Hello month 2.

[nsd_user663_63090]

Phew! I stopped on November 24th and the last few days have been tricky. I feel like I've been playing mental ping pong with Auld Nic. It's my first month, my first holiday and my first Christmas and it's a battle of wills. 'You could just go and buy a pack of tobacco for Christmas,' Nic says.

'Yes I could, couldn't I? But I won't,' I reply.

'Yes but it will only be a few and then you can pick up where you left off,' he says.

'Go away!' (That's being polite).

This game of ping pong keeps playing in a loop and I'm thinking that each time I win the point, Nic's getting more and more out of breath and tired. Hopefully he'll give up and leave me alone soon.

Happy addiction-free Christmas everyone! (Still can't do a smiley)

[Sally6]

Congratulations Betty on your first month completed. When I was where you are, I had the same battles as you which I found exhausting. It gets better, Nic will re-appear from time to time but he'll gradually bother you less and less. Keep on winning your points against him. Hope you have a happy smoke-free Christmas.

[nsd_user663_59644]

Hello and happy xmas, your game of ping pong will pass, it's just a few moments of time,now normally we don't think of time but we do when we are quitting you are doing so very well indeed, be proud and happy , just keep resisting, one foot in front f the other. You are so strong, brilliant.

Well done from me

[nsd_user663_63090]

Thank you both. Just feeling as if I need some encouragement just now. I'm happy that I'm not smoking but I'm still at the stage where I'm missing it. Does that seem odd? It's wrapping presents and then not smoking. It's having a drink to celebrate and not smoking. I guess they're all firsts and getting through all of it will make me stronger. This all started on Friday when I broke up from school for the holidays - I'm a teacher. I'm good at keeping myself busy but, at times, I feel there's something missing which is just daft!!!!!!

[Sally6]

Betty it's not daft at all. Reading your posts, is like reading about my own quit. Every day which passed I was pleased with myself but at times it was a real battle just to get through the day. At times I thought I missed smoking so much I was in tears, which is daft. Just get through a day at a time, or an hour if you need to and somewhere along the way it will get better.

[nsd_user663_63090]

Thank you Sally. I'm on the hour at the time at the moment!

[nsd_user663_63090]

Thank you lovely people. Have a lovely Christmas! Gorgeous frosty sunshine here this morning so I'm going to head down to walk on the beach before the festivities start properly! X

[Sally6]

What a lovely start to Christmas Day. Don't have a beach near me but we're just off out to take the dogs over the fields for their Christmas morning walk.

[nsd_user663_60964]

Can't think of a nicer way to start Christmas Day Betty. Such a perfect morning for it too!

A Very Merry Christmas to you and many, many congratulations on you starting Month Two. It WILL get easier, I promise. You'll have those 'doldrum' times but they will pass and as the others have said, every trigger-point you successfully surmount will be one you will never have to deal with in the same way again.

All the best to you from me and may your day be a perfectly splendid one.

[nsd_user663_40405]

Betty Mac Boo's doing the do, keep it up!

[nsd_user663_63090]

I'm still doing the do and still going do-lally! So, this morning I sat down and made a new reasons to stop list. Right at the top is that I can breathe properly. The wheezing disappeared almost immediately and I'm not going there again. Jeezo! After visiting this forum, I'm wrapping up well and heading back down to the beach to fill my lungs with lovely freshness. My lovely sister bought me a nutribullet for Christmas so I'll buy lots of good stuff and fill up my body with vitamins. So why on earth would I want to undo all of that? My rational brain tells me it's the dumbest thing in the world. But hey, I'm 50 next year and rational sometimes doesn't come into it, if you know what I mean! But I'm going to fight it and kick that little blighter to Kingdom come. Also worried about going down to lower patches on Monday. Need to plan lots of busyness! I'm almost end the end of week 5 and this has definitely been my very own week from Hell. Onwards and upwards etc etc!

[nsd_user663_57918]

Maybe it has something to do with the Christmas period and that in itself has triggered something. I have had some tough days and since yesterday my brain has been at war. Sometimes I think too much and am much better 'doing' rather than thinking. A guy on another forum wrote a list to read to himself when he found himself debating. On his list he wrote how many he smoked a day, ect

25 a day

15 puffs per fag

375 puffs into our lungs every 24 hrs

175 fags a week

2625 puffs each week

which equals 136,500, that's OVER one hundred and thirty six thousand times I have inhaled smoke in a year

No wonder we had a wheeze

and to top it all we were chasing a dream/illusion because each puff was making us want the next and the next.......

I read this back to myself and realise why I want to be free.

You need to read your list (and this one) and you need to read it properly. Concentrate when your reading it, don't just speed read or skim it and read it again and again until you feel quieter.

The other thing I'd like to say is we all feel different for a while as we are leading a different life so don't let Auld Nic say ''your not the same anymore'' because you are the same and you are going to feel so free very soon and that feeling cant be beaten by anything.

I hope your feeling better xxx