Help needed

[Kelly_ann]

Hi I'm new here I had a sub hemorrhage in January I was given 3 hrs to live and the doctors wasn't going to operate as I was graded a 4 (not sure what that means) but on change over another doctor said I he was going to operate anyway and luckily I came through it I was Ina. Coma for 2weeks I hate the fact I don't remember anything it's really annoying me my mum kept a diary but I don't like to read it my kids haven't coped very well either and my partner had been amazing we only meet in October and became ill in December I was miss diagnosed and ended up dying in bed luckily my partner saved my life and I am alive to tell the tale I am now 6mths post and awaiting my results from the MRI has anyone else developed anxiety and depression after there brain injury and has it for better in time?

[razyheath43]

those symptons can be a problem after any Brain injury,if you feel you need more support then do give the Headway helpline a ring number at top of page,good luck

[cat3]

Hi Kelly_ann and welcome. I think the period after discharge can be quite a lonely and uncertain time. I remember feeling it was a ridiculous come-down going home with no 'safety net' after the intense hospital care.

And the fact that you've no memory of a chunk of your life whilst others are reporting events from those missing weeks can be just plain weird ; it took me over a year to let all that go and accept it as part of the inevitable, temporary loss of brain function.

Perhaps when you've received the results of the MRI and the reassurance which that (hopefully) brings, you can start to rebuild your confidence which, in turn, should help to gradually relieve the depression.

Surround yourself with as much reassurance as possible during this period of readjustment and maybe start by talking to the Headway helpline on 0808 800 2244 during office hours. It's a free call and they'll provide you with the print-outs relevant to your SAH, describing the physical and emotional after effects.

Once you understand that your symptoms are 'normal' it's mainly a case of learning coping methods and acceptance. Stay around and keep talking Kelly. Seeing accounts from people who've been where you are is very comforting.

See you again soon m'love ............... Cat x

[jayne_h]

Hi Kelly Ann,

I'm sorry to hear about your brain injury but it's so good you have a supportive partner who spotted you were unwell and that you had surgery. It can take a long time to recover. My mum had a nasty bump on the head and cut where she lost blood and then passed out on the floor at home. Thankfully she called her best friend after the initial bump who heard mum say she was bleeding and called an ambulance when she heard her pass out.

As Cat said, keep reading on the forum and posting and call headway for advice or mail them. You can get their booklets and your partner can also get one for carers. Apart from the forum and headway, I found a couple of other sources helpful:

The cook book Nourish your Noggin by Tina M Sullivan which shows you how food and spices can help you recover faster. Your family may also like the recipes. Health food and tasty too.

The book on brain injury and recovering from PCS by Dr Diane Stolpert - see drdiane.com It's a bit scientific in the first few chapters but she gives case studies and examples. Her diet requirements were converted into recipes by Tina Sullivan whose son was a patient of Dr Diane.

Your family may find these books of interest too. My mum is a text book case of one of its chapters.

For sure, use a diary, post it notes, maybe even label your cupboards at home if you forget where something is.

I hope you see improvements soon. Try not to worry as getting anxious can make you worse. Take each day at a time.

J xxx

[MXman]

Morning Kelly Anne,

Well done on taking the first step by coming on here and sharing your thoughts, always a difficult step to make. It sounds to me its really early days for you but you have a very supporting partner around you and the grace of God.

Anxiety and depression are part of bi recovery and it will get better more did. The worst part is that you can't remember what happened and you try to reason with it. Im my case it was a moto cross accident and I learnt on here that my brain just did not record the incident so thats why I couldn't remember it. I spent days and weeks trying too but came to learn and really accept that it happened and I would not remember why. Similar to your coma incedent. We have to take life one day at a time in recovery and that works for me and will work for you. Don't try and put too much pressure on your self as this will create more worry and depression for you.

Take one day at a time. Xx Nick

[Kelly_ann]

Thank you for all your comments I'm trying to stay calm and relax but it's easier said than done when my kids don't understand either it's a hard time an I keep telling my self it will get better and there is a light at the end of the tunnel but some days I can't see the light I right a lot of my anger down so I don't get on at my kids or my partner but sometimes it doesn't work I am finding Day to say life hard at the min

[jodr in reply to Kelly_ann]

Hi there just a little post...

My hubby had a bi 10 months ago and for our children it has been incredibly hard having to adjust to a new daddy. I'm not sure how old your children are but there is a book I got from amazon called my dad makes the best boats and they do my mum makes the best cakes both aimed at younger children (mine are 4&5) all about a parent with a bi. It's so hard for children to experience change in their parents and these books are a good place to start to help talk to them about the changes and the fact that you still love them... Even if you shout at them it's not their fault and it's not yours either it's the bi. There are books for older children as well depending on how old yours are.

[Kelly_ann in reply to jodr]

I have 3 children aged 8,10 and 11 they have the books but my eldest won't read it he won't even look at it we are now getting support throw a stronger family scheme witch seems to be helping but only seen her once so hopefully in time she will make a difference to us all I'm just scared for them they almost lost me and I can't do what I used to be able to do with them I know it's only been a short time and things have got to get better but I have no patience anymore

[jodr in reply to Kelly_ann]

I know for my boys they were both very angry for a long time..and still are to a degree.

I think it's hard to comprehend that someone they thought was invincible, their rock and who could do so much previously could suddenly become so vulnerable and change into someone who was cross and shouty and couldn't do the things they could before. They've lost the parent they had and it's a bereavement. But with love and support they will be ok

That's great you've got someone coming in to support you. It's the day to day that is so difficult..have you got family close by that can help you with the children? My mum has been amazing for me, it's nice to know they are in good hands and having a nice time and gives you the chance to rest which is massively important. My hubby needs two 45min-1.5 hour rests every day to be able to cope.

A book I found really helpful was brain injury a practical guide by Trevor Powell. Also touch distance by James cracknell. You and your partner might find them helpful too.

Take care