22 year old son with autism - moving into own place and living more independently

[Tiffin123]

Hello, I am looking for some advice about how to help my 22 year old son with autism to move into his own place and to live more independently. I have been in touch with adult social services who say they will do an assessment of his needs. The suggestion was that he might get a PA for a certain number of hours per week.

This somehow feels like the biggest step we have ever taken and I was wondering if anyone in this community has anything to share about their experience?

I know there is lots of help and support out there… it’s a case of finding the right thing for my son.

He is hoping to move to Brighton.

Thanks!

[Pink-lady1]

Hi My son is 25 and has lived independently for the last 4 years.

I found him a place myself because the council waiting list was too long.

There are lots of things you can do to help him be independent.

His bills & rent are paid by direct debit & i control his bank account using online banking (I have POA for his finances)

I also load a prepaid paid card each week with spending money.

I order his food shopping online to be delivered each week. And I pay a professional cleaner to go in once a week to change bedding & help him with laundry & cleaning.

We have had a few teething problems, however, we have managed to sort them out. FaceTime is a good tool, when you can’t get there physically. He has Google home similar to Alexia which is great for setting alarms & reminders & asking questions.

He is very happy & prefers to live alone. I worry about him being lonely. But hi is caught up in his own world & his obsessions. I only live one mile away from him.

I hope thus helps. Good Luck.

[Tiffin123 in reply to Pink-lady1]

Thank you for sharing…. Much appreciated

[Percy786 in reply to Tiffin123]

Thank you for sharing. I would like to do the same for my son, but currently it is not financially viable. My son is 19 and has a diagnosis for autism, severe adhd and dyslexia. He currently gets PIP and basic UC. He recently had an assessment for Capability for Work and is in the LCWRA group so we expect his UC to increase. I understand that he can get the single rate room allowance which is about £100 per week. However this income would not be enough to cover rent and all expenses. He has behaviourial problems and is self medicating with cannabis and refused to take adhd medication and has been discharged from adhd clinic. I want him housed as situation at home is getting really difficult. He had a care needs assessment and they say he has a learning difficulty and not disability. The Council have referred him to the enablement team (saying that he does not fall under the 0-25 Disabilities Team) but currently nothing is happening as he will not engage. He has also refused a referral to the drugs service. The Social Worker who did the assessment advised that we should ring the Police if we have any safety concerns, rather than helping us house him with appropriate support. Is your son in private rental accommodation and requires a guarantor? I am concerned regarding this as my son struggles with money management. My son would need help with cleaning, cooking, budget management, seeking medical advise, attending appointments, filling forms etc. I believe my son should be under the Mental Health Social Care Team to get the appropriate support. The Social Worker recently called me asking me to contact the GP regarding this. I would welcome any help/ advice.

[Purdybaby in reply to Pink-lady1]

So was that a private rented flat you found him ? As you couldnt get him a council place.

[sl20]

HiMy son is now 27 and moved into supported living just over a year ago. I don’t think my son would be able to manage by himself so supported living where he shares a house with three other adults is better for him. They have one carer between the four of them who helps with cooking, washing clothes, managing the home etc. We still have a lot of input in his life by supporting him to manage his health needs, social opportunities, finances etc. I suggest when your son has his assessment of needs you concentrate on his difficulties as social services will try and give him as little support as they can provide. It is easier to reduce help if not needed than try and get some more. Good luck

[Tiffin123 in reply to sl20]

Thank you for sharing. We are waiting for assessment and go from there

[Tiffin123]

Thank you for sharing. 😊