Fell asleep earlier and just woke? Good grief, now I cant get back to sleep (its 3.27 am) and I musta been tired. Mind you I did wake around 8am. Im annoyed that my sleeping pattern is up the left for sure. Has anyone else found this troublesome? And when does it get better?
The good news is that I joined a gym today. I actually went out to get my wee doggy daughter a new bed and some nibbles etc. The gym was next door so I called in and got a showing round the joint which let me see all the facilities. Jacuzzi/Swimming pool/joga and circuit training studio/main floor with all gym equipment etc. Signed up there and then, had a bite of lunch while signing up and went home with my purchases.
Also on Friday I had a real bad craving day right in the pit of my sternum I felt like something was missing. I ended up doing some deep breathing (to be honest it nearly felt like a panic attack - if that's what a panic attack feels like - I dunno). That passed and then about a couple of hours later I had another bad craving and felt like I wanted to smoke again. Called into a local shop on the way back from Portrush (local seaside town - about 40 miles from where I live) went to look at the sweetie and chocolate aisle and found that it wasn't even that that I was looking for. A drink was purchased and I ended up getting comfort from the bubbles of the soda going down the hatch. Was I thirsty or was it a craving I ask you. Hmmmm. Phewwww. Please be informed though, at no time did I think of purchasing cigarettes, thank God. I ended up talking out loud and saying, "theres no way I have come this far and gone through all of that to give up smoking now!"
Hence the joining of the gym today. At least I have something else to focus on and the reward of buying that membership is pleasing. I didn't give in. But i'll tell you, those few hours where I would have loved the sea air and a puff was a trying time and a memory in itself as it was something that I used to ......enjoy. hhhmmmmm really Paula (wind your neck in)
It just goes to show you though, even though I thought I was over the worst back then when I was just 5 days into my quit and in the worst ever mood, I never thought I would have experienced another bad craving day this far on.
I do so hope it gets easier.
Hope my mood improves soon.
Breathe free and stay safe