Edited: Hey everyone... I've made it another day, onto 5 now. I'm enjoying being able to congratulate myself daily, haha... back to work today, so a few more triggers to watch out for. I've made it this far, just going to have to figure out how to kick the pumpkin seed habit before its too late. Take care everyone, we can stick with this.
Here is the edit part:
It is now 7pm here... and i'm goin nuts. Nobody to look to for support around here. I researched herbal ciggies, and decided to stear clear of those, as there is still CO and tar in those. With no NRT's, this is becoming one tough ordeal. My boss at work stated today that he quit 18 years ago... and still finds himself saying "no". This scares me. I know that it will be best for health, smell, etc if I never go back. I also wonder if i can handle being an ex nicotine junkie better than being my old junkie self. I refuse to fail at my quest this time... , and i'm sorry if i sound whiny, but you folks are my only outlet to breaking the habit. I live alone, no pets or anything, haha, so you get the brunt of my thoughts. I can't wait till the smell of smokers disgusts me... then at least i will be seeing some progress. 9ish days left in my first two weeks. Heres hoping it will simmer down after that. Summer soon too, and I want to be active more than anything else. Kudos to those that are struggling like me, and kudos to those thinking about a struggle in the near future. We can do it... I'm just not sure I can handle doin it for as long as I have to. Every smoke i had since getting fully dependant, made me hate myself a little bit more. And now, instead of celebrating my freedom from them, I just hate the anxieties and anger I have to everything for no reason. I went from being a vessel that needed a regular nicotine top up, to being a vessel gone empty... somethings missing, and I've got to figure that one out for myself. Fingers crossed, and my willpower's on overdrive. Had to vent a little bit on here. At least nobody is here to see me at my visibly weakest, mentally most strong state ever. Love the forum, take care all, i'll post again day six. My destiny lies in a smoke free day today. PS... if you are wondering, i'm five hours behind.