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Free Yourself From Fear: Coping with the Coronavirus, COVID-19

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Photo by Fusion Medical Animation on Unsplash

A colleague, Dr Naomi Baum, has written a free booklet, which I will present here, with her permission. It is a 7 day journey, which I will present over the next 7 days. Her website: naomibaum.com

WHAT YOU WILL NEED

Before getting started, I recommend that you get a notebook that will accompany you as you read this book and do the exercises. Any size notebook will work. I personally favour notebooks with nice covers, but that is up to you. This notebook will be your Journal. Keep it near you, as you read this book, so that you can do the exercises that require writing and track your progress.

HOW THIS WORKS

The is written as a seven-day journey. That means that each day covers a different topic. You can work through the book in one week, choosing one exercise from each chapter. However, many of you may prefer to take it more slowly. In order to do that, you may turn each day into a full week, and spend some time over the week doing the exercises, trying out some new behaviors, and reflecting on what worked for you and what did not. There is often more than one exercise suggested. Feel free to experiment. Be forewarned. Not every suggestion here will work for every person. Each one of you is different. Find what works for you.

Day 1. Learning to Breathe

Before diving in to our fears, I want to provide you with a life preserver. This life preserver will give you the confidence to jump into the deep waters facing your fears, and help you float back up to the surface if you feel that you are getting out of your depth and sinking. It is actually quite a simple skill and something that we do every day.

What is it? Breathing.

Why do we have to learn how to breathe? Don't we already know how to do that? We breathe all day and all night long without paying much attention to it. Thankfully. Imagine what it would be like if we had to think each time before we took a breath. So, why do we need to learn to breathe. To answer that question we will do a short exercise.

EXERCISE: LEARNING TO BREATHE

Place one hand on your chest and one hand on your stomach.

Now breathe.

What did you notice? Where was your breath coming from?

You probably answered, "My chest."

Now, if you can, find a baby, and have a look at how that baby is breathing. What is the difference between the way you breathe and the way the baby breathes?

If you cannot find a baby, I will share with you what we know. Babies, when they are first born, breathe into their abdomen. Notice the next time you are around a baby that when the baby breathes its stomach goes up and down. As we get older, we lose that skill and begin to breathe from our chest. This shallow breathing means that we do not fully fill up our lungs. As a result, we take more breaths that are less effective at re-oxygenating our blood. When we experience stress and anxiety, our breath becomes even more rapid and shallow, and thus, even less effective.

A hallmark of deep relaxation is taking deep breaths, bringing the breath all the way down into our stomach or abdomen. Deep, mindful breathing can quickly restore a sense of calm and relaxation. It is an instant de-stressor.

Let's try another exercise.

EXERCISE: MINUTE OF MINDFULNESS

Place your right hand on your chest and your left hand on your abdomen. Close your mouth and try to breathe in through your nose. If you have trouble breathing through your nose, open your mouth slightly. Bring the breath as far down as you can. Hold it for a moment or two. Breathe out slowly through your mouth.

Let's try that again. Breathe in through your nose, and out through your mouth.

Many people find it helpful to count while they breathe. Each one of you will find your own pace, but initially, try breathing in through your nose to the count of four, holding your breath for a moment or two, and then breathing out slowly through your mouth to the count of six.

Repeat.

Notice as you are breathing how you are able to bring the breath into your belly. Place your hands on your belly and watch them rise.

Now do it two more times.

The goal of this exercise is to re teach your body how to breathe deeply, and intentionally. This will cause a relaxation response in your body and often works much better than saying to yourself, "relax," or "slow down."

HOMEWORK

1. Practice breathing daily.

2. Choose two times during the day that you will set aside one minute (60 seconds) to breathe.

3. If possible, close your eyes, and take four complete breaths, breathing in through your nose and out through your mouth.

4. If you prefer counting, you may count as you breathe. Alternatively, you may choose two words to say to yourself, the first word for when you breathe in, and the second word for when you breathe. For example, you can say "in" and "out", or you can choose any other set of words that you like. "Soft" and "belly" are two other favorite words to use as you breathe in and out. When you breathe in and say soft, imagine your body softening, and as you breathe out and say "belly", imagine your belly relaxing.

5. When you finish taking four complete breaths, notice how your body feels. Notice how you are feeling.

6. Record your progress in your Journal. It is helpful to set up a chart for the entire week that looks something like this.

DAY TIME OF DAY 1 TIME OF DAY 2. No. of BREATHS COMMENTS

SUN

MON

TUES

WED

THURS

FRI

SAT

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johnsmith profile image
johnsmith

This will leave a mental mess. I have quickly read the book. Breathing comes in many different ways. Some types of breathing creates anxiety. Some types of breathing leads to mania followed by depression. What is suggested could raise someones fear and anxiety through the roof.

It was hastily written making assumptions that what worked in another setting will work in this.

PhD psychology is problematic. This is because it is extremely narrow and has been obtained in a silo.

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lupus-support1 profile image
lupus-support1 in reply tojohnsmith

While you are entitled to your own opinion, I don’t think your reply is helpful or necessary.

Those of us who are qualified as mental health professionals have spent many years training and many years working with people who need help.

If you don’t find this helpful, that’s OK, but others might.

Be well’

johnsmith profile image
johnsmith in reply tolupus-support1

I have met many survivors of mental health professionals. Many mental health professionals do not know how to accurately record data.

I am not going to argue about whether some may find this helpful. Some may. Those are not the ones I am worried about. I am more concerned about those who find doing what you suggest destructive to their mental health.

In statistics there are those who are within 1 standard deviation of the mean. Then their are the outliers who are 3, 4, 5 and more standard deviations from the mean. In a small population the outliers are unlikely to exist. In a very large population (people accessing the internet) the number of outliers become substantial.

Much of mental health psychology is based on WEIRD psychology. Psychology developed from access to the University undergraduates. WEIRD stands for (W)estern (E)ducated (I)ndustrialised (R)ich (D)emocratic. WEIRD psychology is a psychology that could be accurate for 4% of the worlds population. For the other 96% their are other psychologies which are accurate. These 96% are outliers in the psychology tests done on university undergraduates.

Many mental health professionals have blamed non-compliance for things not working. And record it as such. It never records the issue that the patient tried it and found it destructive and so abandoned it.

The nature of many mental health professions is that they develop belief systems as a result of training and the taking of exams. They then fit their clients into these belief systems and not record information which runs counter to their trained belief systems.

lupus-support1 profile image
lupus-support1 in reply tojohnsmith

Trauma affects people in different ways. Some people ruminate ie have the same thoughts going round and round. Other people become very anxious, frightened to the extent that they have physical symptoms, such as panic attacks.

Other people become agitated, argumentative and even attack those who try to offer them something good.

As I have tried to explain to you. You are entitled to your own opinion and beliefs but you are not an expert in trauma nor are you an expert in mental health.

More pertinently is the impact your posts may have on people who might find this programme helpful.

You have stated your opinion so there is nothing constructive in continuing this discussion. I would just add that perhaps you may find it helpful to talk about the issues you have mentioned in your posts because you sound very angry. However, this is not the time or place for your concerns.

With good wishes,

Ros

Hi Lupus-support1, I add my appreciation to that of Jerry and agree that there is some overlap between this great advice and the mindfulness of breathing technique I’m presenting inThe Quiet Corner. Always happy to collaborate and co-operate so we don’t tread on each others’ toes. Good to meet you!

lupus-support1 profile image
lupus-support1 in reply to

Good to meet you!

lupus-support1 profile image
lupus-support1

Thanks should go to Naomi Baum. Part 2 later.

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