My second day is over. Im happy with my achievement. but somehow I think I've been very boring this evening. I feel like an alcoholic that's given up drinking. As though I can't have a conversation, be myself or even function normally without my cigarettes. That just sounds so sad!
My husband was chatting away with his glass of wine, having a smoke, laughing. I was just there and not joining in. Just boring!
I'm looking forward to,getting over this stage so I can enjoy life again.
But hey, I've done another day!!!
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It will get easier Becky once you're able to stop thinking about it so much. The first few days are always hard because we're missing something that's always been there to fall back on.
You know there are cigarettes in the house as your husband's still smoking and that you could easily have one if you wanted to but try to remember that it's your choice not to smoke anymore.
I felt a bit lost when I first quit but I just tried to convince myself that I was gaining rather than losing something because that's what we're actually doing.
The days will get easier but you probably know that already because you've done this successfully before. Just stick to your guns and don't look back. You never know, your husband might even decide to follow your lead and give up too but if he doesn't then just you carry on regardless. You've obviously given this quit a lot of thought and now you're on your way.
Well done for getting through today and I hope tomorrow's a good one for you.
That all goes away...I still feel a bit weird at times but it's getting better
I suppose we've been smoking for so long that it's normal to not know how to behave without the cigarettes on our hands
So, answer to you, you say you are boring now.
I say I was cool, very cool with my cigarette in my hand... So cool! That's why I ended up with a recurring and extremely dangerous infection on my lungs and am now trying to get rid of it....and it won't go.
I say now...it's better be boring than walking around with an oxygen bottle because I was so cool!
Xxxx stay strong buddy, you know this is the right thing to do!
We're changing the habit of a lifetime Mmaya but it's been a long time coming for both of us (probably longer for me than you).
For the last 10 or so years I kept my habit to myself - only my husband knew I still smoked and I made him keep that fact to himself. I still wanted to smoke even though I was ashamed to admit it to others. What does that say about me??
I too thought I was so cool when I first taught myself to smoke but I never thought it would take me so long to stop. It makes me really angry when I think about what a fool I've been but it's time to focus on the future - and making sure that smoking is a thing of the past.
It's been hard to come to terms with but I'm getting there now (you are too) and it's a good feeling. x
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Linda, I smoke since I was 12, so that makes 28 years smoking.
I used to be a very heavy smoker, 2 packs a day.
My first attempt to stop smoking was 4 years ago, since then I've reduced the amount of daily cigarettes to 5/6 a day or on really stressful days around 10/12.
It's a hell of a great feeling!!!
I had a great day today, not one craving, was out with the kids for Halloween and one of my neighbours offered me a cigarette... I didn't even feel the need to say I'm not smoking anymore, I just said no, I'm good thanks.
I'm so happy I got here and anyone starting now...it does get better
We're hijacking Becky's post Mmaya but I'm sure she won't mind and reading our posts might give her confidence. If we can do it I think anyone can.
Quitting does do strange things to you but it's so worth it and it does get easier. I feel as if I've been a prisoner to it nearly all my life but now I know I don't NEED it, even though very occasionally I do still miss it but only for a few seconds.
I can't imagine going back to it now and I know I'd be mad if I did. :eek:
Well Becky, as I said to you before, there is nothing nice about the quitting process, it's slow, painful, hurtful, it really tests you and pushes you to your limit...but I guarantee to you that it does go away.
I know every person is different, I'm on day 47, I'm only starting to feel comfortable with my quit now.
Hang in there. Whatever it takes!... Stay strong and you'll be joining our little gang in a few weeks.
It feels great to have gone this far, not because of the obvious reasons but because I'm sick and tired, I'm fed up with failing over and over.
Becky, you've done extremely well to stay off them while others are smoking. It would have been so easy to cave in but you didn't. I'll leave it there for now as I've had a few too many but I look forward to seeing how you get on and hope you keep it up. It's worth it! I love(d?) smoking but I reckon I'm doing the right thing. Hope you do too.
Big thank you to all of you for your advice, encouragement and for sharing with me.
I admit that on waking up this morning my thoughts weren't "well what a clever girl you are for making it to day no. 3". They were more along the lines of " why don't I just have one cigarette, just one won't really make a difference...."
Since I do have such a fear of health issues, I'm trying to concentrate on that at the moment. I think I need to scare myself, so reading about your lung infection Mmaya is really speaking to me.
Linda, I too have been a secret smoker for years now, too ashamed to let my non smoking friends and family know about my habit. It's hard work keeping a secret like that and I'm looking forward to freedom from that too.
Nozmo, I loved smoking too, which is why I'm finding it hard to quit. I have a sense of loss. Very sad!
If you go back to my posts I've gone through hell really scared of the big C. It took them long enough to find out what really was going on and I spent every single day thinking I was dying with cancer.
Even though it was good news, the infection I have is recurring and resistant to antibiotics, it mutates therefore it is very difficult to get rid of it
I'm now struggling with it since January 2015 when I went to the stage of not being able to say 3 words without coughing the brains out.
Thank god I'm past 6 weeks, thats the worst,
after that it's only to keep it up and positive re-enforcement every day,
Becky Welcome and greetings from an Ex South-African... I moved not as far north as you but just over one border into the lovely sunny Mozambique.. Congrats on your quit and reading your day three post see the first signs of that lost feeling or rather the feeling that you have lost something ...Becky that is going to be your worst enemy, that feeling of losing a life long friend and companion...You state that hubby is enjoying his wine and a ciggy and is "happy".. Please remember that happiness a cigarette brings is a false happiness and you must stay strong and make your own happiness..(You will see in my posts I lived that false euphoria for 38 years)
Sorry Becky it is a mouth full but I can just Imagine sitting there in the Cold UK and going through this quit...I am with you in this one and will keep you updated from the Sunny Dry Southern Africa.... Ja..you can take our friends...Linda..Mmaya..Nozmo and I sure Rowens will allso have something to say....."Blabbery" to heart and enjoy them. They are all lovely and helped me a lot on my journey Strongs !!
Hercu I am just SO jealous of you sitting in the African sunshine.
However one has to be a dedicated smoker to continue the habit through the winter here :). It's COLD!!!
Smoking has become my Life long friend and habit, yes I do miss it. I have used it to celebrate, for comfort, as a pain killer, a friend when I'm lonely or sad, to combat hunger pangs when I diet, a tranquiliser when I'm anxious. Yes, the list goes on and on. So I'm sad and there's definitely a hole in my life at the moment.
I'm still feeling determined though in spite of all my negativity.
Ah Hercu and Becky, I was biting my tongue for the last few days and excited for you both to meet being from the same part of the world....Becky, take everything in this man posts as he is a huge inspiration to all of us here.....
You're so right Mmaya, it's no fun trying to smoke in the rain and wind. And yes, I always felt sort of guilty if I smoked in a public place, felt like everyone was looking at me..... I started getting quite paranoid. As for the price, well, I darent even think about all the money I've burnt.
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