Okay, so this is an issue which has been bothering me for the past four months.
In June of this year, I was involved in a minor car crash on a small country road. It was raining and my car lost control on a bend, did a 180 degree turn and smashed at an angle into a brick wall at about 25-30mph.
- I did not black out at all during the crash, and remember everything that happened immediately before and after the accident.
-The only injuries I sustained at the time were mild whiplash and a slight bruise where my seatbelt had been locked due to the forces of the impact. I did not physically hit anything.
-My airbags did not deploy, despite the fact that the airbag light on the dashboard was activated.
-The external damage to the car is minimal (a few dents here and there) and suggests that the forces sustained by the vehicle weren't severe enough to cause significant structural damage.
However, 4 hours later I started to feel off and my boyfriend called for an ambulance. After several medical checks I was diagnosed with whiplash and a possible mild concussion, but was reassured that it was nothing serious. I was discharged the following night and told to rest for a few days.
The next day I woke up feeling very anxious. I had the worst headache I had ever experienced, I couldn't find the correct words to say in speech, and I felt incredibly fatigued. I had a hard time focusing on anything at all, and was dissociated from what was going on around me. I still do not know if this was because of concussion or emotional shock, as I had felt relatively okay the day before.
Another thing to note is that my sense of smell and taste had become distorted; buttered toast tasted like soap, and I couldn't really enjoy food for a couple of days. (These senses have since returned to normal.)
My episodic memory was all over the place to the point where I couldn't remember the content of conversations a few minutes after they were spoken to me. I know that PTSD can cause lapses in short-term memory, but my symptoms were worrying to me.
The biggest change has been my ability to listen to, remember and enjoy music. I don't feel quite as immersed in music as I used to be before my accident, and this is extremely devastating to me as a person because I was a musician and composer and music was my natural talent; it was something very important to my identity. I can only hope that it is a psychosomatic problem caused by the emotional impact of the crash and not physical brain damage as a result of my injuries. As I have said before, my doctor believes it is more of the former. In fact, most people I speak to do not believe I had sustained a concussion at all!
I'm here to ask you all for your advice on the matter, as I am tired of not being able to find any answers relating to my issue. Most of my symptoms have cleared, it is only my emotional dissociation to music that hasn't gone away. I also feel like I am not quite as articulate as I used to be but I'm not sure if I'm merely convincing myself there is something wrong when there is not- a kind of self-induced hypochondriasis.
Doctors have told me there is no signs of significant damage to my brain, but I seem to be having a hard time believing them; I seem to keep holding on to the possibility that my injuries were more serious than previously thought and that I do have some kind of permanent brain damage. It is causing me so much stress and anxiety, and I just want to move on with my life and put the car accident behind me.
What do you guys think? Do you think my symptoms are the result of a concussion or do you think I have PTSD? Am I just worrying about nothing?