Toilet accidents ?

[rachelthomas]

Hi l have been adviced, accidents can happen whilst out and about. Would I be wise to carry spare underwear, wipes etc. Trying to be prepared and allow my husband his dignity post surgery. 

Thank you in advance

Rachel x

[patchworker]

Hi Rachel, He probably won't be going out and about much at the beginning, so he'll have a chance to find out how his body works at home first.

I've needed the loo urgently at times, but never had an accident, just a tummy ache.

Good luck

[Aussiepete]

Dunno. I've not had any of these. If he's continent now I'd imagine that he'll be continent after.

I think all of us suffer from bouts of tummy issues. I suffered terribly during chemo, post op I developed lactose intolerance which was not pleasant. These all settled down over time and I'm now mostly under control.

18 months post op I'm still learning what I can eat, when I can eat and what combinations of food 'work' and those that do not. Also the mantra of little and often comes into play. If I muck up any of the above and end up too full or full of the wrong stuff I can need a quick trip to the loo.

Having been to my first OPA support group yesterday and seen my first cohort of post op patients I am starting to realise how unique each of us and our experiences are. A gentlemen who is post op 25 years appears to be still learning ! 

My advice would be to wait and see. He will be in hospital for a while, once home he will be mobile but wanting to be relatively close to home. You can learn what is required.

when I was first diagnosed I contacted the OPA and spoke to Larry. He was amazing and really helped me calm down and understand what everything was going to be like. Perhaps contact the OPA directly? Also, the magges centre in Charing Cross hospital is a good resource. Who is your surgeon? Ask him for more info. In fact, make sure you get all of the info you need from him.

The OPA support group I attended yesterday was excellent. The organiser (David?) and presenter (Majod?) were brilliant. One of the things discussed was the benefit pre op patients would get from attending...can't agree more highly.

Good luck guys. It's daunting and I was scared going in. But, I'm genuinely happy with my circumstances post op, there are still bad days but they are fewer and further between.

[haward]

Like other posters I have felt the need to locate a toilet quickly but I haven't had an accident. Have you spoken to the OPA and got your husband a toilet card? They are on 0121 704 9860.

I have travelled extensively since my operation three years ago and in many toilet free zones including a 200 mile car journey across the Gobi desert and a four hour trip up the Amazon. I have been lucky.............when I got to the research station I was staying in on the Amazon I spent three very loose days, which didn't stop my ventures in the rainforest but made things a little anxious. I still don't know what it was because usually these are one off events and it's never happened again.

[brucemillar]

Rachel

I never had an issue. My surgeon was confident I would not as they are not touching anything down that far. He will learn what he can eat very quickly. 

Good luck. 

[Beatrice90]

Hi Rachel, We are all different it seems! I have had these incidents and I do carry wipes and tissues with me and also a spare pair of nicks in a plastic bag. Thankfully these incidents are happening less often, I am 64 and 2 and a half years post op. From my point of view it can happen after eating too much and going out too soon (I find it's best to rest for a while until the food has gone down), or too many carbs (often bread with me) or too much sugar (one time it was triggered by a milkshake and a piece of cake). Strangely,  I'm fine with chocolate though! It will be trial and error to begin with. This site will be a great help to you and also any OPA support groups that you can attend. Good luck. love Angi xx

[SteveJ]

Be prepared Rachel,  it's better to have things like that with you just in case and they wont take up too much room, and if it turns out you didn't need them all the better.  It really is about having confidence at first when you venture out, I was really nervous about it at the time but luckily I never had an accident.

Kind Regards 

Steve

[tallbear]

Hello Rachel,

As the operation looms closer and closer ...3rd of May I think you said, you and your husband are bound to get worried about what to expect and how your going to cope and all of those sort of things, it's natural.

There are quite a few companies on the market who sell incontinence pads of one sort or another, and I was really taken aback to find that I did need to have these post surgery and I had never had a problem before.  I think as with everything else you wont know until you come to it. I like another of my friends keep a supply for those just in case moments, mine because of a digestion problem with SIBO and diarrhoea which I am hoping will soon be resolved with antibiotics.

I am one who started out being able to eat sweet things, but now I can't eat any sweet things, pastry, bread or biscuits and no chocolate or sweets. Although a month or so ago I could eat all of these things. It's a bit like a lottery really on what you can and can't eat and if you are going to suffer incontinence or not. If you do suffer incontinence it's normally short term and linked to other issues.

As for post op eating etc in truth it will be weeks before he eats anything of any consequence, a week with nothing at all and then just jelly type foods followed by fork mashable diet and then finally back onto a more normal intake, but all will be in small amounts if you want to avoid the pain of dumping etc.  So chin up and tell your husband to gorge himself on his most favourite foods and drinks whilst he still can, I'm seven months post op and just dream about the sort of food I want to eat, if I actually eat it I have to spend a couple of hours in pain recovering.

Keep your fingers crossed that you will be one of the lucky ones who can go back to normal eating.

Good Luck and best wishes to you both

Richard

[brucemillar]

Rachel

I think I am correct in saying that I am roughly the same age as your husband (I was 57 when diagnosed and through surgery).  I was otherwise fit & healthy and like your husband have a beautiful loving wife who worried more than I did.  For me, I was a passenger.  I had to get through it.  I kind of sat back, listened to what the doctors told me would happen and then just went for it.

Whatever you go through at the time is all over and almost forgotten very, very quickly.  It is akin to learning to ride a bike.  You have a scrapes and tumbles alongside frustrations, but you stay alive and when you do eventually stay upright all is forgotten as you set off on your next journey.

What I was told at the time was " we are not above your throat or below your stomach" So none of that changes.  That is largely what happened to me.  Within three days of surgery they were trying to get me to eat ice cream and have some cold drinks.  Within seven days I was able to manage a cup of tea (heaven).

What is staggering is how quickly your own body adapts to its new plumbing, without you doing anything different.  Yes there were accidents.  I was sick a few times when I tried to take too much food at once or when I would bend over after eating.  But I do not recall any need for spare pants (anymore than before surgery ;^))

Within ten days I was home and wanting to do everything that I used to do.  It was a challenge understanding my strengths and weakness, but nothing more or less.

After three weeks I had my stitches out and could have a shower.  At this point I never looked back.

The occasional set back with well documented things (you will see all that on here).  But these were minor in the greater scheme of things.

I am now eighteen months post op and back working full time in the City,  playing golf and enjoying my new healthier me with a reduced waist line.

With you at his side he is going to be just fine, frustrated, angry, annoyed and a bit sore, but fine.

Good luck.

Bruce

[rachelthomas in reply to brucemillar]

Thank you for your reassuring reply Bruce. My lovely husband is 62 and has always  been my protector, suddenly the tables have turned, and l have to take the reins for a time. I am trying to be prepared for every eventuality to support his recovery, and am afraid of letting him down.

I know he just wants to get through surgery, and toward a future.

Rachel x

[brucemillar in reply to rachelthomas]

Rachel

Your words on here show that you will not let him or yourself down.

I sense that he is lucky man to have you on his team.

Get through the surgery by focusing on the recovery that he will have.  Trust me here.  He will start to notice that every day gets a bit better and things get less scarier.

My wonderful wife was my rock through every single step.  I dread to imagine what I would have done without her.  Eighteen months on we are now managing to have arguments again, so life is returning to normal.

XX

[gutlesswonder]

Hi rachelthomas

It would be a good idea to ask your Husband's surgeon what he proposes doing with the Gallbladder.

If the answer is 'remove it' then almost certainly there will be serious continent problems.