School options ASD Twins - one with cognitive and learning difficulties

[j_oliva]

I am struggling to accept separation of my twin boys who are in a small mainstream primary setting.

To get them settled into the right school, I have requested that they transition into a bigger school with an ASD unit so that one can access the mainstream class abc the other can access the unit got up to 80% of the day.

This has resulted in an EP assessment and the LA without accepting a formal request have concluded that twin 2 has severe learning difficulties so cannot attend an ASD Unit.

I don’t want to separate the twins as I feel that it will have an impact on them both emotionally.

Does anyone have any advice, please.

Thank you.

[DrSarahmac]

Hi. This does sound like a difficult transition for them and you but it doesn’t sound as if the education authorities can accommodate them both in the same school. Given that their abilities sound to be quite different they will inevitably surely separate over time as they grow up so maybe it is better to start that process earlier rather than later when it may be more difficult for all of you. Children are remarkably resilient and will adapt if supported and believe that it is a positive change. It certainly sounds positive that one of the twins is able to access a specialist unit. This isn’t always available. What about twin 2 - have they told you what his provision will be?

[Inside]

Hi I agree with DrSarahmac, it would be lovely if both your boys could be kept together however there are pros and cons and I would just like to relate to you a situation my friend told me about; her eldest daughter has Down’s syndrome and there is only a years difference between her and her younger sister they attended the same mainstream primary school and mum wanted them to go to same secondary school but the younger one broke down (age 11) and said she felt like she was her sister’s carer as school staff would sometimes get her to help with her sister. When they both went to different secondary schools they both flourished not being dependent on each other.

I also have a son with Down’s syndrome, ASD with severe learning difficulties and his sister is five years older they attended the same mainstream primary school and when he was upset they often got his sister to come and try settle him. Thankfully their paths only crossed for a couple of years at school, She didn’t mind but I’m sure she would’ve felt more comfortable not worrying about her brother whilst at school.

Hopefully both your boys will settle and gain in confidence and your son with severe learning difficulties will have all his needs met. It is a tough decision good luck to you and your boys for their futures.