Arghhhhhh!!!

Hi peeps

Onto day 13 and not so bad today feeling happy!!

had a slip up yesterday and just feel so cr*p about it! Went to the pub as i do every sunday lovely day sitting in pub garden felt wonderful until i got a craving and i tried to walk away from it and the smokers and went to loo and i was so frustrated i burst into tears in the loo! pulled myself together and went and joined my friends and it started again and i gave in and smoked a ciggie! :mad:

It was horrible and tasted rubbish and just made me feel so ashamed with myself and wanting to kick myself and i went totally irrational and beat myself up over it and had to go home i was inconsolable! today i am a more rational and with it and know it was coz a) i was slightly sozzled b) my friends were smoking as they have always down c) my guard was done and i gave into it!!! But looking on the bright side one ciggie in 12 days when i would have normally had 200+ is good but damn i could have kicked myself so hard yesterday!!! But i won't give in and i keep going its not gonna beat me!!!

8 Replies

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  • oh bum! as long as it was only 1 i think you can call it a slip up.

    it is always the evil drink with me as well, i am beginning to think that the nico monster has done a deal with the white wine monster to drag me down:eek:

    keep strong day 13 is really good and you should be v proud, glad the ciggie was awful and now you have learnt that lesson you will never have another one.

    i choose not to smoke today.

    big hug ((((((())))))))) to you

  • Oh gosh I so hope you can stick with it having just had one - I fell by the wayside a few weeks ago - and I am very very keen to be back in this community - I work and knowing how terrible I felt the first week of my quit I have to time it when I can be off for a good few days at the beginning ( so that hwarted my intention of trying again on 17th July ) - my worst symptom was giddiness / light headed - so I am preparing myself this time with plenty of quick small snacks to eat regularly during the day plus juice for the first week anyway - "they " say I must eat every 3 hours to start with to produce blood sugars - so that's a plan at least.

    I do have to tell anybody that reads this in all honesty when I dropped off the quit I had the same symptoms again !! I felt just as ghastly as I did the first week of stopping - almost like re introducing the dreadful poisonous addictive stuff and my body just said " hell " now you are giving it back to me !! 9 days of no nicotine - and now it's back !!! - so of course reducing the oxygen flow to the brain again - believe me I will remember this fact next quit - will remind myself that if I start again I have to go through similar horrors as the initial withdrawal days !!

    So try and stick with it and look at the one as a misfortunate blip - but carry on the quit for your sake after this amount of time - Peta

  • Thanks Bev for the hug needed that!!!

    Im sure that it will be the only one coz today im fine not having a problem or even worrying about smoking!

    you are right it was that white wine monster and it colluded to get me!! :eek:

    i know why i beat myself up so much coz i know i didn't really want the ciggie and felt such a pillock for giving in!! right think i wont' be drinking so much until i am a bit more stable with not smoking!!

  • Noooooooooooo.... just one = day 1 again :( Least thats how i think it works on here

    I'm so sorry this happened to you, and when your guard was down too, that sneaky beggar :/

    Main thing is, its better to come clean and own up to the blip than to hide it.

    At least you know the danger point now, damn that effin monster!

  • Oh gosh I so hope you can stick with it having just had one - I fell by the wayside a few weeks ago - and I am very very keen to be back in this community - I work and knowing how terrible I felt the first week of my quit I have to time it when I can be off for a good few days at the beginning ( so that hwarted my intention of trying again on 17th July ) - my worst symptom was giddiness / light headed - so I am preparing myself this time with plenty of quick small snacks to eat regularly during the day plus juice for the first week anyway - "they " say I must eat every 3 hours to start with to produce blood sugars - so that's a plan at least.

    I do have to tell anybody that reads this in all honesty when I dropped off the quit I had the same symptoms again !! I felt just as ghastly as I did the first week of stopping - almost like re introducing the dreadful poisonous addictive stuff and my body just said " hell " now you are giving it back to me !! 9 days of no nicotine - and now it's back !!! - so of course reducing the oxygen flow to the brain again - believe me I will remember this fact next quit - will remind myself that if I start again I have to go through similar horrors as the initial withdrawal days !!

    So try and stick with it and look at the one as a misfortunate blip - but carry on the quit for your sake after this amount of time - Peta

    thanks for that advice i couldn't go through all that again it was hell and i have started feeling better health wise so i will keep going!!! i really hope you do it this time peta xx

  • Thanks so much - I want to - have learned such a lot since my first try - kind of know more what to expect which I am sure will help me - it is very very tough and anybody who thinks otherwise is ill informed !! It's that awful disappointment when you fail - almost like an embarassment - but many many people do - and as everybody on here says - get back to it and try again. As for whether you post in Day 1 or not that is not for me to say - just continuing the quit is the MOST important issue in my opinion - good luck anyway whichever Day you are on !! Peta x

  • Hi Windy :)

    Sorry you slipped up yesterday but it happens sometimes

    Well done getting straight back on the wagon

    Love

    Marg xxxxxx

    Hi Peta :D

    Welcome back and well done restarting your quit

    Remember we're all here for you to give help/support as and whenever you need us

    Live

    Marg xxxxxxxxx

  • Thanks all for your support, feeling so much better today did knock myself a bit yesterday but all positive today, haven't had cravings or any problems for the last 2 days so fingers crossed no more slips ups for me!!! :)

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