poems that could be newspaper ads

I found this piece from a poetry project I did some years ago, inventing classified ads that might run in our very very rural newspaper in the Western US.

Special Classifieds

(First five words free, $1 each, after.)

Wanted

Good rifle: mine shoots crook’d.

To Good Home

Spouse; will deliver. Football season.

Special Intentions

Hay’s in: Pray for rain.

Parts

Good wheels; dinged up kidneys.

For rent

Dive; perfect for college student.

Reward

Lost wedding ring, near Joe’s Bar.

For sale

Good gelding, $1,000. Naughty mare, free if you can catch her.