Made it to Day 17..... the days are blurring... but i'm counting. Thank you Mr iPhone.
Triggers are usually there now when my OH is upset with something, either with me or she's just not happy. These ones are hard to address.
Work-wise triggers are few now, and can be managed.
Alcohol triggers can still be very risky, so I have to rehearse in my mind, many many times before taking a sip.
But I really don't know what to do with my OH, dreading getting home now from work, but I have to get home, because I have my night calls and meetings to do from home.
It's starting to feel like what pro atheletes advocates, rehearsing in my mind, visualizing what I want to happen, when an event triggers.
Will she be in a better mood ? If she's not, can I still pull through ?
I'm a positive person by nature, usually have more than enough positivity to spill over and support important people in my life, but during these few initial weeks, truly have my mind full just dealing with this addiction. None left for others. Or is it nicodemon saying these words again ?
Sorry, rambling, my junkie brain going into overdrive. :eek::eek:
I have to tell myself that no matter the external environment, people, things that I cannot control, the only thing I can control is my response to these external events, upset bosses, people, work related stress etc etc.
Need more time for this quit to mature. If I fail this time, I would be a total emotional wreck. :eek:
Having said that, I have never, ever, gone 17 days in my 25 years of smoking life. It truly is a strange place to be. Uncharted waters.
Thank you all, and hope you have a good one !
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Hi Edged, sorry to hear you are struggling a bit. I can empathise with all the feelings, looking back I realise I was looking for an excuse to smoke, for stress or to calm down etc. It will pass...now that I'm into the second month I'm much happier and calmer and the triggers are less.
I'm sure some much longer quitters will be on soon to tell you that it gets even better with time.
Hang in there I'm positive it's worth it in the end
Firstly, and most importantly, you've reached Day 17 which is a fantastic achievement- well on the way to a whole month under your belt now- and you've faced off loads of triggers and awkward moments. Everyone here knows just how much courage and determination that takes and you have it in spades so well done you!
Secondly, I'm sorry things are a bit sticky with your OH at present. Probably you're on a shorter fuse than usual even if you haven't noticed it and your OH is picking up on that, and also I think that it takes both parties in a relationship to adapt a bit when one partner goes through a life-changing event (such as quitting smoking). It can make things feel odd, off-kilter, even threatening to the other partner, even if the other partner doesn't smoke. In other words, it'll take a bit of time for things to form a new pattern and fall into shape as far as your relationship goes. I'm sure you and your OH can work things out.
Just off-load to us whenever you need to Edge, because we're always here (and there ain't anyone here who won't understand).
Good to hear from you with an update, and the bottom line is that 17 days is nothing short of UTTERLY AWESOME...You get me?!!
To me, your post speaks that you hold a good awareness of the different dynamics that are going on, and quite frankly, you can't do more than that. Unfortunately the hard thing is that awareness or understanding of something doesn't mean we can get round the thing - we still have to get through it....which is what you are doing, one day at a time.
I concur with Skidders re OH - in effect, you're shifting an entire foundation of your being (like earth plates moving) so all those near and dear are going to feel it and react to having to adjust. But as you know, change ain't a bad thing - we just have to ride the storm.
Hang on to your quit, mate - we're all rooting for you and enjoy this miraculous achievement
I just went to bar, downed a couple , a lill tipsy since I seldon drink nowadays, and got back home to in time to continue my night calls aka work.
When I left the bar, I was sooooo tempted to drop by 7-11 to pick up a pack, draw one, and call it quits.... but I didn't.
I think I need to go back to basics.
Day 18 will be feel like Day 1, because essentially, I may have to relearn some of my lessons again, in the 1st week.
Really appreciate all the comments.
Still have 90 minutes to go before work ends, and I can go zzzz.. maybe wake up in time to catch Netherlands vs Argentina in the World Cup... but long as I'm home, on fags @ home, at least I'm a home run today.
So very well done on your quit. We are hanging in there.
Sorry to hear you and oh are having a tough time, I guess talking to each other and being open and honest is the way forward. Maybe you need a date night and a bit of romance
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