Still around

[nsd_user663_2957]

Hi guys

Sorry not posted much, have been reading though. Lots of problems round here at the moment. One of my older sisters has Alzheimers (she started with it at aged 57) (9 siblings of which myself and sister are the youngest), we've been having a hard time of it lately and now to top the lot life has been so cruel, her husband got diagnosed with it yesterday. We knew he was getting bad but thought it was the stress of looking after my sis etc etc. Her daughters have been told they are likely to get it too so you can imagine what it's been like.

Anyway to cut a very long story short, I blipped on Saturday night and had ONE puff,:eek: it was horrible, and then I cried all night for doing it. I have not been near another since, so not taking that into account it will be 4 weeks tomorrow since I had my last full cig (and only had that one the whole day). I hadn't smoked 2 days previous to that but went from my last full one.

Hope you all forgive me as I'm having a hard time of it this week (I could kill one) Plus couldn't get any patches from the chemist as she was busy and wanted me to wait over half an hour, I find they dismiss you because you're getting something for free and think you should wait till they're ready (it only takes a minute to sign the form). haha, I said "Never mind I'll going and buy some fags instead", don't worry I haven't.

Sorry for the rant guys, just a bit down with life and myself at the moment.

[nsd_user663_3078]

Sorry to hear about your sister and her husband

This is very sad indeed. Thoughts are with you

[nsd_user663_2955]

Hi marion, ONE PUFF?? is that all, dont beat yourself up over that, one puff to establish it was horrible, one puff is a small price to pay to acknowledge and confirm going back to the ciggs is not good.

You have done so well, you must be proud of yourself.

[nsd_user663_2931]

Yes Marion, like others, I would have smoked the whole thing and then some. I could smoke about 20 right now, so don't beat yourself up over one drag ok?

So sorry to hear of your sisters and the husband too. Must be a very hard time for you. You should feel extra proud of yourself for sticking to your quit.

[nsd_user663_2957]

I would of smoked the whole thing.

It wasn't a whole one, it was a nipped one that was in my boiler cupboard (I hate nipped cigs). If they hadn't been there I wouldn't of done it so I immediately threw the other 3 nipped ones out too (ripped them to shreds in fact).

Thanks for the comments guys, my sis got diagnosed 2 years ago, she'd had it around 3 years prior but it's knocked us for six that her hubby has now got it too. I looked on a Alzheimers forum and there was a guy who's thread read "Started smoking again". He'd given up then got diagnosed, he said he enjoyed smoking so started again as now he knows he's going to die with the Alzheimers anyway. I felt so sad reading it and could understand why he started again.

Anyway not going to get maudlin, done enough of that the last few days. Will have to put some pics up in the other thread (when I find them), I must warn you though I do a bit of photography and editing so have removed my wrinkles.:D

Edited to add: Not removed them all as there were too many even for my editing.

[nsd_user663_2863]

Hang in there Marion,

There's lots of people rooting for you. Your situation sounds really tough.

SMOKING WON'T HELP!!!

All the best,

Bill X