Currently at 29 weeks, I will be a first time Mum...can anyone recommend a good book to help prepare me for baba's arrival?

[Cokd657]

I am sure an element of natural instinct will kick in but a book which has some SENSIBLE advice and tips in may help me feel more prepared. Any suggestions welcome! Cheers!

[seh303]

i loved the baby whisperer by Tracy Hogg and am also enjoying The Attachment Parenting Book by William Sears and Marth Sears. Both completely different but really interesting. I read The Contented Little Baby but it was a bit rigid for me. Enjoy xx

[Ance81]

Hi, same as you I am first time mum to be and I have three books I really like reading. When I first fell pregnant this book helped and answered a lot of questions also it explain what happens week by week to our bodies and babys development.

amazon.co.uk/Pregnancy-expe...

This one is really good too

amazon.co.uk/What-Expect-Ye...

And the one I really love and has been recommended by so many mothers, as well it has worked for me in the past ( I am nanny and had few babies I looked after from birth) is the Gina Ford book, so I am hopping I will be able to follow her routine once my baby is ready for it. If you were to get any of these books I would say this is it.

amazon.co.uk/The-Contented-...

[Ance81]

p.s Gina Ford routine might look a bit complicated and full on at first but seriously in my experience it really works. It is hard work at the beginning but so worth it afterwards as it is really easy once baby's routine is establish. There are also support groups you can join and ask for advice etc from other mums that are following gina ford

[Armywag]

My husband bought me this:

amazon.co.uk/Babycare-autho...

It's full of information x

[cheekymonkey3791 in reply to Armywag]

That's the follow on book to the Pregnancy Bible which I loved, is it good Armywag? How's your pregnancy? Still having a section on the 1st Nov? Not long now! X

[Armywag in reply to cheekymonkey3791]

Yes 20 days to go till we meet her eeeek ☺️ Feel fine, just tired as finding it hard to sleep now. It seems like a good book, plenty of info and should be a good referral point. Hope you are keeping well xx

[cheekymonkey3791]

In response to the above...The pregnancy bible was fab, I read it all through pregnancy and have thought about getting the follow on baby care book.

Gina Fords books are very controversial, my friend followed it but all hell broke loose when you slightly changed the routine. I understand as well that its written by a women who has not had children!

I hear the baby whisper is very good too, a few friends have mentioned it to me.

In all honesty my Boy has just reached 4 weeks and feel like been to hell and back at time, no book is going to tell you that!! and you do have to just go with it...the best support you can get it from friends and family. Learn from friends with young children, not all advice will be asked for nor always correct but you'll get it anyway.

Trust your instinct & you'll do what's right for both of you

Best move I made this last week was attending a breast feeding cafe and then onto baby clinic for a weigh in as EVERYONE in same boat & you discover your not going crazy or not coping...everyone feels the same and a great way to meet new people and for your baby to interact too xx

[Cokd657]

Thank you all, I will take a look at your suggestions. I am very much of the opinion that whilst your life will ultimately change with a LO's arrival you should not stop your life and therefore I'm not looking for anything too rigid just a book that has some good tips and suggestions which I can take on board. I'm sure the rest will come with experience, natural instinct and help from others. X

[scoffcat]

I'm 26 weeks, similar position to you as it's my first. I found the Tracy Hogg book Baby Whisperer really helpful - not too rigid, but sensible-sounding advice. It's made me feel a bit more prepared. Hope it works out okay in practice! Good luck! x

[Coeny-em]

I'm in a minority, I hated the baby whisperer. Really made me feel inadequate as a first time mum. Also the bit that says you should sleep when your baby does is laughable!! I found Lucy Atkins "first time parent" really useful and not preachy. I also really like the what to expect...series's. Currently using what to expect..the first year. Whatever book you read, take it all with a pinch of salt!

[DrFluffy]

I took the advice of a friend and didn't buy any. If there was a cute all solution out there, there would only be one manual! Doesn't stop me googling everything and anything though!

The other bit of advice several friends gave me was to avoid Gina Ford books! Being a paeds nurse does not give you the same experiences as being a parent. Xxx

[NanKing]

Absolutely agree with DrFluffy. Expecting my 5th baby and there has been no one magic solution! I did read the baby whisperer before my first and I think there are some good general ideas in it but it has a definite routine too and my experience with mine has been that trying to impose a routine before about 6 weeks is equally stressful for babies and parents. After that point babies tend to develop their own pattern and helping them by building on that pattern feels to me like we are working together rather than I am making my baby do something for my convenience. To that end I have read and loved the Sears books although I am not a complete baby-led enthusiast. I too would avoid Gina Ford like the plague - all I can tell you is that when our local NCT nearly new sale happens there are about 20 almost untouched copies in the book sale... The difference between a professional baby carers perspective and that of a parent who is innately programmed to respond to the physical and emotional needs of their baby is responsible for a lot of pain, guilt and sense of failure in new parents. A carer can care and may do so very well but only a parent parents. What the 'guilty failure' parents are experiencing is nature - making them respond to their baby when s/he cries, when s/he is hungry or tired or needs to be held close because s/he is alarmed or feels alone. What science actually tells us is that when babies don't get this positive feedback to their needs they learn to detach themselves. Babies who are 'trained' don't learn to 'behave', they just learn not to expect their basic needs to be met, which is tragic. Babies who have their needs met ultimately learn to be independent as they have confidence in their secure base. Sorry I know you weren't asking for people's rambling thoughts on parenting techniques but I wanted to explain that I don't just have a downer on Gina Ford or any other 'routine training' manual but I think they can be very damaging to the parent-baby bond. Our local breastfeeding counsellors also discourage using G.F. because it undermines breastfeeding.

[Cokd657]

Thanks all, really good to read all your opinions. Ultimately everyone is different which is great and what may work for one does not for another. I'll take a look at the suggestions everyone has kindly taken the time to make and assess which one may just help me feel more prepared for our LO's arrival. Don't want to use anything as a bible or manual but just help to familiarise myself with some of the basics and let my mothering instinct do the rest! Xx

[fk1953]

I read Gina Ford while pregnant and loved it. Once the baby arrived I thought it was all on a different planet and I don't understand how anyone can be organised enough to do it. I just about keep myself and a baby alive every day, that's enough for me. The book I have found useful since the baby arrived is the essential first year by penelope leach.

[Duchess118]

Hi

I'm also reading a book called Childbirth without Fear.

X

[NanKing]

Childbirth without fear is awesome if you want a book about birth! It's been around for a long while but is as true as ever. For more recent reading in a similar line Ina May's Guide to Childbirth or Rediscovering birth by Sheila Kitzinger are both great reads.