Hi it’s Friday again. Been up since 5am this morning. Weirdly I couldn’t sleep, and that just not me!
Reminded me of times in hospital lying awake at night, listening to machines beeping etc - so annoying at the time. Thankfully that’s all in the past.
Do you guys have problems with not sleeping? How do you cope with that?
Are there any tricks we could pass on to one another?
Whatever you are doing - have a great weekend.
Ross
Hi Ross. I'm a lifelong bad sleeper. Can't get to sleep, can't stay asleep, as soon as I nod off the nightmares start. Vivid, more real than real life, weird, frightening then I wake up. Repeat. All night, every night. Then I can't get up.
I've had three good nights since 1989.
I'm constantly exhausted.
I've tried everything possible over the years with the exception of drugs. I think they were suggested once and I said yes please, I'll take the lot and put an end to this.
Hi Ross, luckily I usually sleep well, it is the waking me up that is the problem. The exception is when I am fearful, anxious or stressed or have something big on my mind and then it is the Darkest Hour is Just Before Dawn (Mamas and Papas etc) and I am good for nothing the next day.I was struck how your sleepless night triggered memories of your time in hospital.
I also had something topical that triggered memories of life 40 yrs ago recently and I know I was struck how those memories were so vivid.
I really hope you got a better nights sleep last night, be kind to yourself.
I used to bother about it a lot - something I caught from my Mum, I think, who would sometimes blame worrying about me for her non-sleeping. Then as a much younger woman I would occasionally have a completely 'white night', as they call it beautifully in Spanish. At first I worried about it, then noticed I actually didn't feel at all bad the next day. So I used the time, out of bed, reading, listening to something interesting, getting up and dealing with a job that might be bugging me. Then I'd go back to bed, and end up getting some good sleep. Gradually, the 'white nights' stopped. This is what I still do if non-sleeping, though latterly this is rare and I've been sleeping well, despite lots of worries and responsibilities.
I get that, I think. Weirdly, I didn’t feel tired the next day. Maybe it’s a case that our brains at some point don’t need the rest, maybe we have not been as active in the days before? Who knows.
I don't understand the why of it at all - but I was very pleased to get out of the bind that it was somehow all my fault.
Hey Ross, How are you doing today? I hope you have had some good sleep. Sleeping in hospital with the beeping is very weird, and having that triggered whilst lying awake is difficult, I think. We actually did something with our weekend, and walked down to the coast, and tried a new food truck they have right on the edge of the beach. DH let me explain to them that he couldn't eat the regular options, but he could eat some different things they had on the menu if they could possibly combine those into one meal, which they did, no problem. This is big progress as usually he will just be angry that he can't eat the things, but instead, we all had lunch at the beach together. Then J and I popped in to his work, so I could meet his boss, who is absolutely lovely, and not just because I got free ice cream (I had frozen yoghurt, and it was delicious)
I am not generally a very good sleeper. DH is a very good sleeper, but, since he has his own room (he has kept it because he is still struggling with sleep breathing, and although the tubes and beeps are finally gone, it's a thing to get used to) I am not disturbing him. I don't force myself to try to sleep, and usually find I fall asleep whilst reading , or I will fidget and sort some task that has been feeding my anxiety. I find lying n bed *trying* to sleep counter productive, and ultimately less restful, if I just *can't* sleep
What is "palliative care"?
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