Am very proud of myself this weekend.
We had friends around on Sunday night for a chinese and a few bottles of vino collapso.
There were 6 of us. 2 Non smokers, one smoker, one smoker when drunk and 2 (including me) ex smokers. This ex smoker friend gave up smoking 2 months before me. He had been all 'Billy big head' about it all the time saying how easy it is and he did it without patches, gum etc. He had been my inspiration that had kept my looking in the right direction.
We were talking for a while about it and i said that i need to keep my unused up box of cigarettes in the kitchen because that way it's my choice not to smoke them. If they weren't there i'd feel like someone was making me give up and i'd rebel against it.
He didn't quite get my way of thinking but shrugged and asked "How long since you last had a cigarette?"
Me all proud "I gave up on the night of the 3rd of April"
Him "No i mean when did you last smoke?"
Me getting slightly confused "Erm...the 3rd of April. A sunday night"
Him "And you've not had one since then?"
Me getting more confused "Er...no...i have given up!"
Deciding to throw his strange questions back at him.
I asked" When did you last have one?"
Him (very casually) "20 minutes ago" :eek:
Me "Oh S****t, what happened? Why did you start smoking again?"
Him " I haven't, i only have one now and again"
His wife butts in "It's more than that, be honest."
He starts laughing.
I was just too confused to continue that conversation but he then proceeded to rummage through my kitchen until he found my incentive sticks (as i call them), he then went outside and smoked 8 in the space of three hours!
I could so easily have gone and joined him. A few months ago i would have been at the front with the lighter especially after a few glasses of Rose.
When all 3 smokers had come back in, stinking my lounge out with their stale smoke smell i told him thats he's a rubbish non-smoker. He replied that he really admires me. He wished he had my willpower and he looks up to me as it hasn't bothered me at all(!) and i've just changed my lifestyle.
In all it's twisted irony i liked this compliment but i didn't like to tell him, the more he smokes, the more he stinks, the more talking to him is turning my tummy and the more it is helping me not miss my old lifestyle and be thankful for the way i am now.
I got over what i consider a huge hurdle but it didn't bother me at all. Infact i was thankful i didn't smoke and smell that way. Kissing them goodbye was disgusting lol. And i managed to claim back the box and remaining 9 incentive sticks too. (I've hidden them better this time :p)
The next day when i came downstairs i could smell the stale cigarette smell on my sofa where the smokers had sat after smoking in the garden.
Windows open wide and out came the febreeze again after 9 weeks in storage.
PS- Sorry for rambling.