldn't be able to stand up or walk with the method they use to give you stitches. Please help me!

[Hidden]

Hi bigbump78, I'm sorry that you are anxious and don't feel like your doctor is listening to you.

The official guidelines for an "elective" caesarean section (ie by choice not necessity) are set by the National Institute for Health and Care Excellence (NICE) and are as follows:

If a woman requests a caesarean section because she's anxious about childbirth, she should be referred to a healthcare professional with expertise in providing mental health support to help address her anxiety.

If a woman requests a caesarean section, a planned caesarean should be offered if a vaginal birth is still not an acceptable option after discussions and offers of support.

If the obstetrician does not wish to carry out a planned caesarean, a referral should be made to an obstetrician who is willing to perform the procedure.

nhs.uk/conditions/caesarean...

So if you haven't been referred to someone to discuss your worries then you should ask to be. Ultimately you have the right to have an elective c section but you do have to go through a process first.

I think your best chance of having someone listen to you is to make it clear that you know what the guidelines are and want them to be followed. It doesn't seem that your doctor at the moment is following guidelines.

Hope that helps.

[bigbump78 in reply to Hidden]

Hi Remysgal, thank you deeply for your reply because since i am foreigner i didn't have a clue about guideline and that help as on Monday i will a consultation appointment. Hope with this new information they will listen because i would really love to have vaginal birth or at least i want to give it a try and say that i did all my best to have it.

thank you thank you thank youuu!! have a nice week-end!

[SilkeP]

I know how you feel - I'm from Germany where things are approached differently as well, in particular mode frequent scans and staying in hospital MUCH longer after birth.

I was very anxious having a baby here and on the NHS. I've now had two children here in two different hospitals (as we moved) and I have to say I've had the best care ever! During pregnancy, if you or they have any concerns, you will get checked, scanned extra etc. You can call the unit and be seen pretty much immediately.

Some of my friends have had elective C-sections without problems. After your first you have that right to choose.

And same with induction (I never needed induction or c-section so can't speak from personal experience.). One of my friend's due date is actually today and she is going to be induced on Monday if baby isn't there by that point yet. So at 40+3. I don't think you have to wait until that late.

If I were you Id get a second opinion as in my experience they are actually quite good at listening to you, especially second time round!

[bigbump78]

hi Silke, thank you very much for answering me. Well, although i have been trying to let them understand i don't want to wait there is nothing more that i can do. The consultant wrote down on my green file that i'm gonna have a C section at 40 weeks which i don't want,i would love to have a go with the vaginal birth, and hope on Monday i can sort this out. If dont i am going to listen to your advice and ask for another opinion.

Thanks Again!! have a nice weeken

[roxannacar]

Don't mean to be devils advocate, but if you didn't dilate and they had to break babies shoulder to pull her out, they are probably suggesting a c section because it is safer especially if you are saying you have large babies. I just would make sure you discuss the risks properly as in my opinion having a healthy baby is the most important thing.

[bigbump78 in reply to roxannacar]

well... instead of waiting 42 weeks +6 they could've done the induction earlier avoiding the baby to keep growing (as this is what the baby do in the last months, the just put on weight and grow) they are completely developped at 39 weeks and there is no reason why they can perform C section at 39 weeks + 6 but cannot perform an induction at the same weeks and need to wait the maximum time.

[roxannacar in reply to bigbump78]

But you said that this happened is a different country. Was the baby quite large last time? I mean really arguing this point with me is not of much use as I have no say. I was just stating the point that if they're were such big issues with the previous baby and then had to harm the baby the obstetrician might be worried that you might have the same problem this time round. I was booked for induction at 41 weeks but delivered two weeks before. I don't think they would wait beyond 42 weeks in the uk.

[Lillyella]

Now I wish I was pregnant in another country. I thought 2 scans was normal....

[smallcat]

Hi, sorry to hear you're having problems being understood by the consultant. I'm really surprised to hear you haven't had extra scans at age 37. My understanding was that mums over 35 automatically had extra scans to monitor various things. I'm 23 weeks along, but I live in Scotland so perhaps each NHS area does it differently.

I'm aged 40 and have been given four scans already and will get three more before end of pregnancy. They found low lying placenta at the 20 week scan so partly they want to monitor this for rest of pregnancy to see if it moves up to where it should be.

Keep talking to the midwifes about what you want and perhaps they can advise and get it written in your notes.

Good luck with it all, xxx