Some sort of head calibration is needed to move me forward.....
I need to stop thinking in terms of "giving up", since this vocabulary is about sacrifice, and start thinking in terms of gaining something.
Because I remain steadfastly in "giving up" mode, in my head I am a martyr, making sacrifices, I'm a sufferer, a victim, not a winner....
I am stuck in the belief that I am giving something up with not only NO tangible benefits, but rather with a great deal of misery attached to it :eek:
In my mind I am approaching this quit as if I've made a deal with some nebulous power, and daily I await my reward, I think this would be something approaching a euphoric joie de vivre,
and daily this doesn't happen, the grind of self-denial (which is how I realise I see it) goes on......so I feel like I'm keeping my part of the bargain and being let down by??? Lord knows who or what! It feels unjust so I am daily wondering why bother......this is nothing but a thankless task!
So - it is obvious, I need to re-calibrate my head
How I do this, I have yet to figure out but since insomnia has kicked in today, I shall take advantage of the peace and quiet of the night to TRY FIGURE IT OUT :mad:
M
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Interesting.....when I was toying with quitting couple of years back I bought this book, so have a copy.
I haven't picked it up since I actually stopped smoking since I kinda thought you had to be a smoker whilst reading it otherwise it was no good - I remember the instruction that you could smoke whilst reading it appealed to me at the time :eek:
Glad I just typed the above cus "ding dong" a bell went off in my head - at the moment I am a smoker who isn't smoking, rather than a non smoker, I'll dust if off in the morning, and read the amazon links tonight!
I've read allan Carr twice since not smoking Mina...he really does make you realised that there is no sacrifice here and you are not giving up anything. As soon as deprivation sets in you are on the back foot. Give it a read you will feel better for it. Xx
I've read the book while smoking and re-read it last week while not smoking. I found it helped just as much both times. I did not get the euphoric I'm a non smoker moment BUT it was another piece of the jigsaw for me.
I think there are many reasons why we smoke and each one has to be knocked down before you can be happy/content with your decision to quit.
I think what I failed to realise in previous attempts is that smoking doesn't just disappear from your life. I woke up this morning and got told :
time to light a fag by my brain.
I grinned because thankfully I didn't have to, pouring with rain and blowing a gale in my garden!
It wasn't a craving just an old memory blowing through and because I know this it doesn't have any power to make me smoke.
Why don't you list the reasons why you think you want to smoke and start working out which ones you haven't knocked down yet.
Hi Mina, sounds like you are already getting that positive mindset as you are questioning what are you actually giving up? Giving up as you say is sacrificing something, depriving yourself of something, Karris point is so spot on and has helped me in this quit, when we lit a cig it really wasn't because we wanted a cig it was because we were replacing the withdrawal of the last one....I read Allen Carrs book in 2008 I reckon I need to read it again, but not until we have finished Appletree Yard :D your doing great lovely, nice and steady wins the race xxx
Read something last night that helped me as a short term knock that crave on the head strategy
Basically
So, you want a cigarette?
Let's say you give in and smoke - in half an hour, guess what? you'll want a cigarette.
Whether you smoke right now, or you don't, you'll end in the same place, wanting a cigarette, so you might as well not smoke and want it, as smoke and want it
And the bonus is that not smoking breaks the circle, and moments like these disappear into your history
Mid way through day 19 - which, when I make it, will be the furthest I have ever made......I thought this day would NEVER come and now look - here I am!
As I belt out "I'm on the Edge of Glory" at the top of my voice around the house, I have to wonder if I am peaking a little early tho :D:D
Enjoy the good days, you're clever enough to know that there might well be more bad days BUT this proves to your brain that you can have good days as a non smoker and that is invaluable. Once that sinks in more and more, you'll start to wonder why you bothered
Mid way through day 19 - which, when I make it, will be the furthest I have ever made......I thought this day would NEVER come and now look - here I am!
M
And that really IS something to celebrate! Now you've made it through your psychological glass ceiling you'll be storming ahead I'll bet.
Read something last night that helped me as a short term knock that crave on the head strategy
Basically
So, you want a cigarette?
Let's say you give in and smoke - in half an hour, guess what? you'll want a cigarette.
Whether you smoke right now, or you don't, you'll end in the same place, wanting a cigarette, so you might as well not smoke and want it, as smoke and want it
And the bonus is that not smoking breaks the circle, and moments like these disappear into your history
Have a fab weekend all
M
x
I love this!
Yes
Mid way through day 19 - which, when I make it, will be the furthest I have ever made......I thought this day would NEVER come and now look - here I am!
As I belt out "I'm on the Edge of Glory" at the top of my voice around the house, I have to wonder if I am peaking a little early tho :D:D
M
And I love this! the sense of achievement you will get when you pass that 19 days is wonderful, I am so glad you are back to feeling happy Mina I love your posts xx
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