Nearly Caved In

Day 16

I have come so close to chucking the towel in today. Feeling low, tearful and as if I've lost a friend in smoking even felt as if I'm losing sight of my own identity. My stinking thinking though is a good sign that the nicodemon is using everything in it's dwindling arsenal to draw me back in - close run thing I can tell you.

I read this on another forum:

If I have "Just One" I'll be back where I started. Where I started was Desperately wishing I was where I am today!

How true is that?

I need to put more educational effort into this quit; reading around today has helped me get an understanding of what I'm up against with nicotine withdrawal. It ain't easy.

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  • Day 16

    I have come so close to chucking the towel in today. Feeling low, tearful and as if I've lost a friend in smoking even felt as if I'm losing sight of my own identity. My stinking thinking though is a good sign that the nicodemon is using everything in it's dwindling arsenal to draw me back in - close run thing I can tell you.

    I read this on another forum:

    If I have "Just One" I'll be back where I started. Where I started was Desperately wishing I was where I am today!

    How true is that?

    I need to put more educational effort into this quit; reading around today has helped me get an understanding of what I'm up against with nicotine withdrawal. It ain't easy.

    AAAH York it isnt easy........ it isnt easy at all. It is doable though, but you need to keep that resolve, and the mindset that yes, there are withdrawals, but I dont want to smoke and I dont want to be back where I was. Pappy H said something along the lines of " if smoking was so great why did you want to quit?" I used to say that to myself when the going got tough! You will be fine you will stick with this quit because it is what you want I know and you know it! Keep on keeping on!

  • Thanks for that Haze and for the Pappy H quote.

    This is doabel.

  • Hang on in there it is Sooooo worth It:D

    What keeps me going is " I want to NOT smoke more than I want to smoke".

    Good luck;)

  • Day 16

    I have come so close to chucking the towel in today.

    But you didn't, and I don't think you will. You have hit a low, but you know going back to smoking is not your answer. It isn't easy- but other people just like you and me have done it.

    I have had a couple of bad wants over the last few days. I have not found it as hard as I thought I would up until the last few days, but I have definitely been thinking about smoking more this week....and I have thought,"Well I'll just have one .What harm can that do?" I know only too well that " just one"after a 15 year quit led to another 15 years of being hooked. So please don't take that route.Be strong. You've done brilliantly.

    I am going to pinch that quote you read on another forum and remember that.

  • Poor York. There are hard times and tricky days for sure. I'm so glad you got past this one. You did EXACTLY the right thing.....you read and learned and got through it. I promise you.....you are NOT going to always feel this sad about it. Pretty soon you really wont care very much. I'm telling you that as someone who used to be Mrs fags.....Mrs smokey....Mrs tabs. New day tomorrow York. All is well x

  • Hey hun! Its got trickier for me too today as the days gone on, the monsters really being quite needy!

    Dont give in to your monster.... visualise what it looks like.... talk to it... tell it off... be clear to it that its not going to win!

    We can do this! Your not on your own, the nicotine monster is frightened of strength in numbers..... xx

  • Thank you everyone. The support is so valuable particularly when self-pity has a grip.

    Off to bed now with another smoke free day under my belt. Tomorrow will be here when it's time.

  • Nice one, York!

    I am with you on Day 16. So congratulations! And yep with me also the addiction is amazingly, incredibly wily and manipulating. It'll make me believe absolutely anything at all as long as that belief will make me light up.

    Way to go for seeing through those ploys!!

    You are smart, you are strong, and you deserve this!

    So just go ahead. Take it one day at a time, and claim that prize that nobody but you can award yourself.

  • Stay strong you can do this - I usually also waiver around this time and have just 1 and find reasons to do just that - you will get through this :)

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