Out of the shadows and into the light

Morning/Afternoon/Evening All,

So - I've decided its time after a couple of smaller posts to throw myself out there - I'm now on Day 15 - so this must be some sort of serious quit. :D

I've had moments - I've even went to the shop - bought a ten pack, got home, placed one to my mouth and then had a very severe word with myself and put water on them. I mean - what was I thinking - all my hard work could have been undone! :eek:

Truthfully, the above both delights and scares me - delights because i pulled through without lighting up even when I was so close; scared because it shows how quickly I could break this quit.

The thing that is getting me the most is the "just one" thoughts - they are constantly there - and I mean constantly - its like having a split personality - am i hearing voices in my head - too right I am! :eek: Its almost like I am trying to justify having a cig - things like "you quit on a whim and didn't really enjoy your last cig - so have just one final one now and that will be it". BUT I know that will not be it - it will lead to another and another and well, you guessed it, another.

I really want the mental war to be over but I think thats a way off yet - I have won the week long "Battle of the Physical" - now I need to place the long game, the attirional "Battle of the Mind". Any tips people?

Thanks for reading what must seem like the ramblings of a mad man!


9 Replies

  • Repetition leads to habit.

    Your repeated smoking during your life lead to that habit and your mind believed it to be normal.

    A repeated habit of not smoking will eventually result in your mind believing that not smoking is normal.

    You ingrained the smoking habit all day, every day, for a number of years. You have to give it time to ingrain the no smoking habit.

    It does happen though. I'm 15 days from 1 year quit and the only time I think about smoking is when I'm on this forum!

  • Hi Chris

    I guess by your number of posts that you've quit before?

    I was exactly the same at the start of my quit.

    My junkie talk was on overtime at volume 11! :eek:

    Constantly bombarding me with the thoughts of "you didn't really want to quit", "you smoked rollies..they're not bad for you!", "you never used to breathe it that deep anyway", "you only smoked half a one then threw it away"..... all kinds of crap to be honest!

    As Capitan says, I believe my best healer is going to be time.

    The volume has dropped already and I'm not paying overtime so the junkie is on short hours! :)

    Another thing to try is exercise.

    I did 20 miles on my bike yesterday and felt brilliant afterwards.

    Plus whilst your doing it, the only thing you think of is cycling itself...it's a fantastic release from yourself...if that makes sense.

    Anyway, take it easy and try to keep busy....or asleep :D

    Take care


  • Thanks!

    Thanks Captain and Nifty! Appreciate the wise words.

    Yep - I have quit before - for 18 months and then I slipped - and boom, I was back into it. Tragic as I wasn't having any cravings or even thinking of smoking anymore! Not going to beat myself up about it however - what is done is done.

    I know what this takes and its pretty simple really - Not One Puff Ever.

    Simples as the meerkat would say!

  • Repetition leads to habit.

    A repeated habit of not smoking will eventually result in your mind believing that not smoking is normal.

    It does happen though. I'm 15 days from 1 year quit and the only time I think about smoking is when I'm on this forum!

    Chris, we're all different. However we are all aligned to a common goal. We will encounter different characters through our posts and that's ok, differing views from this forum help as they create balance. My views are personal to me, and I choose to share them in the knowledge that they might help some, and will not help others. In the same way some views from others will help me in my quest, others won't, there's no right or wrong and it's a personal journey.

    So, some views will resonate with you, others won't. Some tips will work, others won't... and I think you'll know from reading them which ones are which for you personally.

    My personal view - I think Capitan's right here. At the start I made a decision not to smoke, it was a conscious choice. It's more of an unconscious than a conscious choice with every day that passes and as my quit progresses, I'm now on day 39 and I still expect it to be the same choice for day 40 tomorrow.

    If I'm struggling I'll look at some posts here, or go for a brisk walk, remind myself of why I'm quitting and meet my demon with abject defiance.

    I'm sure you'll find some stuff that resonates with you, you have my and everyone else's support, good luck!!

    Capitan, you're almost a year in and I respectfully doff my cap to your achievement, fantastic. I'll see you in the penthouse with Chris and the other members of the Christmas Conquerors in due course sir.

  • As my sig says, when it comes to silencing the inner voice, the secret is repeated conscious choice....


    Keep your chin up and keep going. You're doing great!


  • Well done on 15 days Chris! The others make a valid point, a repetitive action of not smoking soon becomes the norm. I found the Allen Carr book quite good for helping to tackle the Inner junkie voice, but it's not for everyone. Stay strong x

    Karen x

  • Wow Chris, bUying a pack then pouring water on them, that is brilliant, you should view that as an achievement , I don't think I could be that strong welldone!!!

    Im on the same day as you it's getting but better still find myself saying just one .... But we all know that just one isnt going to be just one.

    Hang in there bud,

    Think of how well you have done soo far if your like me around 10 a day kinda chap, you have saved over £60!!!! Around 160 cigs not smoked!!!!

    Don't think you will never smoke again just think not today etc ... You can do this, please don't give up! I want to see you in the penthouse with me!;) plus I might need you to help me soon!;)xx

  • Never give in to that whining voice ''just one'' We smokers have never just had ''one'' it was always followed by another ''just one'' minutes , hours or days later , no matter how long it is it will come and keep coming until you quit and stay that way... I was reminded of myself when i read this thread . i poured water on many packets of cigarettes until the penny dropped. there is no such thing as one, and more importantly the thought of one is better than having one . It never tastes or satisfies like you expect it too. its like trying to recapture lost youth. once its gone its gone. theres no point in botoxing it all. its far better and much more fun to just let it go and grow old disgracefully and happilly. as far as smoking goes im a complete loser and a total failure im finally happy to say i just dont see the point in holding on to it. quit while youve still got the ability to breathe and i promise you will be over the hard bit which isnt that hard, quicker than you think. use this forum to get you through craves and all that . trust the wisdom of those who have gone b4 and beleive u can do it . because you can and will.All the best

    Mash x

  • Got rid of the E cig yesterday, It started to make me feel really sick, It did help in the first few days but I think my lungs are saying a big NO! to any kind of smoke. A good thing Im sure but what to do with my hands?

You may also like...