New week - new perspective!

I am now on day 9 and my god this week is better than last!!

I'm not really a cryer but last week I burst into tears on numerous occassions feeling lost, lonely, pointless and without meaning to sound insesitive; depressed!

I hadn't planned on giving up smoking and so I felt my struggle was more complicated (more mind games) than the quitters who no longer enjoyed cigarettes, but were compelled to do so. I LOVE (D) smoking and planned on giving up when I wanted to start a family... so not anytime soon. Not the case at all probably, but I was VERY woe is me!

I had decided though that during the first week I would allow myself to wallow in self pity and by the second week I would need to get on with life.

I sobbed into my carpet for the last time at about 9pm Sunday evening and when I woke on Monday morning I didn't allow myself to think, I just went straight to the gym before work. Then I went to a fun class at the gym last night. Then, I went to the gym this morning, and Im going to another class tonight.... I am replacing one obsession with another!

I am starting to see the positives of giving up smoking for the first time. Mostly by researching the many ways I can spend the money I am saving...

£45 so far in just 9 days... by christmas I will have saved myself about £250!

I have told my mind that I am incorporating my quit into a 3 week detox plan I started yesterday. To be honest, I find I am craving a chinese almost as much as I crave a cigarette - which to me, is great, as a full-on detox means visible results quicker (i.e healthier skin, hair and a slimmer waistline). And it wouldn't be a proper detox if I still smoked! I have also ordered some yoga dvds which should arrive tomorrow.

I very much suppress my feelings and quitting smoking somehow uncovered a few issues which I need to address in my life (mainly loneliness - i moved to another town with work) and I am now beginning to see it as a welcome opportunity to make some more positive changes other than just stopping smoking!

Don't get me wrong, it's still hard and I still crave, but it I can see now that it will get better as I find that the days are becoming shorter and I am realising more and more what a pathetic human being I was last week - haha!

I needed last week to feel sorry for myself, because to be honest, with the concentration of a nat, I could barely do much else. BUT, I really do believe that us complex individuals really possess the power to change our emotions and outlook on life - it just requires effort!


5 Replies

  • ahh bless you im glad your over that first week sounded draining just reading it

    glad to see you are posting on here you should join the november group who will give you the closer support as they are all in the same stage as you but again


    regards Carol

  • I think we all go through a period of "mourning" after quitting.

    Good luck with your quit, and well done on reaching day 9!:D

  • Well done on your great attitude and with that will come success.

    Keep it up

    Lillie xx

  • well said Elsie i identify with so much of what you say. It really is better to experince life and what comes our way than to smoke our way through stuff and never benefit from them, we just end up wrinkled and smelly and look like weve been through hell.

    mash x

  • Magic

    Well done cjl_elsie. At the end of your week 2, you're feeling like I do at the end of week 3. So you got there a week earlier. It's marvellous, I'm feeling so much more positive about things. Long may it last for both of us.

    Lisa x

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