I'm 35 and I've been trying to quit for a long time. This time, I've gotten further than ever.
I'm clean for 2 weeks now and the physical/chemical cravings are totally gone - but replaced by a weird feeling of emptiness. The psychological addiction, just "missing it" is very strong.
It's hard to explain. Smoking was such a big part of my life and I am only realising that now: it made driving enjoyable, traffic jams bearable, trips to the pub with mates better - it punctuated and enhanced my day in numerous imperceptible ways.
This time quitting feels different - I already know I'm never going back to cigarettes. I *get it* now. I understand that it was an addiction for addiction's sake - with no benefits other than fuelling the cycle of addiction.
So, feeling good about quitting, but weird and empty: what do I replace smoking with? What's the point of my day to day existence? It's like smoking was a hobby that's left a big gap.
Thanks for reading.
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I know exactly what your saying it's quite normal to feel something is missing!!!! Addiction of any kind is hard to break, particularly the fact that you have smoked for years and years probably?
It certainly does take some time to adjust, but it can say looking back now that at some point you will realise, that you maybe have not thought of smoking for a hour or so, those moments become longer and longer.
You have a great start, please post and read often it's a huge help. Do any thing , eat, have sweets, anything just don't smoke, it will get better it will
Yes, I have that feeling and it is a challenge.... it does take a while but as Tracey has said, the 'feeling normal' times get longer It's a kind of 'new normal' - I read and surf - this takes my mind away from these feelings - deep breathing - anything other than take a puff.
Must say, it's also a lot of extra time to fill.... with wonderful non-smoking things...
I think most of us here can relate to that feeling. It does fade, honestly! I'm nearly three months quit, and I can't remember a time recently when I've wished I could have a smoke - the hole filled up without me realising, I think. Stay strong, and it's nice to meet you x
That empty lost feeling is something I think we all go through, it's almost like bereavement but it does ease with time. I remember being close to tears with those strange feelings of loss in the early weeks. I go days now without thinking about smoking but some days that lost feeling comes back today is one of those days for me, I feel very jittery and anxious and I could quite easily give in, I won't though because I know tomorrow I'll be fine again.
Just wanted to thank everyone in this thread for being so supportive. I've not given in and it's pretty strong craving right now, just out of boredom, something to do..
I am staying strong and its thanks to some of the things said in this thread. Thank you x
Welcome, I am also new to this site, I am on day 10 so you are a little further than me, when the urges hit me I get on line and read posts, that and refresh myself with Alan Carr has also helped, I know if I keep going this feeling and cravings will not last forever but it seems a world away from where I am now, need to stay strong, writing about it to all the wonderful people on this forum fighting for the same thing is really helpful. I am not in the same timeline as the rest of you so the posts I read are not live they are 12hrs before but there are a lot of people posting so I don't feel ever alone, keep posting we are united 😀
It's probably one of those things that's different for everyone, I guess. I fear I'm going to tie myself in knots trying to explain myself, bear with me!
So, I occasionally miss smoking, just occasionally. But instead of feeling sad and empty about missing it, I'm glad I miss it, because if I'm missing smoking, that means I'm now not a smoker, which is exactly what I wanted! Yes, I'm a 'glass half-full' type, I suppose, and I look for the positive in everything. Doesn't work for everyone But the 'missing' moments are getting fewer and farther between.
I also use those moments to remind myself just how nasty and addictive tobacco is - if I can, (nearly) three months since my last smoke, wish I could have another one, that just proves how addicted I was/am. And I'm sane, so I KNOW that tobacco did nothing good for me at all. And yet still I wish I could smoke sometimes? Well, no! Not me, but the addiction, that little monster inside. And that's not me. I am the woman who took control and booted nicotine out. And any time I feel like I 'want' to smoke, I stop and think, and remember that no, in fact, I don't want to at all.
I'm rambling now. It will get better, xjack - keep reminding yourself that by not smoking, you are getting what YOU wanted.
Incy is so right by not smoking you are doing what you want not what the nasty addiction is telling you to do. I don't know why we miss smoking so much when we know how bad it is for us, would we deliberately do something we know for sure will cause us a great deal of harm, of course not, but still we grieve for something that shortens our lives and costs us a fortune to boot. Crazy what addiction does. What your feeling now will fade, if these feelings lasted for life no one would quit smoking yet thousands do, so there has to be a light at the end of the tunnel. Just keep strong you can do this
I´m familiar with what you describe xjack. The missing moments. The pleasure associated with smoking or making something that is mundane pleasurable. I´ve been on a beach in southern Spain today, enjoying the sea, the music from the chilled bar, the salad I had for my lunch, the sunshine on my skin. But looking round the beach seeing people smoking. Over the last eleven weeks I haven´t really been envious of others still smoking, but it has crossed my mind today how having a cigarette, enjoying one like these other people are, would make my experience even better. Then I come to my senses. Fine for a while, then it comes to mind again. It´s almost as if all of those lovely things I list earlier are not enough. I keep wanting something more, where in reality I have enjoyed my day without smoking. My friends are smoking and I haven´t, and I´m very happy about that.
Walkabout we started this for a reason. I'm the same today, smokers make it look so enjoyable and carefree but they are smoking and feeding their addiction at that point. Ten minutes later they need to do it again and so on. I am really struggling right now but I know it's a trigger to pull me back to exactly where I don't want to be. May the force be with you my friend ( I'm drunk obv)
Yes, definitely may the force be with us. It´s weird how we (I) can forget those reasons for quitting. I went for a run - easily not my best or most enjoyable run, but I would not have been able to do that if I was still smoking. It is easy to forget those reasons. My physical health was dire, okay, there are people in much more difficult circumstances than me, but it was bad enough and getting worse, year on year. A cocktail, or a beer, lying on a sunbed, dipping into the sea, and chatting with people here and there; what a delightful day. Yet the smoking monster drew me to those people having a drag, and yes you´re right, 10, 15 minutes or a half hour, having another. Another no smoking day under my belt. A little bit stronger.
Our memories are short I think. We look at smokers with envy sometimes but have forgotten how bad and weak we felt as smokers, I know I hated myself for being so addicted to smoking, I certainly wasn't a happy smoker, I felt more and more disgusted with myself with every cig I smoked. I have to remind myself of that whenever I think I would love a cig.
Yep, right Spanish, and those people I was observing were probably thinking as used to, and still can from time to time. I'm impressed we are not smoking!
Yes, I can certainly relate to that feeling of weirdness. I found that I was experiencing the full range of emotions instead of the flatness that smoking would give. I found that strange feeling was helped along by doing exercise.
I'm just over 10 weeks clean now and I still feel bereaved, I know it's ridiculous but it's how I feel and it's great to know that I'm not the only one who feels this way. The urgent cravings have gone, I can eat a meal without immediately wanting a fag afterwards and I can drive for quite long journeys without even thinking about it but the days do seem quite long, I need to find something to do to take up the time that smoking used to.
I have a big test ahead of me this week. I have an overnight for work in a hotel. Bored, on my own, and getting a bit stir-crazy in a hotel room. The temptation will be strong. Already feeling like I've given in when I haven't! Sounds so silly. I'm clean and getting better every day, I need to cope with these blips.
It's a big change in our lives, giving up smoking is massive. Like we've identified, every activity was punctuated with a fag. Now think, it was punctuated because we had to smoke, we craved a cigarette because our nicotine levels were low. We didn't finish something and have a fag because it felt like a good idea, we had to smoke to fulfill our junkie brain with nicotine.
It does feel like a loss, yes, think about it, we are not smoking, we have spent years and years feeding our habit, of course it's going to feel wierd for a bit, but remember, feeling weird isn't difficult, just different. It is no where near as difficult as a cancer, COPD or amputation.
Gosh, I gave up smoking 6 months ago, and sometimes I think I could do with a fag, but believe me it is not even an urge, just a thought. I smoked loads, found quitting really hard, but am so glad I've done it.
Just remember, you no longer are a slave to smoking, timing your next fix. You can attend a training course, fly long haul, babysit without being in withdrawal.
It's good out there, and no, you aren't missing anything, unless of course, you like wasting money x
What a great thread all the posts above. Most of us have the same feelings or have passed a little beyond them. And, we are still not smoking. And that is the bottom line. No matter how much grief, worrying, reduction in self-confidence, feeling insecure in our quit. All of us are still here doing it. Marvellous, it really is.
3) Write about how it happened/how it made you feel/what you can learn from it and keep your writing for next time you're tempted to jump off the wagon...
4) See 1 and 2
5) Use the feeling of lowness to fuel your resolve. We're all behind you x
I just need to understand how long it's going to take for the urges to get out of my system. I feel like there was nothing left (chemically) but something about the situation, being a bit drunk, made me want to do it - and as soon as I took a drag I knew I was making a mistake and that it was pointless addiction for no reason... I just need to get past that bump and I know I can do it. Nothing since that night (Tuesday night) so I guess I'm resetting the clock: back to 1 day. :/
Hey Jack – The good news is you tossed out most of them sticks, and you got back up on the horse, so well done!! Don't beat yourself up about whats happened, consider it a trial run and try to learn something from it. Just make sure you keep trying - and never forget all your past successes in your last quit, those hurdles that seemed un-doable at the time. They are equally, if not more powerful in helping you go forward than a few short comings. Go, fight, Win!!!!
You're so right. Had a few thoughts today about buying some but just tried to remember hard what the taste is like - gross - and the smell on my clothes and in my car.. eughh. Plus if I'm *not* addicted now, why get through the gross taste just to get addicted again!?
I found not buying the things was the only real battle I had. Once I'd got past the shop/out of the petrol station without buying any, I was fine and didn't want to smoke at all! But man did I have to fight, sometimes, just to stop myself asking for tobacco at every counter...
I agree with Incy 100 percent, it was my biggest battle by far and still raises its ugly head once in a while - but It does get easier to manage and it feels great to walk out of a situation like that with a big smile on your face. You can do it!!
Another day clear. Resisted 2 serious chances to buy a pack today, and am stronger as a result. Meal out with the GF tonight to celebrate and take my mind off it all.
I know how you feel xjack I went for 4 months without a cigarette until last month when I caved because of alcohol. Now I'm back to day 8. Quit isn't too bad this time except yesterday while I was hungover.
Jeez.. 2 months on and it's been a rollercoaster. Stopped and started a few times. Last quit was 10 days ago - caved today and bought a pack of 10. So angry with myself. Can't seem to get past that 10 day mark.
I know the nicotine has gone, so why do I still feel so addicted after 10 days!?
Jack the nicotine leaving your body is not when the withdrawals end. It just means there is none left in your system - your body still physically craves it.
Also you can use the lost password form to get your old account back - or message a mod maybe
Nice to see you back posting again, it's really difficult to do what we are doing and I am so happy that you keep trying, that's the most important thing once you stop trying that's when you have failed, Sami is right if we only needed to get through the time it takes for nicotine to leave our body it would be easy peasy but it's not, your body still remembers it's last fix and like an elephant it never forgets, sad as it is, it will always be with us but as time goes on not as frequent and that's the stage we are aiming for, keep trying buddy you will succeed, we are here for you
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It's a kind of 'new normal' - I read and surf - this takes my mind away from these feelings - deep breathing - anything other than take a puff.
