I'm on day 5 today and up until this point I genuinely thought I was over the worst (naïve, I know) By now the nicotine has been flushed from my body and all that’s left is to retrain my mind.
I concur with other posters that stated: this week has been the longest week of my life. Without a shadow of doubt it feels that way right now. Add to this, work commitments have been tough this week which I did not expect nor prepare for and today it hit me for six! :eek:
Yesterday was tough with the odd monster craving but I felt good by the end of the day just for merely getting through it. This morning though, upon arriving at my desk all of those feelings from the previous day came flooding back to me with the power of a tsunami and I very nearly internally combusted! The raw emotion drove me to stand up and walk out of the office before I made a scene. I'm not referring to frustration or anger here, but pure emotion.
My colleague must have seen my face or my body language because he followed me out of the office with every intension of having a chat and making sure I was ‘stable’ again before re-entering the office. I am not a particularly emotional person by any means, but I literally broke down! This is not me at all.
We went for a walk outside for a good half hour and we talked. I did mention that I was in the middle of my quit and that I’d felt irritable through the week but I did not expect to feel emotional too. I’ve probably only shown tears to my wife of 11 years perhaps once.
Anyway, after talking it through I feel a weight has been lifted from my shoulders and I'm now in a much better position to soldier on. Also I never appreciated what great and supportive people I work with every day. I am still blown over by my ‘episode’ but It has helped me realise that smoking can have quite a grip on your psychological state as well as the physical effects.
Thanks for reading.