Really struggling to kick this habit!!

Hi everyone, I'm Emma.

I really need some help. I'm feeling really unusually low at the moment and smoking is just fuel on my fire. It doesn't make me feel better, it makes me feel worse but yet I can't seem to reason why I need to stop. I feel like I'm forcing myself in to something by smoking or quitting, and I just want to go back to feeling healthy and smoke free.

I stopped for almost 4 years then started again in december last year when I had my heart broken. After 8 weeks, I stopped again but recently started again as it was all I could think about. I was smoking anything from 1-5 a day, then I crashed my car and it's become a daily regular habit. I feel chesty, lightheaded and I hate the taste. My teeth are hurting and my breathing is suffering. I have a great singing voice and want to sing more than anything, and that's starting to feel affected. Yet I still can't seem to just get up and put on patches. Every night when I go to bed, I think to myself, "Tomorrow is the day, I'm not gonna smoke." Then I get up and have a cigarette after breakfast, thinking that one more day won't hurt. I find a reason not to, such as work or my car being written off.

I feel embarrassed that I need to go and get patches and help again for the 3rd time, which I know is just ridiculous. I often feel peer pressure too, that other people smoke so I can as well and that my friends won't like me if I quit because I keep trying and failing to quit and I'm not as sociable if I don't smoke. I feel totally spaced out in my mind, too.

I really need help to quit this awful habit!!

4 Replies

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  • I hear you Emma, this is my 3rd time now at trying to quit and I'm back on day 1, I too kept putting it off and putting it off but today I had none in when I woke up and am refusing to go to the shop. I find this forum is a fab place to be as we all support each other and we have all made the same excuses at some point. You haven't had an easy time and that has made it even more difficult for you xx

  • Emma I really really know how you feel! Most of us here have had multiple attempts to quit - you're not alone in going for patches for the 3rd time I can assure you. This forum is a lovely supportive place, and if you have a browse through the threads you'll find so much wisdom and help. Just being here and reading/talking about it made my quit so much smoother, I'm certain. It's never easy, and you need to fight and fight, and keep being strong. But you can :) You just have to make a start. One minute at a time at first, and as the time passes you'll be so pleased :) x

  • my lovely your at a great place, knowing you want to quit is half the battle, one step at a time, and as some lovely person on here pointed out to me youve done it once you can do it again, indeed for me at least keeping close to the forum, makes a huge difference.

    its our crutch in life, but i now understand if we take that crutch away, we wont fall, we will flurish,

    look forwarto your up dates, stay strong. do this for you. as we all know smoking is not social. its nasty and smelly

  • EJY welcome to this lovely forum......It surely worked for me and helped me to understand why I had that terrible feelings in the first week of my quit.....

    I was feeling good about the fact that I was not the only one in the world suffering but there are thousands, millions out there suffering to quit this terrible addiction...

    Stay strong and stay with us and you will discover life again smoke free.....!!!!

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