First REAL craving

Hi all,

I'm just having my first REAL craving that makes me want to scratch my eyes out!!! This is abosultely horrible, I know it will pass and I'll be proud of myself but its damn tempting!

Also, a phone conversation with my brother last night didn't really help... I told him I'd quit (he's a non-smoker and used to absolutely detest smokers... he's got used to them in time). His reply was 'you idiot, what are you doing that for?! That's just stupid, you're so dumb'.

Well, Hm. I gave him my reasons - to which each of them he gave a counter argument that right now is looking quite good and not so dumb!

Also spoke to my parents (both heavy smokers) and while they congratulated me a lot when I told them I'd quit on the first day, when I told them it was my 5th day they just said 'oh'. I told them that I expected them to be a bit more impressed because anyone can quit... it's staying quit that's difficult and they just didn't understand how everyday that I don't smoke is a total battle with myself...

I have to admit, the lack of support from my family is quite disheartening...

9 Replies

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  • Sofia, i'm really sorry that it doesn't seem the support is there, and perhaps where you would like it to be most, but don't be too hard on them. Your parents both smoke and when you were smoking it was comfortable, they know it's not clever and by you quitting they may feel a touch conscious about it. Can't explain your brother, given he's a non-smoker, why would he think your mad to stop, perhaps he isn't keen on the attention and praise it might bring to his sister?

    PLEASE don't let this put you off. You are doing a fantastic job, and the thing is, when we quit, to us it is the biggest thing, the biggest effort, all consuming and most difficult thing we've probably every voluntarily done, so yes it is a very big deal, but smokers or non-smokers don't get it! I used to be amazed at the casual well done i'd get when I told people i'd quit, I wanted to scream at them to make them realise how bl**dy difficult it was, but there is no point. You're not doing it for them, you're doing it for you, which is the most important thing.

    Sofia, stick with it, it really is worth it, you are doing so well, don't let this turn your head.

    Lorraine :)

  • Thanks so much Lorraine... The part about getting a casual 'well done' helped as it made me see that no one (apart from the people on here) will see what a massive effort this is.

    I think my brother just likes playing devil's advocate a lot of the time, also, I don't think he's seen what I've seen in the future (my mum and my grandmother both smoke heavily and I find everything about it just so awful) and I know that could just be me... I'll keep trying to visualise myself as those members of my family and hopefully I'll forget the massive craving...

    That was a great reply, and I feel much better already. Thanks again!

  • Hi Sofia

    I am on my fourth day and currently battling waves of craving it is all consuming I know but reading your post has helped me stay focused and determined to just get through today. One day at a time and right now it's actually one minute at a time. Thinking of you and stay strong.:)

  • Hi both, cravings can be all consuming, try to find something to break your train of thought, do something unusual, read something, sing, dance, laugh (laughter is a great one).

    Remember how fabulous you smell, buy yourself a treat with the money you've saved and kick that nasty little nicodemon in the backside. He has no place here!

    Remember, you can do everything you used to do, you don't need that nasty little habit to accompany you, you can do it without it, and you will do it much better.

    One day at a time, it's an uphill walk in the park, not a marathon.

    Lorraine :)

  • Hi Sofia,

    i totally understand what you mean about the lack of enthusiasm from members of your family!

    my mum (a non-smoker and never smoked) could barely manage a 'well done', whereas my older sister (smoker and serial quitter) actually seemed quite put out that i had quit, and just said "ok, lets see how long it lasts" (she has always started smoking again at 3 months).

    But Lorraine is right, it doesnt matter what anyone else says/does/thinks, you are quitting for YOU and only YOU!

  • I can remember when I was still a smoker who really couldn't imagine being able to give up and friends managing to give up.

    I remember it making me feel pretty weak and inadequate and I didn't really want to talk to them about it.... because I knew that I SHOULD give up. I didn't need the guilt trip or want to feel any more inadequate than I already did... so I just brushed over their successes.

    Don't let your family's reaction to your success get you down. There's often more to it than just lack of interest!

    Be proud of yourself.... you have every reason to be!!! :)

  • How gutting for you. My mums actual words were.. 'oh well done, wait til you get to 3 weeks and you'll be smoking again, i'll get you some bacci when i'm away in france anyway just incase.' !!!:eek::mad: I straight away knew she is jealous and by me quitting just makes her feel bad because she can't quit herself. In my opinion that sort of attitude just doesn't wash with me, it's her 'stuff' not mine & with any luck she'll find the strength one day to do it.

    Just be proud of yourself, keep strong, stay on here, post loads, read loads & ignore negativity as that can be a trigger. :)

  • The first week quitting SUCKS!!!!!! It's supposed to. But your doing it!! and your doing GREAT!!!!!! This week is about you and only you. Be selfish and do your best to take care of you. Take a bath, eat your fav food everyday what ever makes you feel the tiniest bit better. It's really unfortunate but your right, the only people that can understand how horrible it can feel is us that are feeling or recently have felt the same. We're all doing this for ourselves anyways so as great as it might be if others eally understood what we are going through, you have to be proud of yourself!!!!!! You should be proud of yourself!!!!!! If you forget what you've accomplished go back and read people from day one again. Then look forward to one month to see how great it's going to feel!!! Chin up!!!!!!

  • wow guys, thanks for the awesome replies... really got things into perspective and made me realise that all of you who are doing really well had to go through the same lack of enthusiasm as I'm having to do through... (some of those comments you've all received were rather harsh tho! If someone told me I'd be smoking again soon I'd be so angry I'd write that down as one of my reasons for quitting - proving people wrong!)

    I took a new class at the gym today called tai-zen and even tho its quite difficult with lots of exercise there were 10-15mins at the end when you just sit/lie down, relax and feel yourself breathe. I was so happy when I took a breath and my chest didn't feel constrained and I didn't smell cig smoke coming off of my hair!

    I highly recommend something like this :) it was a bad day today (the hardest yet) but that end to it just made it all worth it

    Night, and thanks again for the help!

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