Day 4!!!

Yay I made it to day 4. Now I'm in the 4-7 category meaning my first terrible three is over :D Hasn't been too bad a quit so far, no major cravings and have found adequate things to do to keep myself busy. My patch fell off yesterday evening so I went to bed a bit earlier and stuck a new one on this morning. I was also making macaroni and cheese yesterday and as I was grating the cheese I thought 'god what a stink' and checked the packaging to make sure it was in date and checked for mould but nope.. it's just that I'm smelling this cheese properly for the first time. It got me thinking about how much I've missed out on with being a smoker. I started at 12 so I've never been a healthy teen or adult. I always wondered why I couldn't get my mac n cheese to taste the same as my nana did when I was a child.. now I know, and last nights mac n cheese was the best I've ever done :D

Mornings still seem to be the worst but I think it's mainly cos I should have some breakfast. I used to skip breakfast sometimes and smoke a lot instead. In the past relapses have occured after the first three days. The nicodemon starts telling me that I've done so well that surely I deserve a cigarette now. Luckily I've played that game a few times before and I know what happens (a few more years of smoking and feeling like crap). I think the message may have finally sunk in. Hope everyone else has a great smoke-free day and remember to eat breakfast :)

Oh and I forgot... last night I was dreaming that I was in a hotel (what's with the hotel things eh?) and there were a lot of my old classmates there. There was also some alien/god guy who I was going out with and he re-floored the gymnasium for me?!? So I was hugging him and thinking 'this is just like that tv program My Hero'.. he was the son of some gods or something (maybe am just having positive thoughts about my boyfriend cos he's been very helpful recently ;). The dream changed a bit later on though cos I had a collection of fingers, seems I was a serial murderer or something and I was wondering about how I'd get rid of them before I got caught. I ended up in some sort of shoot-out and was dodging the bullets matrix-style and an old classmate ran past me with his head on fire, but it was ok cos the fire went out by itself. All in all a sort of X-Men/Matrix/American psycho kind of combination. Odd.

6 Replies

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  • Hi Harleyquin :D

    Well done on day 4 you're doing just fine and already feeling the benefits as well, glad the maroni cheese was nice and tasted like your Nanas used to

    Sorry the mornings still a bit rough for you but it's early days yet and will get better for you soon and it certainly sounds as though the message has sunk in re the demons

    Oh boy you certainly have some weird dreams indeed,the amount of energy you used in that dream would have left me exhausted

    Love

    Marg xxxxxxxxx

  • Hey HarleyQuine,

    Well done for getting the first 3 days out of the way :) Im just starting my 3rd day and I agree the mornings are the toughest time. I don't know the best way to deal with it but I just keep telling myself if I can last until lunchtime then it gets easier from there onwards.

    Good luck and stay strong!

  • go on harley - im with you!

    just bring it, thats all i can say. I stood in a tent last night that can only be described as a smoke pit. It was full of 15-20 smokers and it hit you as you walked in. I thought to myself... this is a bad idea but my mate was in there and i didnt have a lot of choice.

    anyway the whole pub had a lock in, and ashtrays were flowing and I was fine.

    its weird. this time is definitely different. Its all a state of mind.

  • Hi Bman :D

    Great well done you in a tent with all them smokers and you were fine with it so that's a big trigger out of the way for you you won't need to be nervous about that again

    Love

    Marg xxxxxxxxx

  • yeeeeaaahhhhhh - i ve just realised that its day five today - how time flies.

    time will tell if this is gonna be the one. i just need to have faith in myself now.

    its totally doable but i dunno why im doubting myself. its natural i guess.

    just get through this ~"missing something" phase

  • In the past relapses have occured after the first three days. The nicodemon starts telling me that I've done so well that surely I deserve a cigarette now. Luckily I've played that game a few times before and I know what happens (a few more years of smoking and feeling like crap).

    Congrats on day 4. As far as the having a smoke to reward yourself for not smoking I did that sooooooo many times. It would be a repeating cycle for a few months smoke a week or 2 quit a couple of days then smoke to reward myself.

    Letting go of the idea that smoking is ion some way rewarding is an important part of the quit and it sounds like you've got that in place.

    All the best

    Nic

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