My mother is ill and I think she is d... - Mental Health Sup...
My mother is ill and I think she is depressed, she says she wants to die, how can I get her help, she will not admit there is a problem
Hi, I'm sorry about your mother being so unhappy, that must be really hard for you. I think It depends a lot upon other factors such as the age and health of your mother, whether she lives alone, whether you know why she is unhappy, etc. Maybe you can talk with her about how worried you feel about her and how sad you feel to see she is unhappy and that you would feel better if she at least talked with you about how she is feeling and let you help her. If she does not do that, and if she is elderly and lives alone then I would talk confidentially with the GP and at least express your concern then maybe they can either reassure you or decide whether to visit her.
Suex
I am sorry to hear your mother is ill Angie and she feels the way she does. If she is depressed then she is probably feeling that nothing and no one can help her and it is all hopeless and pointless. That is a symtom of depression. You can't force anyone to seek help or accept it if they refuse so I am not quite sure what to say to you. Sue has given you some good advice though and I am sure others will be in soon. x
Oh my goodness I could have written this myself (in fact I had to double check I hadn't!)
One thing I have learned from having a sick Mum, is that however painful it is to watch her demise, no amount of trying to pressure her to get help will work.
Be there for her, let her know that you care, and always look out for your own needs. She has to admit there's a problem for herself before she will let anyone help her.
Here anytime you want to chat x
I thought of you when I read this post and agree absolutely with what you have written Lucy. x
The trouble is, you dont realise theres a problem. or at least you dont want to admit it. If your mums talking about death, then its a idication of how ill she really is. Go make an appointment to see her gp. Tell them whats going on and then you have done your best. Maybe the doctor will do a home visit. Or call her. Because of the data protection laws he cant disclose anything to you. So then you have done your best. And leave it up to the professionals.
You could say to her when she says I want to die, or something. Say something like well mum, your not usually like this, tell her the things you have noticed, and that its upsetting for you to see her like this. This is not normal!!.
But its not fair of you to take responisibility for her choices in life or death. Depression is a really bad illness for many reasons. It can turn a wonderful person into a dribbling mess. They are still in there, but the chemicals are missing in her brain, which is making her behave like this. What the drugs will try to do is replace what the brain is missing.
It may take a while, because its complex , and some drugs are different chemicals. The difficulty is finding the right one. So just support her without judgement. Shes ill.
take care Lin
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