Depression - I don't know what to do

Hi everyone, I have been feeling quite depressed lately. Personally I don't think it's anything to do with my quit as its been on and off since early this year - before I even decided to quit. I've had some good days in between, but on the whole I'm pretty depressed and I haven't yet spoken to anyone about it, although I did mention it briefly to my hubby this weekend.

I think I may see my gp when I get time as I'm quite worried now as a few days ago I started thinking that I don't really want to be here. Before anyone panics - I'm not suicidal as I wouldn't do that to my family - I think it's so selfish. I'm just really sad and I don't know how to fix it. I don't want to tell my family or friends as I feel weak and I don't want sympathy from them and I don't want them to worry about me as that will make me feel worse. All I feel like doing is curling up in a ball and crying, but when you have kids that's not always possible.

Has anyone else been through something similar? Any advice? Sorry to burden you on here but I just don't know what to do. Also it's hard to figure out whether this is related to my quit (I'm 10 weeks in). I just want to be myself again - I'm normally a really cheerful, positive person.

Thanks for reading this.

Sarah

31 Replies

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  • Aww hun, I know the feeling!!

    (hugs)

    I'd definitely mention it to your GP, they will be able to help you and in the mean time do as much as you can to feel better. Know it isn't easy but it is do-able :)

    But you're definitely not weak, and please don't think of it as being that!!

  • Thanks Gemma! (hugs right back at ya)

    I should also mention that I do not have any desire to smoke at all - so this is a positive sign I guess

  • Thanks Max. I'm not sure if its quit related because it started earlier this year a few months before my quit started (before I had started thinking about quitting).

    One thing I do feel happy about is that I'm free from smoking and almost free from nicotine.

    I started crying when we got our new car last week because I couldn't bear to part with our old car. How silly is that!!!! All I could think about as we drove off in our shiny new car was how sad Volvi the Volvo (yes she did have a name) looked when we abandoned her for a newer shinier model. Perhaps it's my own insecurities coming out in case hubby does the same with me (for a newer shinier thinner model who doesn't cry at the drop of a hat)!!

    I know it's weird me writing this on here for virtual strangers to read, but it is actually cathartic to get this out!!!

    Sorry everyone!!!

  • Hi, Sarah,

    As Max says, don't rule out that it isn't due to your quit. The last time I quit, I had depression really badly which is why I stupidly went back to smoking 6 months into it...& the depression went away! This time round, I'm ready for it with my new weapon (which I don't stop banging on about) Look at natural supplements as the serotonin levels in your body have taken a battering due to smoking...the depression (& mood swings that can occur) is a sign that they're trying to fix themselves, especially once the initial euphoria of the fact that you've really quit wears off. I suffer very badly from the mood swings & have been taking Rhodiola liquid extract for the last 2 weeks which has been an amazing find...not only has it improved my moods (I've even managed to cope without smoking through 2 bl00dy earthquakes) but my energy levels...which has helped me start to lose weight (bonus).. Someone else, Kat I think, has taken Rescue Remedy & swears by it so there are alternatives to suffering until that particular phase passes.

  • Hi sjt, I'm so sorry you're feeling so low. It's really hard to scrape yourself out of that kind of feeling, it's like a big smothering blanket of sadness that just flattens you and saps all your strength. I've had that feeling - although mercifully short lived - and I know a lot of people on here have suffered from depression. You're not alone.

    You really should get to your GP as soon as you can. They are best equipped to determine whether there's an underlying cause, and they can help you find ways to deal with it. Don't suffer in silence!

    Really hope it passes soon.

    H x

  • Your troubles sound similar to my bad times Sarah, and if it's any help I'm more or less OK now - unless there's a reason of course!!

    Won't bore you with the details :p but had some bad times around a month or so before I quit - during which I smoked like a crazy woman and actually am glad I did 'cos it didn't help one little bit - got through the post-quit teariness then got very down around the 2-3 month mark.

    But I do think it's a good plan to see your doctor 'cos they can definitely help, definitely don't let it sap you 'cos it's horrible to go through!!

    Not wanting to smoke is fab though :D

    Ooh and don't apologise hun, that's what we're here for!!

    xxx

  • Thanks again everyone. It's even making me teary reading your kind responses. This is so not me. Yes I cry in sad films - even kids ones, but not usually at times like this! Kindness is supposed to make us happy so why does it make me cry!?!?

    Anyhow I will try see my gp as soon as I can. My girls break up from school a week tomorrow and there is so much end of term stuff (plus both their birthdays) to do with them first! Stressed to my eyeballs (and I don't even work - ridiculous isn't it?!?)

    Hope everyone else is ok and I really appreciate all the friendly, kind messages.

    Sarah

  • Hi Sarah,

    I suffered from depression a few weeks into my quit. The doc put me on antidepressants and I spent the worst 8 weeks I can ever remember. I was taken back off them and started a co**** of vitamins recommended by a friend who is a herbalist. Vit B Complex, C, D, Cod liver oil, Potassium, zinc and copper. Within a few days I was back to normal.

    Hugs

    Una

  • Thanks Una. One of the things preventing me from seeing my gp is that I don't want to go on tablets. They scare me.

  • Thanks Una. One of the things preventing me from seeing my gp is that I don't want to go on tablets. They scare me.

    Don't be scared hun, some tablets are bad, others really help!!

    Anyway tell your GP that :)

    Also, try St John's Wort, 5HTP and the thingy Sophie recommended

  • Lol, Gemma...tho I have to say, I don't do tablets either...which is why I'm quite happy taking my thingy ;)

  • Lol, Gemma...tho I have to say, I don't do tablets either...which is why I'm quite happy taking my thingy ;)

    Mine made me feel like the living dead - not good times!!

  • Thanks Una. One of the things preventing me from seeing my gp is that I don't want to go on tablets. They scare me.

    Glad you are going to see your GP. I don't care for pills either - but if it helps you then there is no shame in having to take them. I had to once for a few months just to dig me out of the hole I was in. Not smoking has sent me through some waves of depression and I am hoping eventually those feelings will go away. Your story of crying leaving your old car behind - I did the same thing the last time I bought a new car. I was leaving behind my 12 year Volkswagon, for a brand new Jeep. It was a horrible. I can still see my Volkswagon being left behind. I like to think it is just because I am a compassionate person. Sounds like you are too! :)

  • My cars always have names too. And to make it sound even crazier - I drive it for a day or two before I give it a name. Got to get to know it's personality first. NOW THAT IS CRAZY! :p

    Max - we need more compassionate guys here in the U.S.!!!

  • Max - we need more compassionate guys here in the U.S.!!!

    Not just the US - we're desperately short of them here too!!

  • Max - Don't let all of this over-inflate your ego. ;)

    Sarah - I hope you are smiling reading all of this. :D

  • Sweetpea, this is Cornwall, round here they're like a White Christmas - a romantic myth!:rolleyes:

    Round here they're like Santa, a story parents tell their daughters but they don't really exist!!

    *Cries*

  • Puts a virtual arm around poor exasperated,sobbing lady and says "You will find your Prince Charming Gemma,he will appear just when you are not looking" ;)

    XX

    I hope so!!

    And Prince Charming gives me a fit of the giggles at the mo :p:p:p

    xx

  • Eh? :rolleyes:

    It's a very long story Max!!

    Just think about My Big Fat Disney Chav Wedding and you might get the idea

    *Starts giggling*

  • If you are giggling-for whatever reason-that is a good thing :D:D

    Has to be!!

    And hell, it's hilarious :p

    Would be sleeping too but had a long nap earlier and can't get off now :/

  • Well I cannot hide in the nick all night,better go out and look for baddies :)

    Night Gemma and keep smiling ;) XX

    Nighty night :)

    Go get some bad guys :D :D

    xx

  • Well I cannot hide in the nick all night,better go out and look for baddies :)

    Be safe out there Max. Good Night Gals and Guy!

  • Hehe thx for the messages, they did give me a much needed giggle this morning! I'm glad I'm not the only one naming cars and getting sentimental when they go!!!

  • Hehe thx for the messages, they did give me a much needed giggle this morning! I'm glad I'm not the only one naming cars and getting sentimental when they go!!!

    Glad you got a giggle hun :)

    How are you today? xx

  • I'm ok thx. I had a bit of a cry last night and then fell asleep. Feel a bit better today just a bit frazzled as I'm running around like a headless chicken! Don't know quite how I had time to work a full time job as well a few years ago!!!

    Just got news that my sister-in-law and 3 year old niece have been run over - both will be ok thankfully - but that brought a sense of reality back and I gave myself a kick up the butt to stop wallowing and get on with it. I don't have it bad at all so I will start counting my blessings and try be a bit more positive.

    Thx for all your kind words I really appreciate them xxxx

  • Crumbs, glad to hear they're ok!:eek: Yep, something like that does help put things in perspective, doesn't it? But that doesn't make how you've been feeling any less real, go on, make that appointment and just have a chat - it can't hurt and it could help :)

    I will Kat, I do need to get it all out, but I also need to stop being selfish for my family's sake. I have been wallowing for no real reason. Perhaps I have multiple personalities?!?! :D this is positive, slightly happier me talking. Tomorrow who knows who I will be!!!!

  • All of my cars to date have had the same name. I call them FEC.

    The 'E' stands for expensive.

  • All of my cars to date have had the same name. I call them FEC.

    The 'E' stands for expensive.

    Hehehe :D:D:D

  • Hey Sarah - I was just checking to see how you are doing. I know you were having a difficult time and I just wanted to remind you we are all here for you! I tried to send you this message on your profile page - but I am just not familiar enough with how this whole website works - so I better just stick to the forums. :p

  • Hey Sarah - I was just checking to see how you are doing. I know you were having a difficult time and I just wanted to remind you we are all here for you! I tried to send you this message on your profile page - but I am just not familiar enough with how this whole website works - so I better just stick to the forums. :p

    Hey Melzee, thx so much for your message. I had a bit of a breakdown on Saturday morning but since then I am so much better!!! How are you doing?

  • Hey Melzee, thx so much for your message. I had a bit of a breakdown on Saturday morning but since then I am so much better!!! How are you doing?

    I am doing good. The past few days I have felt really good and not smoking has not been a huge struggle. I know all of that could change tomorrow but right now I feel really strong. I am happy to hear you are having a good week. Everyone needs a good breakdown every now and again. I do hope you still go talk to someone. Sometimes you just need to vent to someone who does not really know you or anyone around you. Stay strong and be happy - you nonsmoker you! :D

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