Introducing myself

Introducing myself

I should start by saying Hello to all. My name's Rich. This is my first post on the site. So, bear with me. It's long!

About myself.

In January 2009 I left sunny England to go travelling around New Zealand as a fit and healthy 29 year old. I first flew out to Thailand, which I loved so much, I decided to see more of South East Asia and abandon my New Zealand plans as it would have eaten through my long saved funds too quickly. Later in the year I ended up in Bali, Indonesia, which was my kinda place. A laid back, slow way of life, "shall I surf today or just relax?" was the sort of dilemma one faced! Anyway, a couple of weeks after being in Bali I met my Lovely, now wife, Indri and ended up prolonging my stay, and my visa, in the island of God. I traveled more of Indonesia as a professional drummer, after joining a band later in 2009.

The end of 2010, after quitting the band to be with Indri back in Bali and after returning Home to England for Christmas I went back to Bali early 2011. On July 1st, while riding my motorbike home from a night out I had some kinda accident, which I'd really like to know what happened, but will probably never remember. For the next 4 weeks I lay in a Bali hospital, in a coma, Indri by my side night and day, praying and looking after me with all her will. My parents and brother flew out to see me and meet Indri, (my rock) Things weren't looking bright for me. As well as having had a Severe head injury I had multiple organ's failing.

My parents visit came to an end and they had to think what to do. They flew back to England, distraught, not knowing what to do after receiving contradictory advice about flying me home in my condition by a Bali doctor/consultant.

"If he stays here in this hospital, he won't make it. If you put him on a plane, he won't make it"

They were very uncertain what to do! They decided I was better off home in England whichever way my fate turned. The only thing they had to do next was raise the money to fly me home, as stupid me, let my travel insurance lapse by 1 month!

Thankfully for all the extremely warm hearted people out there, my brilliant parents and family raised an absolute huge sum of money to fly me home.

The flight home was apparently touch and go, after stopping several times to refuel. I made it.

In England I lay in ICU for a further 2 weeks in a coma.

I was moved to a stroke ward a couple of weeks after I came out the initial coma and then to a private rehab a month or two after that. That time was all a blur to me!

Even though I was awake from the initial coma I had no idea what had happened or where I was. Very surreal time! I'm sure a lot of people can relate.

Indri was granted a UK visa after completing a grueling test. She came over to the UK at the end of October. When she first came to visit me, at first I was shocked and couldn't believe it and then, I didn't believe it. Didn't believe it was really my Indri. This was heartbreaking for her, as you can imagine but she persevered for the next month or so and my trust in her was rebuilt.

One day I wanted to know everything what had happened. Where I was, why I was there, all the questioned that had already been answered many times, by my loved one's.

It was like this particular day, something clicked.

The only way to describe my time post coma is, like a dream! It was like a waking dream, if that makes sense? Very surreal indeed.

shortly after the realization, when my behavior improved, I was moved to an excellent rehabilitation center where I stayed until April 2012.

Indri stuck by my side again and I believe she and the fact she was carrying my baby saved my life. My sweetheart daughter, Tiana. was born on February 12 and she and Indri have made me strive and strive to rehabilitate. In October, me and Indri married and are very happy, proud parents.

Tiana was named after the girl who found my lying on the side of the road, unconscious. She found my mobile phone and informed Indri and my parents in England and also phoned for an ambulance. She was a bit of support for Indri and had a good heart.

I'm very thankful and lucky for all the help me and my loved ones received.

I'm also very thankful for my fantastic wife Indri and the love and care she showed and my darling daughter Tiana who makes me fight and strive endlessly.

My right side has been affected and I'm not mobile as normal but I like to think it's always getting better.

Sorry this is soooo long! There is so much more inbetween but I think I should take a break now!

If you made it this far WELL DONE YOU

14 Replies

  • Hi and welcome to the site :)

    I'm Jo, read your story and yep made it to the end. Well Done You, Indri, your parents and loved ones.... Hello to the lovely Tiana :)

    What a journey.......positive start, very wobbly middle and a happy ending.... thats figuratively speaking, I know it's not the end.

    ( blog name LeslieDilks, click on and read....another long story)

    Take care and enjoy your break :)

  • Hi Jo

    Thanks for reading my story and making it through.

    I read your introductory story and well done for seeing a light at the end of the tunnel. I know it can be very hard to deal with and adjust to a new way of life. Keep fighting and staying strong.

  • welcome, not too long a story I can really relate to it being like being in a dream, I think back to my time in hospital and rehab and its like it's not me, this is a place of great comfort, it helps to put things down and empty your mind, I can't let go of my trauma yet, hopefully one day I will and truly move on, this site saves my family from having to relive things too often, it is helping me move on. Well done to you and your family I' m sure your determination will help you socceed Take care Janet x

  • welcome to the site sounds like you have good people around you

  • Hi Rich - welcome to the chat line. This is my first post.

    I had a sub arachnoid haemoridge in 2011, 2 weeks after I got married. I have no memory of the first 2 months. I even forgot my honeymoon! My wonderful hubby took me on a second honeymoon to New York and Washington last October for our first anniversary.

    It took the hospital a week before they did the scan to find the bleed - they even sent me home. After they found the bleed it was all systems go. I am very lucky - I am now back driving and help out with CAB and a day care centre for old folks.

    My memory has been affected - I can have complete conversations with people and forget it. But I am happier than I can ever remember. My family and friends stood with me through thick and thin. My hubby was brilliant. My mobility is affected too - I set my self little targets and it was a major celebration when we achieved them.

    I have false memories and write everything in shorthand in my head. I have not done shorthand for 25 years! They have never heard of this before and don't know how to stop it.

    Headway has been a massive boost - it is absolutely brilliant chatting to people who have been through the same thing

    Good luck to you

  • Hello Jinty & welcome !

  • Welcome Rich. What a fantastic story...........thank goodness you made it home and are now with all the people who love you.

    Indri and Tiana are both beautiful.

    I hope you continue to improve, and life is kind to you. Best wishes. x

  • Welcome to this site. What a fascinating introduction. You were unlucky to have the accident, but so lucky to be recovering. Naming Tiana after you first helper is wonderful!

  • Thank you for all your welcoming comments. Jinty, I too have memory issues, short term mainly but I'm glad your feeling happy with life and your husband sounds like a great guy. Your rock!

  • My husband is a wonderful guy. Your family sound and look great too.

    We are having a Headway meal out tomorrow - can't wait.

  • Hi again Richdp,

    You must be chuffed, some great comments left following your first blog......hope it's not your last :)

    Richdp, Jinty 1....... Its always good to hear people's stories and this site is great for reassurance, support, help, advice and understanding from like minded people. Its also a big help if you have a question you need to ask....or just to share your milestones or stories, whether they are... positive,negative, informative and so on.......

    Remember......There is always someone here to share and help :)

    All the best to you both and anyone reading....take care

  • Thank you Leslie :)

  • Welcome! You'll find plenty of support here :)

  • A lovely story of love and support... I wish you well

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